Cleverlight: the Story of a Villainess
by ToryW
Summary: <html><head></head>Asajj Ventress, better known as the dangerous Cleverlight, has been resident villain of Jedi Temple for as long as anyone can remember... Full summary inside.</html>
1. Chapter 1: The Beginning Chapter

**You have stumbled upon the weirdest crossover _ever. _You can skip my exceedingly long author's note if you like, but don't blame me if you get confused.**

**OK! I herein combine the plot of Megamind with the characters of Star Wars. My first thought for this story was "Anakin as Megamind, Padme as Roxanne, Obi-wan as Metro Man". But I lacked excitement for that idea, and therefore, the writing lagged. So, it is now an Obi/Asajj fic. Yay! **

**Asajj has been combined with Megamind to create Cleverlight, a character with the traits of both her inspirations.  
>Obi-wan is more himself then Roxanne, but he shares a bit of her burning curiousity and pure cheek.<br>Anakin fit the bill for Metro Man- he is a bit full of himself, and the Jedi adore him.**

**In some scenes, I haven't followed the movie dialouge exactly, but kept the same general themes, and _no, _that's not because I was too lazy to watch the movie again. (I would if I had the time!) I wanted to mix things up a bit, plus I added quite a lot that isn't in the movie at all.**

**These chapters shall be shorter then my usuals, but I shall update _very _quickly!**

**I do not own: Megamind, Star wars, Megamind, Obi-wan, Roxanne, Asajj, or anyone contained herein. Cleverlight is 'my' character, though I doubt my claims would last a day in court.**

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><p>Well, so far, this has been a pretty bad day. Brought havoc to JedihTemple, yelled at my best friend Grievous, lost the guy of my dreams, and got my butt kicked pretty good. It could be worse, I suppose. Oh wait, that's right, I'm falling to my death. So I guess it really can't get any worse. How did all this happen? Well, they do say when you're about to die your life flashes before your eyes. And this, <em>this<em>, is my life.

It all started when I was born. Yes, that's me, a little white-skinned, big-headed, baby girl of eight days old. Obviously I was _far_ too old to still be living with my parents. And so I was launched off into outer space. I remember something about danger lights, and my parent's faces. My mother handed me my minion, Grievous, smiling in his fishbowl, and my father said something about destiny, and then I was gone.

And that, my friends, was when I met Anakin Skywalker. I saw him in his own little escape pod, blazing through space, headed towards the same planet I was. This planet, I later learned, was called Corausant, but I never ventured outside of a large city called JedihTemple. At first my pod was heading straight for the headquarters of JedihTemple, the Temple itself, for which the city was named. But the boy's pod slammed against mine; he skidded right through the doors of the magnificent building, I soared on. No matter. I'd be content just being an ordinary citizen. Obviously fate had something else in mind, however, as my pod landed with a thud in a prison yard. My new home.

I was raised partially by Minion, and partially by three prisoners. It was Hando and Aura who took over raising me, taking on the roles of my parents. As soon as I was old enough to walk, read, speak, all the good things in life, Count Dooku taught me right from wrong.

All the prisoners were quite happy when I broke them out of jail. That is, until the warden caught them and discovered my existence. He immediately decided I should be sent to someplace called shool. By that time, my mind had been set quite against the warden, but I very badly wanted to go to this "shool", so I contented to remain longer at the prison, even though escaping again would be quite easy for someone like me. See, I'm no ordinary human. I'm a girl genius, not to brag or anything. I assume all my race is, or was, as clever as I was at that age.

But that wasn't all that set me apart from the other children I saw the day I first walked into shool. They wore various colored clothes over their various colored skin: clothes in pinks, purples, yellows, blues, and greens for the little girls, and grays, reds, blues, or greens for the little boys. I stood out immediately in my prison orange. Their skin tones ranged from the palest peach to the deepest chocolate. Mine was white as chalk. And my oversized bald head. They all had either long or short hair, also in varying colors.

Right away I noticed that there was a familiar face in my class. Little Anakin Skywalker, who was now my age, was in the front of the room, lifting the teacher's desk over his head… with the teacher sitting on it. Oh, yes, I almost forgot. Anakin Skywalker is invincible. He has super strength, super speed, super vision, and, of course, super lightsaber skills. Oh, and he can fly.

I hoped Anakin might recognize me, that I might have a friend among the children, but no, he stared as shocked as the rest. I heard their whispers all through math (the kind of math I understood at two weeks of age, but that would be bragging), but it wasn't until recess that things went downhill.

I was standing outside, gazing over the fence at the older children playing in their shoolyard in the valley below. I didn't know them then, of course, but later I realized that three of the older children I'd seen would play a very important part in my life. The first was the boy with ginger hair, and the second was the petite brunette girl, and the third was the girl with smooth black hair. I always noticed things like hair; it was such a fascination to a little girl with none of her own.

"Hey Jailbird!" I whirled. Me? What did a bird have to do with living in jail?

"Yeah, you. We're playing dodge ball. Wanna join us?" It was Anakin Skywalker, as well as a cluster of children who seemed to follow him like puppies. I didn't want to become one of his puppies.

"No thank you. I want to play all by myself."

"Well, you either join us and play by the rules, or you form a team of your own."

"Then I will be by myself." I often wonder if I had joined him in that game of dodge ball, would we have ended up mortal enemies.

"Get her!" yelled one of his teammates, and suddenly I found several dodge balls pelting towards me. I tried to avoid them, but there were too many and nowhere to run. It became a pattern for every recess after that.

That is, until the day I revealed my second ever invention: the ray shield hat! Unfortunately, while the device worked perfectly, dodge balls hurtled everywhere. They smashed windows on the building and nearby cars; hit other children, and one smashed straight into the teacher. At least, it almost did, as precious Anakin swooped to her rescue again. Mr. Goody two shoes got a gold star for rescuing her. I was placed in timeout, which the other children found quite amusing. Minion told me that perhaps I should try to make friends with the others, and I decided to create a treat for them, as Mr. Goody Two Shoes often did, using his laser eyesight in the most show-offy way to bake cookies, pop corn, and just in general buy their affection. So I got to work.

I created a "body" of sorts for Minion's bowl to rest on where a head should be. It was equipped with a laser, which should have caused pie to bake. Only it didn't. It exploded, throwing hot fruit everywhere. It was an honest mistake, really. But after Anakin _inhaled_ all the flames and caught all the hot fruit himself, guess who got timeout? Oh yes. Yours truly.

And that was when it hit me. I couldn't do anything right. Everything I did was bad. So then and there, I decided that if I was a bad girl, I was going to be a very, _very _bad girl. The baddest.

And so it began! I would come up with some diabolical scheme, and Anakin Skywalker would stop me. He'd win some, I'd _almost _win others. And as our battles grew bigger, so did we. The perfect little boy became a "perfect" man. I grew too, although I remained fairly scrawny, and never did get too tall. And when we grew, we took on new names. He chose the name "Chosen One: defender of JedihTemple", because of an ancient prophecy about the chosen one. I chose something a bit more humble. I became Cleverlight: exceedingly gorgeous criminal genius and brilliant master of all evil! Yes, I became the villain- and I loved it!

My name is Asajj Ventress, and this is my story.

**As I'm sure there's about... one person reading this, make sure to review! (coughcoughTerraYoungcough) ;)**


	2. Chapter 2: The chapter that comes next

**Mace Windu reminded me strongly of the warden, so here he is- windu, warden of Jedi Temple prison. **

**I very dearly wanted to keep any 'attraction' out of Obi-wan and Asajj's first meeting; they are both young, maybe ten or so.**

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><p>"Good-morning Ventress." Mace Windu, warden of JedihTemple Jail peered through the round porthole into Ventress's cell. The girl was amusing herself with the spinny chair. Round and round she twirled, pausing every so often to scrawl something down. It appeared to help her think. He considered for a moment the possibility of taking the chair away; anything that helped Ventress <em>think <em>was an exceedingly bad idea. He'd already confiscated over two dozen inventions and tools, as well as quite a bit of building material. She'd absolutely threw a tantrum when he took away her paper, however, so he'd consented to let her keep notepad and pencil.

"Ah, Master Windu." She paused her spinning to look at him. "You'll never learn, will you?"

"Learn what? That I'm going to have to take away that spinning chair?"

"My name, Windu. Have you forgotten already?" She made a 'tsk' sound as she twirled around a full 360. "But with a brain capacity like _yours_ I can't exactly blame you."

"You see? Arrogant little brat, isn't she?"

Cleverlight perked up at that. Who was he talking to? She didn't see anyone else. "Talking to yourself again?" She twirled around halfway, then leaned back to face him upside-down, head hanging over the back of the chair.

"Just giving a curious Padawan a tour." Sure enough, there was a smaller face peering through the porthole.

"She doesn't look particularly dangerous." The boy piped up.

"She isn't. She's just very difficult to keep contained. That's why she's got such a high security cell."

Standing up, she whirled to face the two Jedi. "Not dangerous? Not _dangerous?_ I have inventions that could destroy this whole city if they got into the wrong hands. And you have the nerve to call me not dangerous. Ha!"

"I've yet to see you destroy anything close to the whole city."

"Is that a challenge?"

"No, no. Not a challenge."

"It has the air of a challenge. Perhaps I'll have to take you up on that when I get out of here."

"You've also seem to have forgotten where this jail is. You've never come back to demolish it."

"Oo, you're just tempting fate today, aren't you Windu?" She'd never destroy this jail. As much as she hated this cell, which was painted in patterns of pink, it was her home. And such a lovely chair as the one here could not be destroyed.

"It doesn't matter. You still have six life sentences to live out."

"My, I thought I'd be up to at least ten by now. Tsk. I'll have to work on it. Oh, how many life sentences do you think I'd get for blowing a hole in the side of my cell and getting away? Just as a random, non-specific example?" Her hands were clenched behind her back.

Windu narrowed his eyes. "You'd get one more; I'd make sure of it."

Cleverlight suddenly whipped a small gun out from behind her back-where the heck had she gotten _that?_- and grinned evilly. "Well, then, seven it is!" There was a loud _boom!_ and as the smoke cleared, a large hole was visible in the wall of her cell. She didn't run through it though, just stood behind her chair, shooting a challenging look at Mace.

Master Windu let out a startled "Gah!", possibly the beginning of "Guards!", as they came running. Three yellow-shirted guards and Mace himself shoved into the cell, splitting around the chair like a river around a rock. Cleverlight didn't dart for the hole as they'd thought she would. She jumped over it, catapulting herself outside the cell and slamming the door shut.

"Ha! You fools fell for one of my favorite tricks!"

"This… this is a projection!" the warden realized.

"Too true, Mace Windu, too true! And now guess who's free? I am! Oh yes, victory is sweet!"

"Open the canyon! Don't let her get past!" the warden yelled, and one of the guards in the cell pressed a button on a remote. Suddenly the building's floor opened, revealing a simple cement pit. Cleverlight skidded to a halt. _What, no alligators? _She thought scathingly. Suddenly she saw the boy, clinging desperately to a pipe above the chasm. The pipe was not holding him, he was going to fall. Such a fall could really hurt him, maybe kill him, given how frail humans tended to be.

"No! Obi-wan!" Mace pressed himself against the glass, feeling helpless. Qui-gon was going to kill him!

Cleverlight acted without thinking, a nasty habit of hers, whipped out her gun, and shot him, just as he fell.

"What have you done?" screamed Windu. Had the girl finally done what she'd never done before? Had she killed someone?

Ventress didn't answer. She'd already jumped down, using her gun to prevent falling so quickly. It really had been wise to put in that "boost" setting Minion had suggested. Not enough to get out of the pit, certainly, but enough to get down safely. She really should have tested how well cubes held up to falling. Would they protect you? Or would you get smooshed worse?

She picked up the cube gingerly, and then paused, weighing her options. She was too curious to wait for water. The girl spat on the glowing blue object, which burst back into the red-haired boy. "You aren't, uh, dead are you?"

He sat up. "You saved me with that… freeze gun."

"It's a dehydration ray." She explained.

"But I thought you were a villain?"

Oops. "I _am _a villain. I just didn't feel like letting you die."

"Oh?" One eyebrow arched over one blue eye.

"Yes, you may be useful someday. And besides, if I wanted you dead I'd find some way of doing it myself.

"You're not a fan of the cliff drop?"

"Pfff. Cliffs! So primitive! I mean, I have intellect that can create… Death rays! Come on, cliffs? Pathetic."

The boy smiled. His eyes were very blue, Cleverlight noted. She liked the color blue. It was her favorite color. She often wished she had blue eyes to match her blue color scheme. Her own remained dismally green.

By this time several more guards had dropped down a ladder and seized Cleverlight's "De-gun"; _drat, that was the last one! _Obi-wan felt a burst of pity as they seized her, taized her three times, and dragged her up the chasm, limbs dangling. She wasn't that dangerous. Once would have been enough.

And that was the first time Asajj saw the blue-eyed boy.

**You're reading the second chapter? you mean the bizarity of the first has not driven you away! Bravo, reader.**


	3. Chapter 3: Ooo, another chapter!

**Ah, the dreaded high school chapter. I find it hard to believe that Megamind and Roxanne attended high school together, so in this story, Cleverlight goes to high school... for one day. **

**The other kids in her high school are all brats though.**

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><p>Mace Windu's face peered through the portrait hole. "With the exceptionally good behavior you've been showing, I believe we'll be allowing it after all, Clev- I mean, Ventress."<p>

"Good behavior? I don't do good behavior."

"Well, you've made it anyway. You're going to high school."

Her eyes widened. "That's the surprise? Back to shool? I'm never going back there. Never." At the end of her little proclamation, she folded her arms over her scrawny frame and gazed up at Windu, daring him to tell her otherwise. He did.

"We're trying to give you another chance to re-enter society. I know you're already smarter than most high schoolers-"

"Aw, thank you, Windu, you're too kind." Her voice was laced with the familiar sarcasm. When he'd said good behavior, he hadn't meant good respect. It was all she did, day and night, smart off to guards and prisoners alike. Probably what she spent her time thinking of, with a brain like hers.

"Ahem. You will be entering as a freshman, as you are fourteen years old. We think."

"You think? Why, I never knew that! With the way you act it's quite a surprise, actually."

"Please, Cleverli- Ventress, listen. You start tomorrow."

Suddenly she looked afraid. "Tomorrow? So soon?"

"Mm-hm. So be ready bright and early tomorrow."

"Can I make a quick phone call?"

"No."

"Why not?" She sank into the chair, arms still folded.

"Because you'll call your fish friend and tell him to break you out today instead of whatever day you have planned. No." He strode away without another word.

Entering shool the second time was even harder than the first. She was alone; Minion was waiting until tomorrow to rescue her- tomorrow! There were even more children here, and they were bigger children. She felt even more conscious of her orange jumpsuit. And, she learned, older children were harsh. It was a dog-eat-dog world in here, and she was at the very bottom of the food chain. Even the kids dubbed nerds and losers were above her, and they reveled in letting her know.

Walking through the front door, the first kids she saw were very familiar. There was Anakin Skywalker. He was hovering slightly, head and shoulders visible above a crowd of swooning girls. And there was another familiar face- that ginger haired boy! Force how he'd grown! She felt a little lurch in her stomach. And she was still a scrawny little thing.

Then they spotted her. And then, worse than before, worse than staring, they laughed. It started small, but then they were all laughing at her, all except the ginger haired boy, she noticed. But it was too much, even for a 'hardened criminal'. She turned and ran off down a hallway, her backpack holding her back. She dropped it, letting it lay in the middle of the hallway. Ventress didn't care anymore. She just needed to get away from all the mocking people.

She found her locker, but she had nothing to put in it anymore. Asajj didn't cry. Ever. She didn't cry now, but she leaned against the metal storage unit, sighing and wishing she were anywhere but here.

"Hey, it's the freak!" She'd show them! She'd make sure to bring her dehydration gun if she ever came back, and she'd reduce every one of them to small glowing blue cubes scattered through the halls, and she'd go to all her classes alone… Maybe she could leave the ginger-haired boy. He was remarkably… A hand shoved her in the back, slamming her face into the front of the locker next to hers. "Where'd you get the clothes, prison?"

"You know, she actually did!" another voice guffawed from behind her. One of the boys opened her locker, which didn't have a lock yet.

"You're used to being locked up, right? You'll be right at home then." With a wicked grin, the two forced her into the locker and slammed the door. The bell rang. She was missing her first class. Asajj allowed her massive forehead to rest against the locker door. The halls went silent after a while. She could yell for help- some teacher would get her out, but she wasn't the type who liked asking for help. The others would only pick on her more. Time passed endlessly.

She heard footsteps and held her breath, and suddenly, to her surprise, the door opened. There was the boy, his blue eyes kind. "You dropped this." He held out her backpack, weighed down with her books.

"I… I… thanks." She stammered. "But how?"

"It's the only one without a lock." He shrugged as he helped her out of the metal prison, closing the door behind her. "I'm supposed to be in study hall, but I noticed you weren't in Freshman English- they're sharing the library with sophomore study hall today. So I told the teacher I needed the restroom and cam to find you."

"And how do you know I didn't skip class?"

"Because I hear you're a genius. And I get the feeling you're curious, like me. Curious geniuses generally don't skip their first class." He smiled, handing her the heavy backpack, then strode back down the hall just as the bell rang. Students burst from classes, scattering towards their lockers to get books for second classes.

"Wait! What's your name?" she shouted over the din of feet and talking.

"Obi-wan!" he shouted back, walking backwards down the hallway as he answered. _Obi-wan. _It was the perfect name, unique, just like him.

It wasn't until lunchtime that she saw him again, and once again he had to save her from the cruelties of the little gang of haters. It was nice out that day, and, living in a prison, she hadn't had much fresh air, so she took her tray outside to eat, breathing in the clean, cool, autumn air. It had been a mistake to come outside away from the adults in the cafeteria.

"There she is!" snapped a girl, and she found herself flung backwards against the cement, a small group of bigger students leering over her. Was it her fault that she was small? That she had a disproportionate head? White skin? Being a… jail fowl was.

"What gives here?" Time to take a stand. "I just came outside. What did I ever do to any of you?"

"Existed." Snapped a boy. "You're a disgusting freak, that's what."

"Alien."

"Loser."

"Nothing."

"Failure."

"Shut up!" A new voice silenced the insults. Obi-wan had figured out what was going on out here. She saw him push through the crowd, and although one boy shoved him hard in the chest, he just pushed back and pulled out a lightsaber. The crowd backed away pretty fast, and Obi-wan put it away and helped her off the pavement.

"I guess you saved me again." She muttered softly.

"It doesn't matter. You saved my life a few years ago. And don't believe them. You can be something amazing."

"I have thirteen life sentences." She arched an eyebrow at him.

"Well, they are for small stuff like… jailbreak… and with good behavior…"

"But I don't have good behavior. I'm going to be a supervillain." Seeing his skeptical look, she continued, "Why not? The Skywalker boy's going to be a hero, why can't I be a villain?"

"I guess you could, but I wouldn't recommend it."

"I can do it!" she insisted. "I've got the brain power, he's got the super powers, and then we fight!"

He smiled a little. "Have you noticed that the villain always loses though? No one likes the bad guy. Or girl, in your case."

"Well, I've got a jump start on that one."

Obi-wan would have said more, but the bell stopped him again, and once again he was forced to rush off to a separate class. A pity she wasn't in his grade- He hated that she had to go off on her own when he knew they'd go after her again. Maybe they'd let her skip a grade; from what he'd heard, she was smart enough for it.

He didn't find the alien girl again until the end of the day, as he was heading out the door and passed the door to the workshop where mechanical classes were held. Class was over, but Ventress remained, head bent over something complex.

"Whatcha working on?" He popped his head in the door, making her jump.

"Death ray."

"Is it... safe?"

"Erm, probably not."

"So, it's _really_ a death ray?" He was skeptical that she'd create a 'death' ray.

"No. It's more of an… electric shock ray." She was welding carefully around the edge of the gun-shaped contraption.

"Are you supposed to be using that?"

"Probably not, but no one ever told me I couldn't." She glanced up at him for the first time. "Relax. I've been using this kind of tool since I was a little kid." She leaned back over the invention. "Why do they hate me?"

Her whisper was so soft, Obi-wan barely heard it. "I guess they just like having power. And you're a good target." Alien, jailbird, inventor. What else was she?

"Hmm."

"Do you have any friends?"

"Supervillains don't need friends." She insisted stubbornly.

"Not even one?" His voice was hard, but she didn't take the hint.

"Never. I don't need or want any."

"I guess I'll leave then." He stormed out, and it was only then that Cleverlight realized he'd been offering his friendship. What was wrong with her? She wanted him back. Maybe if she came back she could apologize, and maybe, maybe he'd take her back. She wanted to be his friend. Maybe more.

"Hey freak, what do you have there?" Some brat had found her.

She didn't even look up. "Death ray."

He laughed. "You're such a worthless loser. You seriously think that little toy is a death ray?"

She shut off the welder, admiring her handiwork. "You want to see it?"

"The only thing I want to see is your face wrecked, freak." Suddenly she felt his hand on her arm, grabbing her hard, one fist raised, ready to punch her right in the nose... without thinking, she pointed her new weapon straight at his face and fired.

The boy dropped her and fell to the floor, screaming so loudly that four teachers came running. "The jail kid shot me!" her tormentor shouted, hands over his face.

"It was self-defense!" she shouted, but there was no sympathy from the teachers. Two had already escorted the boy, whose face was red, out of the room, and the other two rounded on the guilty party.

"You are _expelled_ from this school!" one snapped, grabbing the gun from her hand. "Obviously you can't handle being around other children."

"I can handle other children, they can't handle me!" she protested.

Suddenly Obi-wan had reappeared. "It's true, they were attacking her earlier."

"Look, Obi-wan, I don't need your input. They were attacking her earlier, so she attacked back. We have no choice but to get rid of her."

"But I wanted to-" _apologize..._

"No buts." Snapped the other teacher, and then she'd grabbed Asajj by the arm and led her away. She did manage to catch a snippet of the other teacher's words to Obi-wan.

"She's a prison kid and a villain. She's vicious and dangerous, and always will be." She didn't see Obi-wan again for almost ten years.

**The childhood chapters are finished! The next time the pair meet, Cleverlight will be a hardcore supervillain, as well as an adult. Next, Ventress kidnaps Obi-wan for the very first time! After that, we move onto the big day- Chosen One day! :D**


	4. Chapter 4: Preceded by three chapters

**There's a first time for everything, and this chapter details the first kidnapping.  
>I had fun designing Cleverlight's outfit- it's Megamind, yet the silk skirt, gloves, and necklace just <em>scream <em>Ventress to me.  
>Obi-wan takes on a bit of Roxanne's personality here, but I made sure to leave in the flirty energy that exists between him and Asajj.<br>'Braindroids' are partially brainbots, partially battledroids, because who doesn't like both of those adorable little robots?**

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><p>"Sir, it's so good to see you back where you belong!" The braindroids crowded around her, buzzing excitedly. She'd already changed out of that awful orange jumpsuit and into her typical: black leather short sleeved shirt with the bright blue lightning bolt; spiked, fingerless gloves; black leather pants, with a silky black skirt over top; her favorite spiked boots; a black choker with silver spikes; and the belt holding her favorite weapon: the dehydrator gun. The crowning article was her cape: ground-length, black on the outside, blue on the inside, with spiked shoulder pads and a high collar to frame her tall face.<p>

Asajj Ventress, known better as Cleverlight, smiled. Minion never had gotten over his habit of calling her "sir", and neither had those brain droids. In fact, the brain droids barely spoke at all; she'd managed to get them to say, "yes sir" or "no sir" or "fetch!" which was quite an achievement for robots with their intelligence level. Even the captain, the one she'd managed to give quite a bit of high-tech programming to, was unable to thoroughly comprehend much of anything. Still, Cleverlight wouldn't trade them for anything, except her best friend and sidekick, Grievous. He was better known as "Minion", as young Cleverlight had believed that to be his name for a few weeks, and by then it had stuck.

"I'll say so, Minion. Ugh, that cell and its wretched pinkness, almost as bad as the time Marietta wore that dress…" Cleverlight shuddered at the very memory of the pink, sparkly, glamorous gown Anakin Skywalker's former girlfriend had once worn. "My eyes have never been right since." Thank goodness Chosen One had broken up with that squealing, fashion-conscious, _obnoxious_ girl, as they were no longer forced to kidnap and then put up with her.

But then again, with no girlfriend to kidnap, there was no way to lure Chosen One into her diabolical traps, and there was simply no fun in breaking out of jail if you couldn't set up a fantastic scheme. If she waited too long, it would look like she'd had no plan. But how to lure him… Simply asking the man to show up rarely worked, and it was so _uncool_ to have to beg him to come.

"Perhaps we can introduce him to a new girl, sir. One who would be not such a nuisance to kidnap?" Minion's fishy face, inside the dome atop his mechanical, four-armed body, broke a toothy smile, and Cleverlight couldn't help smiling in return.

"Genius, Minion, but I'm not sure how we'd do that…" She paused, thinking. "Oh for crying out loud!" Minion jumped, or something close to it, inside his dome. "He's got to have other people close to him _besides_ obnoxious girlfriends! There's gotta be someone Minion!"

"Well, sir, as he's a Jedi, he has a Padawan and a Master. We could try one of them."

"Hm." Minion took that as an affirmative and clanged over to the computer, where he hacked a few files and began reading.

"It says here that he has a young female Padawan named Ahsoka, aged about fourteen."

"I don't know… kids… I'm not sure I should be working with kids… very dangerous stuff here…" Cleverlight mused. Minion was used to her thoughts trailing off whenever she was pondering deep thoughts. When it was a new idea, she babbled excited strings of words, and for new inventions, she would explain things quite clearly, but usually in a somewhat jumbled thought process. He was fairly sure he'd never comprehend her train of thought, part of which included hanging papers from the ceiling in what appeared to be sporadic order.

"Well, if you want someone older, he has a master; he's a year older than Chosen One and yourself." Minion turned to her. "What do you say? Shall we give him a shot?"

"We'll give him a shot. You get this master of his. I'll ready the thermo ray."

"Alligators this time sir? Or do you want the gun to the head?"

"Ah, give the guy a break Minion, he's a newbie." Cleverlight grinned, her red lips drawing across her pale face.

"Right sir. And don't forget your necklace."

"Necklace, right, thank you Minion!" She called after her loyal sidekick as he thumped his way out the lair's secret door. This time they were hidden out in the old abandoned observatory, once they'd added quite a few of Cleverlight's contraptions.

Cleverlight was, by far, one of the most amazing inventors in the history of the world. At least, she would be if she had actually made her gadgets available to others. Mostly she kept them for herself. From Brain droids to dehydrators to a ray that simply exploded things, she had everything. She had quite a selection of homemade tools as well, and also a lot of large, complicated machinery that mostly was shut down due to Chosen One damage. Her current project had taken a lot of time so far, and it wasn't yet complete, but when it was…

Cleverlight dropped back into her favorite chair, the black leather covered, rolling, spinning, reclining chair, watching the Thermo Ray warm up. Her newest invention… The power to become anyone was going to be hers! Of course, it could take years to perfect. But that one time it worked would make it all worthwhile. Then she had to get it down to size so it would fit in an ordinary object- Minion had suggested a watch.

Ah-she'd almost forgotten the necklace. One of Cleverlight's signature fashion pieces was a bright red ruby pendant, which hung on a silver chain. It didn't do anything, but it certainly looked cool. She'd managed to convince Mace Windu it was harmless, so he allowed her to keep it, even in her cell. It really was harmless, but losing it would be devastating. It was all she had left of her homeworld.

"Sir, Grievous has returned with a weird man!" Cleverlight turned to her captain braindroid. The robot-like head was perched upon a spherical body, which was suspended in midair. Several long arms hung beneath it, arms the braindroids used to pick things up and repair machines, but unlike the other braindroids, the captain lacked the large metal jaws the others used to tear apart materials. They were also overly excited by "fetching" a certain wrench with their jaws. The only problem was that they liked to bite, especially leather. And as Cleverlight wore quite a bit of leather, she bore quite a few bite marks from day to day.

"Here he is, direct from the Temple itself, a certain Master Kenobi!" Minion set a robed body with a bag over his head in the chair in the center of the room and set about tying his wrists. Cleverlight turned away, slightly bored. All this was just prep for the real fight. "You get the bag off his head, please. I need to go grab the main power cell." Cleverlight nodded, as the main power cell was far too heavy for her to lift. As Grievous strode out of the room, she tugged the bag off the Jedi's head.

Oh. Force. No. It couldn't possibly be the same boy-er, man. Same ginger hair, same face… If he had the same blue eyes…

"Grievous, why is he still knocked out?"

His voice drifted in from the other room. "I didn't know if I'd need more to knock out a male, so I just used all of it!"

"All of it? Well now I have to make more!"

"Sorry!" Cleverlight was still looking at the man's glossy hair. She'd never seen hair so close before, much less _his_ hair. Slowly she raised one hand, stretching out hesitant fingertips…

"One…urg… main power… uh… cell." Grunting, Minion heaved the contraption into the room, and Cleverlight hurriedly stepped away from their captive.

"Now to contact Chosen One!" She scurried to the communication station, but before he'd even grabbed any of her buttons, dials, or levers, there was a groan from the human. She whirled her spinny chair around to face him.

"Who…" His eyes opened, and he took in the room with bright blue irises. "Cleverlight." Asajj was surprised to notice that he looked… _afraid. _That wasn't something she'd suspected from a Jedi. Was she really so terrifying? And from him, who knew her, who'd once offered her his friendship.

"That is correct. I'm Cleverlight. And you are… Kenobi, yes?" She had never known his last name. How ironic that this Kenobi fellow was actually Obi-wan!

"Erm, yes… what is it you want with me?" Obi-wan hadn't seen her in years, and she looked incredibly different. The orange prison clothes were long gone, replaced with black leather and silk. Metal spikes also appeared to be an important part of her ensemble, as did the color blue. Her lips were as red as ever, but now there was a _slight_ feminine shape to her narrow frame. The overall effect was pretty good, actually.

"You, my dear, are simply bait in my latest scheme. This time, Kenobi, you shall see me defeat your Padawan!"

Every trace of fear vanished, and he smirked. "Cleverlight, you've never succeeded yet."

Already the snarky Jedi was getting on her nerves. "There's a first time for everything. This is your first kidnapping, isn't it?"

"Touché, darling." And yet she almost liked him. Still. He had a wit to match her own. He was very much the same boy she'd known in her days-er, day- as a high school student, and the same curious boy she'd saved from falling into a canyon in the city jail. But now it was time to contact Chosen One.

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><p>Anakin Skywalker was strolling through the gardens at the Jedi Temple, searching for his Master. Having a master was more for tradition's sake than anything else; there was nothing his master could teach him. He already had a flawless fighting style, and was pretty much the most amazing Jedi anyone had ever seen.<p>

"Sign my notebook? Please?"

"Ahsoka's one lucky girl! Training with Chosen One!"

"No, that Marietta's a lucky girl!"

"But he broke up with her!"

"So? I'd do anything for just one kiss from him!" *dreamy sigh*

"Will you sign my lightsaber?"

The excited cheers of younglings and Padawans, mostly female Padawans, drifted into the temple, letting everyone know exactly where Skywalker was. Suddenly, a huge cloud of smoke erupted just outside the Temple walls. Chosen One's eyes narrowed. Cleverlight was at it again, little witch she was.

She opened her conversation the same way she always did- with a villainous laugh. "Mwahahahahaha! Not expecting me today, were you Chosen One?" Her white, oversized head was projected onto the smoke cloud by one of her pesky braindroids, although he couldn't see where it was.

"As a matter of fact, no." He zoomed into the air, doing a little flip. "But it doesn't matter. I'm always ready to take you on." The Jedi, who had now clustered around their hero's feet, cheered as though he'd said something exciting, still following him like the children had done in school.

"Oh, that's so fascinating. But you're going to have to come fight with me on _my _terms today. And away from all your little puppies."

"The only puppies here are your rotten robots! And you can tell your fishy sidekick that he should quit helping you and get a life!" More cheering.

"Hey! I heard that!" Minion's voice drifted in from the background.

"Minion, what have I told you?" Cleverlight turned away from them for a moment. "When someone stupider then you insults you, it's only a sign of their stupidity."

The crowd paused for a moment, and then began booing. "You're just too much of a coward to come here and say that to my face!"

"Oh, I would, but I've been quite busy with my hostage."

"Who do you have now, you sick, twisted…"

"I've kidnapped your master!" A second image was projected onto the smoke screen, this time of Obi-wan Kenobi, tied to a chair.

"Master!"

"Oh, if you ever want to see your master _alive_ you'd better get over here right away. Because I have a feeling that he's going to have big problems otherwise." Obi-wan let out a startled gasp as the floor beneath him opened, revealing a pool filled with…

"Piranhas? You honestly couldn't think of anything less cliché?" Obi-wan glanced off camera, obviously towards Cleverlight.

"Do you _mind?_ Hostages are supposed to keep their yaps shut unless they're crying for help or begging for mercy."

"Well don't come to expect it from me, Cleverlight. I'm an investigator. I don't beg and I don't scare easily."

"Minion, get him off camera!" She yelped, and his face disappeared from the smoke. "If you want your smart aleck master back, then get your sorry self over here! Or it'll be too late! Mwahahahahaha!" Her face disappeared, and several braindroids began siphoning away the smoke, most likely to use at another occasion.

Back at the lair, Cleverlight ended transmission, then strode to the edge of the pit surrounding Kenobi, hands clasped behind her back, covered by her silky cape. "I'd appreciate if you'd shut up."

"Hey, I'm just saying. Piranhas are pretty overused." Same signature smirk.

"I notice they are still highly eager to eat you, cliché or no." She grabbed a small remote, holding it up tauntingly. "At one touch of this button, you will be dropped into the pit with those piranhas."

"You wouldn't."

Cleverlight tapped the top of the button threateningly. "Oh, really? Try me."

"Well don't tap on it like that!" Ah, a nervous reaction.

"Why not?" her face split into a wide grin. Sadly, she dropped it when Minion entered the room and announced the Chosen One was on his way.

Obi-wan sucked in a quick breath through his teeth, but all that happened was that one of the monitors flickered off. She'd been holding the wrong remote… or she was just a total softy. A slow grin crossed _his_ face. "Oh, no, a TV remote, I'm terrified." Cleverlight wrinkled her nose at the sarcasm.

"Keep quiet or I gag you next time." There was a huge crashing slam. Chosen One had arrived. Anakin Skywalker stood up, looking around. "Code: hit him with the thermo ray!" Cleverlight hissed into a communicator, still near the edge of the piranha pit. A large, threatening gun-like contraption snapped to life, Minion at its controls.

"You know, Sir, the point of a code…" but he did as instructed anyway.

An icy bolt missed Chosen One by feet, instead freezing one of the monitors solid. "Ha!" snapped Anakin, darting around the maze of boxes in a search for his master. More bolts flew, all of them missing. Cleverlight snarled angrily, watching through another monitor. She and the hostage were tucked safely behind another line of boxes, but she longed for a bit of the action. But Minion had so badly wanted to handle this fight himself, so she'd let him.

"If it freezes things, then why is it called a _Thermo _ray?" Obi-wan asked.

Cleverlight let out a growl through her teeth. "It made sense at three in the morning, okay?"

SMASH! One blow from Anakin's fist broke the boxes apart, revealing their hiding place. Chosen One and the thermo ray were now dangerously close to where Kenobi was tied. Force, she had to get him out of there!

Chosen One had, at the same time, used his heat vision to break his master's bonds. Obi-wan had jumped up and leapt the chasm, but he smashed in midair into Cleverlight, who had tried to get across to cut him free. The pair tumbled downwards, heading straight for the piranha filled waters, but a large net burst across the pit, catching them both.

"You weren't actually going to let me fall; you had a safety net here!" the Jedi stared at her incredulously. The 'villain' had put in safety measures? Cleverlight didn't have time to reflect on how Obi-wan had just figured out her deepest secret. The net was tearing; it wasn't designed for two.

"Code: hit the water!" she screamed. Minion obeyed quickly, and an icy bolt froze the water solid just as the net tore and kidnapper and kidnappee plummeted towards what had once been a death pit. Minion had no time to get them out, he was trying to get away from Chosen One, who had now destroyed the thermo ray and was trying to catch the robot-fish. He didn't even notice his master or Cleverlight.

Ventress hit the ice, but Obi-wan hit Ventress, and suddenly scrawny little Cleverlight was pinned beneath him. Oh Force, She was so _close_ to him now, it was disgusting! And producing a strange rush of hormones. "Augh!" get off me!" Obi-wan scrambled to his feet, slipping on the ice, but realized he could use his size against the villain. He threw his arms around her as she got up, holding onto her despite her protests and struggles. "Let me go! Let go of me!"

"Anakin I have Cleverlight!" he yelled. She couldn't make this easy, could she? But then again, she never had. It was what made her mind so intriguing.

"No, no, no…" She yelped. Obi-wan had released her, and she scrambled around the edge of the pit, searching in vain for a way up, but too late. Anakin grabbed her by the back of her cape, crushing her high collar with his hand. "Oh great." She snapped. Her eyes suddenly landed on Obi-wan, who was smiling at his Padawan, or, more specifically, at the sight of his Padawan holding her up by her scruff like a misbehaved cat. "This isn't over Kenobi!" she snarled viciously. "You are so dead when I get out of prison! Dead!"

Anakin laughed. "She's not getting out again, don't worry Master." The hero caught his master by one hand and lifted him out of the pit, setting him on his own feet. Obi-wan was fairly sure she would get out again, but he also got the feeling there was nothing to fear from this amusing villain. Villainess.

**Wow, you're _still _reading this bizarre crossover? You have impressed me, reader. Chosen One day is the next chapter!**


	5. Chapter 5: Fifth in a series

**Ah, Chosen One day! this one's a little short, but I'll update _very _soon, and the next chapter shall have some nice Obi-wan/Cleverlight bantering! **

**Does anyone have a suggestion for Obi's padawan's name? She's currently just 'his new padawan'.**

**Thank all of you so much for your reveiws!  
>General Herbison: You haven't seen Megamind? <em>You haven't lived! <em>I'd reccomend borrowing a copy from a library. The fic might make a bit more sense, plus it's a very good movie all on its own!  
><strong>

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><p>Obi-wan was right. She broke out of jail time after time, and yet she never actually managed to hurt anyone: she tried to hurt Anakin but was unable to, and she went to great lengths to make sure Obi-wan was safe, although she never let on.<p>

Slowly their years passed. Anakin's popularity grew even greater. All of the city, and especially all the Jedi, practically worshipped him. He could do no wrong in their eyes. Young single girls dreamed of dating him, despite the fact that in the past anyone he dated was a prime target for Cleverlight.

Cleverlight's schemes and inventions grew bigger and more elaborate, but they all ended fairly the same: with her back in her pink flowery jail cell. But she grew to enjoy bantering with her hostage more than bantering even Chosen One himself. As much as the hero called _her_ predictable, when it came to wit, his answers were canned and dull, no match for Asajj's razor quick tongue. But Obi-wan often bested her in the game of wit, which presented a challenge. She found that she was a bit _attracted_ to the man she kept tied up several times a week. Well, she'd always been. But now it escalated to the point of recognition. She got jitters before he arrived, and whenever she was forced to be close to him.

Obi-wan had been promoted to Temple investigator _and _reporter, and he had a new Padawan. The council had told him Anakin no longer needed a master, and hopefully removing him would stop the kidnapping. It hadn't, thank goodness. Honestly, he found it to be quite an exciting twist to his week to end up talking with the villain and her strangely friendly fish sidekick. Mostly the villain. As predictable as her plans were, there was nothing predictable about her personality. His new Padawan, on the other hand, was an incredibly dull sort of girl. And she seemed to have something of a creepy crush on him.

"As today will be the first ever annual Chosen One day, we plan on revealing the statue of Chosen One that stands outside the Chosen One museum. As you can see behind me, the statue is currently covered, so we can only guess what it looks like. However, I'm sure the statue will perfectly represent Chosen One in a way that highlights all his best qualities." Obi-wan drew his hand across his throat, indicating to Master Secura to cut off camera. Seriously, the stuff they made him read on air…

"That's a wrap, Obi-wan. I'll take the footage back to the Temple for you if you like."

"Yes, thank you Aayla." His blonde camera woman began expertly unloading the film from the camera, her long hair swaying in the gentle breeze. Obi-wan gazed up at the long gold curtain covering a statue of his former Padawan, wondering if Cleverlight would try to pull anything today. Who was he kidding, of course she would! And then he saw her. His new Padawan. Oh boy, was it too late to escape?

"Hey Master, you all finished?"

"Erm, yes, just finished shooting, why?"

"Maybe we could go out to lunch together?"

"It's nine in the morning."

"Okay, coffee then? Just you and me?"

"No thanks, I've got some other stuff to work on around here."

"What stuff? I can help you out."

"That's alright, I can handle it." He turned away, toying with his microphone. All of a sudden, he heard the familiar sound of a can being shaken. _Thank you Minion…_ he thought drowsily as he passed out, being caught by the robotic arm.

* * *

><p>"Cleverlight, you have a…" the warden stopped, his brown eyes wide, as he realized Cleverlight wasn't in her cell. How could she have escaped already, they'd just brought her in four days ago! "She's gone!"<p>

"Gotcha!" Cleverlight jumped up from where she crouched below the window, plastering her face across the glass. The warden, even though he was a Jedi, jumped back in terror. The genius laughed as she leapt back into her favorite chair. "Good morning, Windu."

Mace attempted to keep his composure. "You have a gift."

"Oo, presents? Is it from Minion? He does love to spoil me." Mace had put up with her for so many years that he'd learned to ignore the sarcasm.

"No. It's from Anakin." He lifted a beautiful, _familiar _watch out of the box, along with a small note, which he read aloud. "Ahem. 'To Cleverlight. To count the minutes until you're released, which shall be never. Pity you'll miss the party being thrown for me.' Huh, I never knew Anakin to gloat. Well, actually, he does gloat, but still…"

"Aren't you going to give it to me?" Cleverlight looked at him with pleading eyes that he'd learned meant trouble.

"I think I'll keep it." Mace strapped it carefully on his own wrist, striding away.

"And you call me a thief," she growled as the window closed. But inside she was doing a victory dance. It was all working out as planned. Minion should have Kenobi by now, and he'd be able to program the watch by remote.

She peered out the window, waiting. It should be right around now… any second… Right before her eyes, Mace was transformed into an exact replica of _her. _Several guards charged at him instantly, tazing him before they dragged him back down the hallway he'd just walked up. Cleverlight didn't see anymore; she'd ducked behind her chair. The guards opened the cell and threw Mace down in the chair, and Cleverlight reached around to snatch the watch from her wrist, hurriedly disguising herself as Mace by spinning the watch's dial. Mace soon looked like himself again, but by now she'd sneaked past the guards and the still drowsy warden.

"Actually, I'm more than a thief. I'm a villain! Mwahahahahaha!" The guards could only stare as she slammed the door, locking them in her own cell. Then, still appearing to everyone as Windu, she practically danced out of the prison, passing guard after guard, who ignored her. It was just Mace doing a happy dance. Weird, but nothing to fuss about.

And there, just as planned, was the invisible car, Minion driving, Kenobi tied in the backseat. "Need a ride, _Windu?_" Cleverlight flicked off the watch as she leapt into the car.

"Nice work Minion. It worked perfectly!" The door was barely closed before the fish was careening away, veering dangerously through traffic. Asajj was used to this kind of driving, as well as quite skilled at it herself. She glanced over her shoulder to where Kenobi lay. His hands and feet were tied, and his hair was falling into his face. Oh, that hair. How she longed to touch it. For years she'd been resisting the urge to bury her fingers in the ginger roots and…

She wasn't quite sure what followed logically in that fantasy. He'd certainly not like her touching him. She knew that, so she didn't, not even when he was knocked out. It was a good thing he was out now, anyway. The very idea of him catching sight of her in this hideous prison uniform… orange was not her color.

**erm... am I supposed to say something here?**


	6. Chapter 6: The chapter of doom

**Even better Obi/Asajj interaction than chapter 4! **

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><p>Cleverlight leapt from the invisible car, glad to be back in her lair sweet lair. The braindroids lowered her tent-like curtain, and inside, she hurried to get back into her leather and spikes and out of this awful orange, glancing at Kenobi when she finished and the tent was lifted into the air He was still out- perfect! She half leapt, half flew across the room, landing in her favorite chair and sending it whizzing backwards, twirling just like her chair at home, er, jail- a pity that <em>that <em>chair lacked wheels! The villainess peered around the edge of the seat, feeling her usual rush of nervous energy at the sight of the bound Obi-wan. _Showtime._

"Ah, Kenobi. We meet again." There she was, in her black leather, looking as attractive as ever, in her own odd way.

"You say it as though it's a chance meeting. It's not exactly fate if you _bring _me here."

"Ah, but today _shall_ be fateful! Today is the glorious day I shall win, and I shall rule JedihTemple!" Obi-wan had long ago given up trying to make her pronounce Jedi Temple correctly.

"You say that every day."

"Do you _mind?_ I'm trying to give an evil schpeal here."

Obi-wan stared for a moment, amazed. "How is it that you can pronounce 'schpeal', and you can't pronounce _'Jedi Temple'_?"

"It's a hard word." Ventress crossed her arms over her chest defensively. "And captives are not ever supposed to criticize their captor's pro-noun-cia-ta-tion."

"Honestly, you can't say that either?"

"Ahem! I was trying to explain that I have constructed the most glorious weapon ever created, and it shall kill Chosen One with its sheer power and destructiveness!"

"I believe you said that last Tuesday, Darling."

Frustrated sigh. "Well, _this _is even more impress-ahve then last Tuesday. It's so amazing, everything in a thirty-four-point-seven-three foot radius will be exploded, and blown to smith-her-ins by my phe-nom-een-al _death ray!_" Oh, Force, the mispronunciations!

"Well, your last death ray didn't go so well." Humph. How dare he bring that up? It had been almost fifteen years. But he still continued to yammer on. "Is it an actual death ray this time?

"I've improved since then, dear."

"You forget that Anakin's improved as well."

Minion cut in at this point. "I thought you can't improve perfection?" The fish certainly lacked in what most people called "tact".

"I guess you're right, Minion, thank you." Obi-wan smiled calmly. Cleverlight looked as though she might rip something apart. "Where do you get all this stuff anyway? I mean, is there some sort of website that sells parts for this kind of stuff? Or a 'build-your-own-death-ray' kit?"

Minion, still clueless about his earlier mishap, grinned and began to explain. "Actually, this all comes from a warehouse in-"

"_Don't _answer that." Cleverlight burst out, and for a moment there was silence.

"_Naboo." _Minion finished in a whisper, much to Cleverlight's horror.

"Minion! Don't you understand this man? He's using his Jedi mind tricks to take answers from your weak-willed brain!" Cleverlight rolled her chair in closer, and Minion slapped his hands over the front of his dome, as though this would prevent him from saying anything more. Cleverlight's voice dropped- ever the drama queen. "He'll figure out all of our secrets." She rounded her chair on the Jedi. "Such tricks…"She rolled behind him, speaking softly and almost seductively, "won't work…" and then, leaning in so close she was practically whispering in his ear, "On me."

When he turned to face her, they were eye-to-eye. "Talk slower, my sweet."

"Don't tempt me." she breathed, and for a moment they remained, foreheads almost touching, bright green looking into bright blue. Finally, becoming aware of their surroundings, Asajj stood up and whipped away, her blue cape swishing into Obi-wan's face.

"You have no secrets, Cleverlight. You're predictable as ever!" Obi-wan snapped, irritable that she'd pulled away from him- the more he stared into the green eyes, the more flustered she'd become.

"Predictable! You dare call me, exceedingly gorgeous criminal genius and brilliant master of all evil, predictable? Well, Kenobi, so you call _this _predictable?" She pulled a lever, and the floor slid away from Obi-wan's chair, leaving him over a pit of…

"Piranhas! Knew it. I was thinking about it on the way over." Obi-wan grinned cheekily, while Cleverlight tried more useless contraptions.

"Then this?"

"Also quite predictable."

"This?"

"Cliché."

"What's this one do?"

"Tacky."

"Scary, right?"

"Pathetic."

"Oh, no, look at this!"

"Saw that coming."

"How about this one?"

"Juvenile."

"For the love of the force, this?"

"Not scary. At all."

Cleverlight fell forward onto the panel, face in her hands. Did _nothing _catch him off guard?

"The spider's new." He admitted, and Asajj's head shot up. She peeked cautiously around her shoulder, and spotted a small black spider, hanging from one thread right in front of Obi-wan's face. Minion shrugged. _I can work with this! _She leaned in closer towards him.

"Ah, yes. The spy-der. One bite from _arachnis deathicus _will cause immediate…" she never had to figure out what the harmless spider might do, because Obi-wan blew out the tiniest breath, causing the helpless little spider to swing forwards, landing right on Cleverlight's forehead. She froze, mouth open, eyes crossed, in a way that was almost comical.

"I got it!" Minion swung for the spider and hit Cleverlight on her gigantic head. She tumbled backwards with a comical shriek, and Obi-wan could not suppress a slight chuckle. This was so much better than hanging around with his new Padawan.

"Let's just get on to the part where we call in your precious apprentice." Cleverlight said dejectedly as she stood back up, one hand on her head, the other pointing accusingly at Kenobi. Unfortunately, one of the braindroids bit her outstretched finger, and she suddenly gained a lot more energy- She practically hopped around the room shouting, shaking the pesky braindroid in a futile attempt to make it release her leather-gloved hand.

Obi-wan smiled again despite his best efforts not to. The dramatic villainess and the concerned fish were quite a pair. "I think your inventions hurt you more than they hurt me, Ventress."

She froze, braindroid and all. Her voice suddenly dropped from 'excited shriek' to 'dramatic whisper'. "How do you know that name, Kenobi?"

"It used to be a common name. And I went to school with you, remember?"

"I don't know where you got that name, but it's not true. I'm Cleverlight, and no one else." She whisked away towards the control panel, shaking the braindroid off her hand. No more talk. Time to rain on Skywalker's parade. And blow up his floats, while she was at it.

**I was sorely tempted to name Cleverlight's death ray a death star, but it didn't quite work- that's more Anakin's forte, isn't it? ;)**


	7. Chapter 7: Revenge of chapter seven

**Pssht, I don't even have an author's note today! **

**If I owned Star Wars or Megamind, I would not be writing on a fanfiction site, now would I? **

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><p>"Put your hands in the air!" Anakin shouted, whizzing over the crowd of cheering people. They obeyed excitedly, leaping up towards him as though he could be caught. He grinned- handsomely!- and zipped lower, giving the overly excited citizens high fives. Ah, the power of fight. Being a hero was so <em>easy. <em>It would be stress-free too, if it weren't for that little brat Cleverlight.

"Alright, I just want to have a talk with all of you for a minute." He noticed Padme's face, smiling at him from amidst the screaming fans, and bit his lip. He could not pay any notice to her, mayor or no. They had agreed to keep their romance a secret so Padme wouldn't have to put up with aforementioned brat.

"I just want to say- getting a museum, and a statue, and having you guys all cheering…" he paused to let more applause die away. "But the best part of all this is getting to be _your _hero. And you know, I may not be an ordinary guy, with an ordinary life, but there's nothing I'd rather use my powers for then defending this glorious city!" The whole crowd burst out into screams again, but as Anakin soared higher, he felt a little bit of guilt. Heroes weren't supposed to lie, and he really did wish for an ordinary life once in a while.

Suddenly, high above him, he spotted one of those pesky braindroids. Cleverlight was spying, was she? Wait, there was another. And another! The whole place abounded in the little robots, and then the familiar electric guitar opening, and the black smoke filling the air, and then _her_ face was projected onto the large building walls.

"Mwahahahahaha! So you're giving this _hero_ a statue? She drew air quotes around 'hero'.

"Cleverlight. I should have known you'd crash this party." Anakin struggled to restrain his anger.

"Oho, I'm doing more than crashing it. I'm going to eat your cake too! I don't just want to rain on your parade; I want to blow up all your floats! I don't just want to… erm…" Oh, where _had _she been going with that? "And you and all of JedihTemple will be powerless to stop me!" She slapped on her favorite ending.

"It's Jedi Temple!" he protested, and the whole crowd cheered in agreement.

"Oh, potato tomato, tomato potato," she mocked, clearly unconcerned with her mispronunciation of her hometown. "You can call the place whatever you like, but once I capture it it'll be Cleverlight-opolis!"

"That's a horrible name."

"I haven't had time to make up anything better. I'm a bit busy… kidnapping your master!" The second screen switched from a second projection of Cleverlight sitting in her usual chair to one of Obi-wan Kenobi, tied to _his_ usual chair.

"Master! Don't panic!" Anakin yelled, gazing in horror as the crowd below his feet gasped. Seriously, was it that big of a surprise anymore? Obi-wan seemed to have caught on.

"I'm not panicking, Anakin. This is something of an everyday occurance."

"I _do not _kidnap you every day!" protested Cleverlight, glancing over her shoulder.

"Once again, it's an expression." He explained, rolling his eyes slightly. She spoke English as though it were her second language: she didn't catch on to expressions and phrases, sarcasm went right over her head, and she could barely be understood sometimes when she attempted to pronounce longer words.

"Either way, if you want your master back, _who would, _then youbetter get over here."

"I'm on my way, _Cleverlight." _

"You'll have to find us first!"

"We're in the abandoned observatory again." Obi-wan put in helpfully.

"Augh! No we're not, don't listen to him!" Asajj hurridly flipped the second screen back to another projection of herself, but she was too late- Skywalker had taken off.

She looked back over her shoulder. "Do you _mind?" _Obi-wan shot her a quick smirk.

"The Chosen one is on his way." Minion announced, as one of the monitors snapped to life, showing an image of Anakin, striding in midair, rapidly approaching them.

"Ha!"

"Ha ha." Cleverlight challenged.

"Ha ha _ha_ ha." If the villain wanted to play games, he'd gladly play along.

"Mwahahahahahahaha!" The look on her face clearly dared him to outdo that. "you and Skywalker are playing right into my hands!"

"You mean by _me _telling _him _to come _here _and destroy and _you, _I'm following your plan?"

"That is precisely what I mean, dearest. And soon Skywalker shall fall! _Any_ minute now." The screen showed him approaching, he was leaning forward, arms outstretched, ready to slam through the dome. Obi-wan tilted his face away, closing his eyes to keep out the dust… The screen showed Anakin smash through the dome, landing directly in the center of the observatory… But he wasn't there. Obi-wan stared around confused, and on screen, so did Anakin.

"Oh yes. You've both fallen straight into my trap. You, Skywalker, rely far too much upon your master."

"But, but how?" Obi-wan stammered. Could it just be an older video of Anakin? But he was walking around, confused. He'd never done that, had he?

"Appearances can be quite deceiving, Kenobi." He tore his eeys from the screen to look at the villain. Her red lips were pulled up into a confident smirk.

Anakin spoke first. "What kind of projections and videos have you got running this time, brat?"

"Oh, no projections. No trickery." She grinned.

"Then why…?" Obi-wan didn't know quite how to explain. How could they both be in the same place, yet not see eachother?

"Oh, good heavens!" Cleverlight exclaimed, her voice dripping with mock horror and surprise. "You didn't think you were in the _real _observatory, did you?" As she spoke, one of the panels of the dome slid open, and from his chair, Obi-wan could see the abandoned observatory- the place where his Padawan likely stood right now. He was in a fake one, obviously meant to trick him into telling Anakin where to go- How could he have fallen for it?

"And now you're trapped, Chosen One."

"I can't be trapped. I'm a physical representation of the belief of justice."

"ah, but who's to say that representations can't fail to represent what they're supposed to… er… represent? And even the best of beliefs can be _corroded _over time."

"Justiceand I are _non-corrosive_ metals."

"He's a metal now?" Minion asked, but no one really paid any attention to him- not Cleverlight or Chosen One, who were wrapped in their fight, nor the intently watching crowd, who stared at the walls of Chosen One museum as though they were at the movies.

"But any metal, even a non-corrosive one, can easily be melted by enough _heat,"_ Cleverlight smiled wider at the word, "Such as the wit hot heat of _revahnge!_"

"Anyone with a brain like yours _should _know that it's _white _hot heat, the stuff you're referring to is pronounced _revenge, _and the dish is best served cold." Obi-wan's eyebrow shot up. Since when was revenge edible?

"But you can reheat a cold dish. In the microwave of pure evil!"

"Yes, but that microwave appears to be broken just now."

"I'll get it repaired."

"Your warrenty is expired."

"I got an extended warrenty."

"Ah, but all warrenties, even extended ones, are _invalid _if you use the product for other then its intended purpose! And clearly, reheating revenge is _not _the intended purpose."

"But it is the purpose of a microwave of _evil!" _

"No respectable store sells those!"

Obi-wan was getting a bit bored of all this, and he was guessing all the citizens gathered outside the museum would be as well. "Ok, I concede that it's a draw. Can I go home now?" He smiled hopefully at Cleverlight, but resumed sulking when she spoke.

"Oh, you can leave, that is, if Chosen One can withstand the full, concentrated heat of _the sun! FIRE!" _She flung one hand dramatically out to the side, and the effect might have been good, had something actually happened. Instead, she stood, looking stupid, Anakin looking unimpressed, and Obi-wan looking slightly amused. "Oh, for the sake of all things evil…"

The citizens and their mayor watched as Anakin stared up, most likely at a projection of the same thing they saw in the other screen, with a look of absolute are-you-kidding-me? etched on his face. Cleverlight strode over to her sidekick. "Erm, Minion? Fire?" Her whisper was just loud enough to be heard by everyone. There were a few snickers from the crowd. Anakin remained 'unimpressed'.

"It's just warming up." The fsh explained.

"Come again?"

"Warming up."

"Warming up? The _sun _is _warming up_?"

"Well, sir, the ray takes a little time to…"

"I _told _you to have everything ready!" She sank back into her chair, dejected.

"Just admit it." Obi-wan piped up from where he remained tied. "Your plan is failing, as usual."

"Yeah, she's going to out and admit _that." _Minion complained.

Cleverlight removed her palm from her face to gaze in shock at her friend. "Whose side are you on here?"

"Cinteould someone stamp my frequent kidnapping card?" interrupted Obi-wan cheekily.

Cleverlight laughed almost nervously, rolling in closer to the prisoner. "You know that we discontinued that promotion, darling." Her voice was a whisper, and she rolled in closer, leaning forward… Her kneecaps hit something. His knees- she hadn't realized she was so close! She looked up quickly, and found that she was inches from his face. His blue eyes were filled with amusement. She hurridly moved away. "Minion, take this troublemaker back home." Minion, oblivious to the tension between his mistress and their prisoner, shook the can of knock-out spray vigorously.

"See you next Wednesday." The fish said cheerfully.

"Minon!" He was instantly whirled upon by the villain. "You can't tell the victim when we'll kidnap him next! "

"Oh, I have an important Council meeting that day. Can you make it Thursday?" He barely noticed Cleverlight's frustrated reaction, though, as something on the screen had caught his eye. Anakin was heading for the dome, ready to break out, but he _bounced back. _

"Blast hoth anyway!" he snapped, as he slammed into the metal and barely dented it. His efforts seemed to be getting weaker and weaker.

"What did he say?" Cleverlight peered at the screen, her attention captured.

"Bad hair day today?" guessed Minion.

"Pfft. Skywalker _never _has a bad hair day." She leaned in closer to the screen, projecting her eyes at an enomous size both on the insisde of the observatory dome and the wall of the museum, which was now almost forgotten by everyone involved. "What sort of trickery is this?"

"You've finally guessed it." Anakin had collapsed, panting. "You've discovered my one weakness."

"Erm…?"

"Clearly this dome is lined with… with… uhhhh…. A metal of some kind!"

"Point being?"

"You've discovered my one weakness!"

"I have? You mean you're de-fet-ed?"

"Erm, sir?" Minion interjected. Cleverlight ignored him.

"Metal… drains… my powers…" Chosen One gasped. He'd collapsed to the floor, panting with the effort of trying to break through the dome.

"What? That doesn't… That doesn't even make _sense."_

"Anakin?" Obi-wan called. He could barely see the screen, and his Padawan couldn't see him, but they could hear eachother. "Anakin, didn't you lift that big _metal_ building the other day?"

"Gah- Shhhh, Master!" He yelped. "Clearly this is a different kind of metal!"

"Alright Drama Queen, what are you yammering about?" Cleverlight snapped.

Minion tried again, gesturing wildly to the monitor next to him. "Sir, this is impor-"

"You're the only drama queen here, Cleverlight. You've discovered the one metal that weakens me. I'm not joking around, you win." There was actual defeat in his voice. She'd done it? She'd found a way to contain the Chose One?

"SIR!" poor grievous shrieked.

"What?" Cleverlight whipped away from the camera to face the fish.

"It's done warming up." That was the only warning anyone had. Ventress's death ray shot down, hitting the observatory. Anakin yelled something just as the camera went dead, and the whole place _exploded _in a ball of fire and smoke. A wave of force hit the fake observatory, sending Minion and Cleverlight toppling to the floor and giving Obi-wan's hair the 'windtunnel' look.

Slowly Cleverlight pulled herself to her feet, coughing. Her cape had been flung forward over her face, and her pale skin was sooty. Standing up, she peered out at the observatory. All that remained on the hilltop was charred debris and loads and loads of smoke. Even all the people at the museum, she realized, could see that smoke. The camera that had been in the dome was showing static now, and the fizzling that accompanied it was the only sound.

"Is he… gone?" Grievous had hauled himself up, wiping grime from the front of his dome so that he could see.

"I don't think so. We can't be too careful."

Suddenly Obi-wan gasped. "There!" Sure enough, a column of white smoke was rising from the blackness. "Chosen One." He sighed in relief.

"Yes, _Chosen One."_ Cleverlight snapped mockingly. Suddenly realizing what she'd said, she yelped "Chosen One!" and panicked. She and Minion spazzed for a moment, searching for some sort of escape, and then it was too late. Chosen One zipped into the room and landed in a heap on the floor.

Only it wasn't Anakin. It was his white-caped skeleton.

"Eeew-ugh-ah-get it off!" Ventress scrambled away from the bones, hiding behind a disgusted Minion. Obi-wan stared, horror-stricken. His Padawan. The empty eye-sockets gazed at him. Cleverlight. Hed never thought she could do something like this. ever.

She hadn't either. "What… did I just do?" She whispered, so soft that the broadcaster didn't pick it up.

"You did it, sir." Minion answered, awe-stericken.

"I did it?"

"You did it!"

"I did it! I killed Chosen One!" The crowd outside the museum let out a cry of desperation. Without Chosen One, what would they do? Their hero lay dead! "do you realize what this _means _Minion?" Cleverlight was shocked, but happy. "JedihTemple is mine!"

**Up next, we see Asajj's reign over 'JedihTemple', as well as the reactions of the still-living characters. **

**Reveiwers recieve a microwave of pure evil! (But no respectable store sells those!)**


	8. Chapter 8: Creative chapter name, eh?

**Kinda short, but contains an amusing scene about telephones.**

***does not own***

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><p>Obi-wan was numb with shock. Cleverlight had released him, and he'd walked home. Anakin dead? The idea seemed so impossible. And he'd known Cleverlight wasn't evil, but he'd just been proven wrong. She was bad to the core.<p>

Most importantly, it was _his fault. _He'd told Anakin to go to the observatory, and that had been a death trap.

Cleverlight, meanwhile, began preparing her grand triumph over JedihTemple. She considered taking over the Temple itself, but it housed a lot of Jedi, Jedi she would then have to rehome. Besides, the Temple wasn't even where things were run from. City hall would be her conquest. Time to make some phone calls.

"Hello, city hall, can I help you?"

Ventress cleared her throat and used her most dangerous voice. "Yes, this is Clverlight. I'd like to-" She stopped speaking, as the secretary had screeched and Asajj was pretty sure the phone had hit the floor. "Oh for crying out loud! What must one do to get some service? I only conquered the city, is that not enough these days?"

"Hello, erm, Cleverlight, this is Mayor Amidala speaking."

"Oh, excellent, just who I was looking for. You don't live in city hall, do you?"

"No." The other woman's voice sounded weary and wavering. Geez, was losing her job that upsetting? Maybe it was the death of the town hero?

"Ooo-K. Soooooo, I'd like you to have your stuff out of your, I mean, _my _new office by, say, nine tonight."

Minion piped up from behind her. "Better make it eight, that way she's not moving stuff out during our grand entrance."

"Oh yes. Make it eight!"

The only response was a cool, calm voice stating, "Please deposit another quarter to continue your phone call."

"Oh, for crying out loud…." Cleverlight rummaged in her pocket- a hard task considering she was crammed in a phone booth with a cyborg. She dropped a quarter in the slot, then yelped into the phone, "hello? Did you hear me?"

"I'll have everything out." Padme sighed.

"Goody! I mean, er, good! And if I find a single thing left, I'll… uh… goodbye!" Cleverlight slammed the phone down.

"I'd say that went pretty well." Minion grinned.

"Yes. Remind me again why we have to use the blasted phone booth?"

"Because we don't have a phone, sir."

"Hm. Remind me to get one of those. Now let's get out of this little box and plan our grand entrance! Ow!" She flung her hands dramatically in the air as she said 'entrance', but the little phone booth wasn't built for that kind of movement, especially with a scrawny, large-caped, overly-dramatic, big-headed alien and a large, metal-bodied, bulky alien fish in it.

"What do you suppose would happen if we dehydrated the box with us in it?"

"Gah! Minion! Now is not the time to experiment!"

Meanwhile, at the temple, the Jedi mourned their fallen hero.

"Here we put to rest a true fallen hero." Shaak began.

"No, don't say it like that." Adi sniffled. "He's not fallen. Just dead."

"Obi-wan would know what to say, if he were here." Aayla stated, and everyone nodded solemnly.

"Well, why don't we call him and tell him to get his lazy butt downstairs?" Everyone glared at Hannah. Obi-wan's new Padawan certainly had a knack for getting on people's bad side. "Well… he's missing his Padawan's funeral."

"Give him some space." Kit Fisto sighed. "He wasn't prepared for this."

"No one was." Adi sniffed again.

Shaak cleared her throat and tried once more to deliver her speech. "Skywalker risked his life over and over in a desperate attempt to save all of us-"

"We do have lightsabers, right? So…" Plo stopped.

"This is Cleverlight we're talking about." Mace rubbed his forehead. "She's dangerous."

"Ahem!" Shaak waited until the others were looking at her to continue. "An attempt which ended up taking his life from-" Desperate wailing broke out among the younger Padawans in the back of the room. Shaak's temper broke. "Do you _mind?_ I'm only giving a funeral address here!" She looked back down at the top of the smooth, wooden coffin. "Taking his life from him. Goodbye."

The Padawans wailed more as the coffin was taken from the room.

Obi-wan could hear them from his apartment several floors above. _This _was why he had not wanted to go to the funeral. With the council in charge and weeping Padawans in attendance, the event would end a disaster. He most certainly did plan on attending Cleverlight's little meeting tonight. Curiousity had always been a problem of his, and he was going to find out her plans in any way possible.

"Alright Minion. Do I look evil?"

"Stunningly bad, sir." The fish replied, sweeping his gaze over her. She had composed an outfit consisting of brand new boots, black leather of course, with rows of silver spikes up the sides and platforms on the bottom, naturally, as Cleverlight liked feeling tall; black shorts underneath a silky black skirt with long slits up the side, perfect for showing off the silver spikes on her boots! Her belt was slung crookedly across her narrow hips, she'd put on a clean shirt, her gloves were bright blue today, and her cape was a magnificent work of art that he'd designed himself. The collar was overly tall, but the cape was short enough for dancing through the streets without dragging. Her typical blue print graced the inside, and more black silk was on the outside. And of course, no look was complete without the glowing ruby pendant.

"Excellent! Now, let's go announce to the world our vic-tohry!"

"Victory, sir. Accent on the 'vic'."

"Pfff. I don't care what they think about my pro-noun-cia-tai-chun. I'm their new evil overlord! Now, black eyeliner, or blue?"

"Black sir- it really brings out your lashes. But if you add a _touch_, just a _touch, _of blue shadow, it ties in your cape."

"Minion, you are the bestest at everything." Two braindroids moved forward and gracefully applied her blue shadow.

"Best, sir.

"… I knew that."

The crowd stood around outside city hall, shuffling their feet and waiting for their new overlord to come out and speak to them. The doors in front of them remained shut, the podium dismally villain-free. Obi-wan paced, checking his watch. It was most unlike his kidnapper to be late. Presentation was of the utmost importance to her- it was just about the only thing she could do right. Well, it had been. Now she'd "succeeded", and his Padawan was dead. He should hate her, any Jedi would hate a woman who had kidnapped him for years, killed his Padawan, and took over his city. But he'd seen something in her face today, as she looked down at Anakin's skeleton. She hadn't really _expected _to kill him.

Overall, she'd seemed to accept that she was a failure, and she wasn't going to let being a failure stop her from being a fabulous villainess. He hated to admit it, but that kind of attitude was downright attractive. But more than that, her mind was… intrigueing. She was so smart, yet she overlooked such obvious things- she was scattered, forgetful, and… pretty darn socially enept.

The crickets were suddenly drowned out by the loud notes of an electric guitar- Ventress's personal theme song. He suspected that she'd composed it herself, but he really wasn't sure. There came the dark smoke, billowing up not from city hall, but the street behind them. The bright lights of the braindroids were zipping in and among the dark smoke, swirling around a two darker outlines- Here she came.

Cleverlight skipped out of the smoke, and yet she managed to make skipping look _bad. _Well, good. But bad at the same time. She danced up the stairs to the platform, Minion following behind, carrying a boombox that was as large as Cleverlight herself. Minion slapped the front of the bombox to silence it, but the music kept playing. And playing. Minion was pressing the button for 'stop' over and over, yet it didn't. Minion finally punched the front of the boombox so gard that it broke and stopped playing.

"Well!" Cleverlight began. "I'm surpri-"

Minion's punch to the boombox had set it off balance, and it began to fall. Minion didn't let go, so with a desperate yelp of surprise, he toppled over.

Cleverlight stared at him for a moment. The crickets had begun again.

"I'm okay!" put in Minion loudly as he got back up.

"Anyway. I'm surprised to see so many of you here. I, uh, just wanted to welcome you to my reign as evil overlord." Her eyes scanned the crowd. That was a lot of people. A hand shot up in the back. "Yes? What's your question?"

The owner of the hand pushed his way to the front of the crowd. Oh, blast it, it was Obi-wan. His hair was still messed up. "I'd like to know what you plan to do with all of us. And our city."

"That's, um, a good question. Really good, actually." Oh wow. What _was_ her plan for the city?

As Obi-wan watched her search for an answer, a voice behind him whispered, "Hey Master." He whirled to see Hannah, gazing at him as though he were water in a desert.

"Shhh." He muttered, eyes glued back to Cleverlight, who had begun to speak.

"Well. Take the most awful, hideous, terrible thing you can think of."

"Standing right in front of me." Hannah muttered. Obi-wan elbowed her.

"Now subtract one-third of the happiness, and add in the square root of depression and evil. Now take the whole thing times _six!" _Cleverlight announced with a ridiculous grin. Obi-wan stared in disbelief. _This is not an answer, Ventress. I expected something better from you._

"So. Um, For now, let's just get on with normal, everyday stuff, and… I'll get back to you. Thank-you-and-goodnight!" She yelped the last bit and sprinted for the door or city _hall_. Minion followed, slamming the door behind him. And that was that. Obi-wan headed back to the temple, Hannah trailing behind, yammering about how she could have designed a far better entrance, Cleverlight was so hideous, too bad Chosen one wasn't here to kill her, blah blah blah.

"Hey, do you want to hang out?" She blurted.

"No, not right now, okay?" Seriously? He'd just lost his old Padawan, and she had the nerve to ask him this?

"Ok. Tomorrow?"

"…I'll get back to you." He stole a trick from the town villain and darted into the temple building. He ran through the halls until he found his apartment, and slammed the door behind him. Obi-wan sank into his favorite chair. _Oh, Cleverlight. What have you done? And why do I care…?_

Inside the main office of City Hall, Cleverlight stopped and stared. The ceiling was high, like the ceiling in her lair. As she turned on the lights, a large hanging light in the center of the room, shaped to look like it held candles rather than electric lights, sparked to life, illuminating the magnificent place. The walls were a pale green, the ceiling white, and the carpet- carpet!- was a deep luxurious sort of red. A deep brown wood desk was against the far wall, and behind it was, to her amazement, a huge monitor, for some reason set to display a picture of the city gardens at night.

"Look at it all, Minion! The light… It's supposed to look like lots of little candles…"

"That'd be a 'chandelier' sir."

"chan-dee-ler. Amazing. And this!" She darted across the room and pressed her blue-gloved hands against the dark screen. "It's like the monitors in the lair. But it only seems to have one station…"

"That's a 'window' sir."

"Window." Cleverlight repeated, awed. "Like a windshield, but in a wall."

"It certainly is. You can see the gardens from here."

"Minion, do you know what this means?"

"er… we can watch the fireflies in the park?"

"No! Well, yes, that too. We're _in _city hall! We've won it all Minion! The whole city is ours! We can do _whatever we want! _And no one can stop us!"

**Ventress is definately getting into the whole "Evil Overlord" idea... don't ask how she can be an evil over_lord_ when she's a she. The idea has never entered her over-sized head. Obi-wan's curiousity has come alive, so next he does a bit of snooping, and Cleverlight does whatever she wants, with no one stopping her.**


	9. Chapter 9: The chapter unfolds

**Ventress and Greivous have it all. And yet they have nothing... **

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><p>The first few days had been a whirlwind of endless fun. Ventress and Grievous had stolen whatever took their fancy and then piled their loot around city hall. Jewelry, statues, artwork, interesting gadgets, books, furniture, and various shiny objects filled the room. Cleverlight was sleeping in an actual bed now, instead of just the sofa in the lair. She had replaced the non-spinning, non-rolling, non-reclining chair in the office with a new, black leather model.<p>

The city had been decorated with quite a bit of blue spray paint, but that had become less fun after a few days. Then she'd resorted to terrorizing Jedi with the new red sabers she'd stolen; she had decided that the red glow matched her pendant nicely. Minion couldn't decide if he wanted green or blue, so he ended up with two of each. Eventually the Jedi just huddled stupidly in the Temple, which wasn't amusing in any way. Kenobi was nowhere to be seen. She took over the local radio station for an hour or so and blared her favorite songs, but this too grew tiring.

It was only a week from her conquer that she realized the simple truth: Taking over the city hadn't made her happy at all. It made her bored. There was simply no _chah-lahnge _to ruling the city. No extravagant gadgets to build. No Kenobi to capture. No Chosen One to provoke. No dangerous battles to engage in.

It was only afternoon, only two in the afternoon, and she was bored. She sat behind the wooden desk, playing with a funny little gadget, turning the crank to watch the blocks of wood whirl in bizarre patterns. It was something she'd stolen because it interested her, and now that she'd figured out how it worked, the only thing left to do was stare at the little blocks lost in their complicated dance patterns. Minion was out, searching the city for more statues for his collection.

"Cleverlight?" Asajj's head shot up. Who…? _No._ How had the nosy Jedi gotten in here?

"Kenobi! How on Croissant did you get in here?" The Jedi was peering in the doors on the other side of the room.

"The front door was unlocked." _Minion… Why was a simple thing like, "lock the door" so hard to remember? _"And this planet is called 'Corausant'. A croissant is-"

"I know what a croissant is," Ventress snapped, frustrated. "Better question. _Why _are you here?"

"I was curious as to what you're really up to. You haven't spray-painted anything or terrorized anyone for the past few days." This had to be the dumbest thing he'd ever done. But she never _had _told him what her plan for this city was, and he intended to weasel it out of her. And discovering the door ulocked had been too much of a temptation for him to resist.

"I'll spray-paint what I feel like and when I feel like it. Do you have any idea, Kenobi, what I do to people who come poking into my business? I am a villain, and there is no more Chosen One here to save you." She stood up dramatically, drawing both the sabers. To be honest, she didn't know how to work them except turning them on and using them like large glowsticks, but they were fairly intimidating.

"Ventress, you can quit threatening me. I know you won't hurt me."

The truth finally hung between them, in the air over the desk, open for them both to hear. Both knew it, but…

Her eyes narrowed. "Do you have any idea who _I _am? I'm not who you think I know. I'm not the same stupid little girl you knew in high school." She paused to take a breath. "I'm evil."

"I don't think so. I've been right there with you during every one of your attacks. You're like you used to be- you're lonely, you're hated, and you think you're bad. So you play the villain." Kenobi had come right up to the edge of the desk and leaned over it slightly.

Asajj was not one to back down from a challenge. She dropped both sabers and leaned over the desk from her side. "You don't get it Kenobi. I don't _think _I'm bad. I _am _bad."

Obi-wan moved in a little closer. "No. I understand perfectly, Darling."

"I don't know what you're talking about," the alien retorted, although she too leaned further across the desk towards her opponent, her hands resting on the polished surface.

"No, you don't. But I understand. You won't hurt me." They were eye to eye now, and somehow Ventress had stopped viewing him as her adversary and more as… as…

It was hard to tell who moved in first, but somehow they kissed, leaning over that desk, in city hall, at two in the afternoon.

As soon as they'd pulled apart, Ventress sat down hard in the chair behind her, staring at Obi-wan stupidly. _Awkward. So, so awkward. How had this happened? And why did she enjoy it so much?_

"That was… un-ex-pact-edd."

"It… was." Kenobi hadn't really planned this at all. She'd just come in close, like she used to do sometimes when he was tied up, and he wasn't tied up, but free to move. He remembered briefly when her lips had brushed his ear once, as she leaned in for a dramatic whisper; she'd jerked away mid-word. To be honest, he didn't know why she hadn't jerked away from him now. "So, Cleverlight, if you're so evil, what exactly _are _your plans for this city?"

_Oh ho, so _that _was what he was after… _"I dunno. I haven't figured it out yet." It wasn't a very good response, but it was all she could think of right then.

"You… don't know?" She was the master plan-maker. How could she not know?

"Well excuse me for not having every detail planned in advance! I didn't exactly foresee this happening!" She snapped.

"You really didn't expect to win that day, did you?" His voice was suddenly quiet.

"No."

"So, do you regret it?" He asked softly, barely believing what he was saying.

"No." Cleverlight asserted.

"You don't regret killing my Padawan." He stated, frustrated. He got the idea she was insisting she didn't regret it just to be stubborn. She was too proud to admit a mistake. Ever.

"No! I don't regret anything I've ever done in my life- except for _that." _She gestured to the space above the desk. "That was stupid."

"I should have known." He muttered, taking a few steps back. "You know, every time I reach out to you, you just shove me away. I don't know why I bother anymore." Obi-wan walked out without a backward glance. He was the stupid one. But she was so alone, and… and oh so fascinating. But she wanted nothing to do with him. Fine. He didn't need her.

"No… wait…" She stammered, but he'd already disappeared from her office and from her life. _Why oh why do I mess these things up? Last time he offered to be my friend, I rejected him. Now he comes in here, trying again to treat me like I'm a person and not dirt, and what do I do? I screw it all up. I really can't do _anything _right…_

**Poor Cleverlight is too proud to admit that she doesn't really like ruling the city... and that she does like Obi-wan.  
>Good fireworks in this chapter, eh?<strong>


	10. Chapter 10: Yet another chapter

**The beginnings a little depressing, but don't skip this chappie! Major important plot development! K?**

**For those of you wondering, the gadget Cleverlight plays with in the last chapter is called a "Kentucky-do-nothing", and the song in this chapter is one I made up to be in "Shadow", and it's just called "The Way it was on Tatooiene". **

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><p>"It's been a week since we lost Chosen One, but he'll always be in our hearts. We miss you Chosen One. And I have just one thing to say to Cleverlight: I hope you're happy. This is Obi-wan Kenobi, reporting live from outside Chosen One museum." Obi-wan drew a finger across his throat, and Aayla stopped rolling. It was a bit harsh, but after what Cleverlight had done… and he only had his own stupidity to blame.<p>

"Obi-wan? Corausant to Obi-wan?" Aayla waved one hand in front of his face. "You want to ride back with me, or walk?"

The Temple wasn't far, and to be honest, he'd prefer a little alone time. "No thanks Aayla. I feel like a walk."

"Alright. See you tomorrow."

"Goodnight." As Aayla climbed into the news van, he suddenly noticed Hannah approaching. "Wait, Aayla I changed my mind!" he yelped. But she'd already pulled away. Leaving him. Alone. With Hannah. Oh Force…

"Hey Master. Finished with your broadcast? You better be, because, your camera just left. So… what are you up to?"

"I'm just walking home, which is what you should be doing. It's late."

"Well yeah, but… I was thinking. Do you want to come to my place for a party?"

"Um…. I'd really prefer to be alone right now." _Don't you understand this? I just lost my Padawan, and, arrogant as he was, I'm a bit upset right now. Plus Cleverlight hates me more than I thought she did. And I… care for her more than I thought I did. But she's the one who's killed Anakin. So why do I care about her emotions at this point?_

"Ah, come on. I already got everything set up." Hannah smiled widely.

"Actually, I just wanted to go in the museum… I'd like to have a look around." Obi-wan lied.

"So, can I come with you?"

"Won't your other guests be waiting?"

"What other guests?"

"At the party."

"There aren't any. That's the best part, Master! Just you and me, with a whole party all to ourselves."

Kenobi took a deep breath. "Look. I really want to be by myself. I'll see you, tomorrow. Ok?"

"Ok, Ok. I'm heading home now Master." She left in a bit of a huff, and he noticed her kicking the garbage at her feet. The city really was becoming a dump- Jedi were usually in charge of cleanup, and they were holed up in the Temple as though they were afraid Cleverlight would shoot them with her death ray if they came out. Foolish really, as she could just shoot the _Temple _if she wanted them dead.

Obi-wan slowly ascended the steps of the museum, gazing at the large statue before him. _Oh, Anakin. Why can't I go back to when you were still my Padawan, and when Cleverlight lost, and the whole world was right?_

"And I have just one thing to say to Cleverlight: I hope you're happy. This is Obi-wan Kenobi, reporting live from outside Chosen One museum." Asajj Ventress could easily see the pain, disappointment, and anger on Kenobi's face, even just watching the moniter on her desk. _Oh Obi-wan. I'm _not_ happy. Why can't I go back to when I kidnapped you, and Skywalker fought me, and I lost, and the whole world was right?_

At this moment, Minion burst through the office's double doors, singing loudly and using a large, most likely priceless statue as his 'guitar'. "Oh Yeah! That's the way it is on Tatooiene! Tatooiene! Yeah!" He finished his favorite song triumphantly, glancing up at 'sir'.

"Minion, I'm not in the mood for singing." Cleverlight sighed, staring into the empty screen where Kenobi's hurt face had been a moment before. Minion dropped the statue with a slam, then clanked to the desk.

"You don't look all that happy, mistress."

"We have everything we could ever want. And yet… Why do I feel so… empty?"

"Empty?"

"melen-klee."

"I'm sorry, what?"

"Sad." She sighed again. "Empty."

"We could… kidnap Obi-wan Kenobi! That always cheers you up!" Not even Minion's eager smile could make her feel happy now. And seeing Obi-wan again was the last thing she wanted.

"No. Without Skywalker… there's no real point." That phrase stuck out to her. _Without Skywalker… do _I_ have a point? Does anything I do have a point anymore? _She turned around in her chair to look out across the gardens. Beyond the plants and stretches of grass, one building remained lit. Chosen One Museum was still open for the evening. "Minion, I'm going out for a stroll."

"Do you… want me to come with?"

"No, you can stay here, and go about whatever it is you were doing. I just want to get away from this office for a while."

Grievous could tell that something was wrong with his boss, but he didn't want to press it. "Alright Sir. I think I'm just going to sleep for a while." With that, the complicated suit whirred slowly down and was still, and Grievous settled himself against the bottom of his fishbowl.

Cleverlight slowly walked up the front stairs of the museum, through the doors, and into the West elevator. The statue before her brought back so many memories of that day, the day she'd interrupted the unveiling ceremony. The elevator opened onto a large, circular track that allowed people to view the statue from every angle- not that it mattered, as the statue revolved anyway.

Obi-wan, deep in thought as the East elevator rose slowly, was startled out of his thoughts as he came out of the elevator and abruptly slammed into someone.

"Oh, I'm sorry, I should have been paying better attention." He stammered.

"Yes, you should have." The woman before him agreed, voice and eyes dull. She pushed a large cart of books and paintings, and Obi-wan guessed she worked here. He'd met her before, somewhere, most likely here at the museum.

"Brittany, right?" He asked, struggling to be polite.

"Brianna." She intoned.

"Right. So, my deepest apologies for being so clumsy…"

"I'm not supposed to insult museum guests. But yes, you're clumsy." _Geez… someone's a bit cranky today._

"I'll try to be _less _clumsy than." He finished, walking away.

"Keep trying." Brianna muttered under her breath.

Cleverlight leaned against the railing, gazing at Skywalker's face. He'd certainly been no friend to her, but there was something kind of nice about how he didn't fear her. Everyone else ran away from her, as though she were a monster. Maybe she was. "I… didn't mean to kill you, Skywalker. I realy didn't." The alien spoke quietly. "I didn't mean to upset Kenobi, either. But it's just that… I had so many plans for battles with you. Fights we won't be able to have now. So… I hope you don't hold this against me, the fact that I'm blowing up your museum. It's just… too many memories, right out my window." With that, she flicked open the control box and dropped it over the edge. It fell to Skywalker's feet, where she'd already piled quite a bit of explosives. Now she just had three minutes to get out of the building… "Goodbye, Skywalker."

Obi-wan, too had been talking to the statue, to himself, to Anakin, and his head shot up. Had he heard… a voice? "Hello?" He called, hesitantly moving farther along the circle. "Is someone there?"

Cleverlight jumped. Obi-wan! She couldn't let him see her here, not after what had happened only a few hours ago! She took off in the other direction.

"Hello?" Obi-wan followed the sound of footsteps, wondering who else would be here so late.

Asajj stared back over her shoulder, hoping she could get to the elevator before Obi-wan caught up with her and- OOF! She slammed straight into the front of a cart of books.

"That costume is just ridiculous," sighed a woman she hadn't even noticed before. "Cleverlight doesn't look anything like that."

"Who's there?"Obi-wan was getting closer! She didn't have time to waste with this so-called expert who thought she was only a costume, and a bad one at that. Ventress scanned the woman with her watch, shot her with the dehydration gun, and transformed herself to look like the curator just as Obi-wan came running into view.

"Oh. Brianna, it's just you." Obi-wan gasped, relieved. No voices in his head, he wasn't going crazy _just _yet.

"Ye-es. It's me. Bree-ah-nah." Cleverlight managed to get out. "You may want to get out of here in the next two minutes and thirty-seven seconds. We're doing a bit of rena-vate-ing." Asajj slammed the elevator button, panicking, and stepped in when it opened.

"Oh. I'll…" The door to the elevator was beginning to close… "I'll catch a ride down with you." He stopped the door with his foot and hopped in next to her.

Cleverlight wished more than she had ever wished for anything that the elevator would move faster. Her eyes flickered to Obi-wan and then quickly away again, but he didn't notice, thankfully. His eyes were on the statue before them.

"I kept thinking he'd escape at the last second." He sighed. Probably not a good idea to speak to Brianna, but he wanted to break the silence.

"Yeah. I, uh, I did too." Cleverlight was trying to sound calm, collected.

"Brianna, are you alright?" Oh, force, Obi-wan had noticed that she wasn't.

"It's just that, with Chosen One gone, there's no one left to challenge Cleverlight. No one to stop her."

The elevator doors opened. Obi-wan's hand found her shoulder as they walked out. "As long as there is evil, good will rise to stop it. I mean, it's like they always say. Heroes aren't born, they're made."

An idea sparked in Cleverlight's mind. "Heroes can be made?" _If heroes can be made, then... The world can go back to the way it was!_

"Of course! Obi-wan exclaimed, beginning to warm up to the idea. "You just need the right ingrediants! Courage, determination, a sense of justice- why, anyone could be a hero!"

"Yes!" Asajj exclaimed eagerly, her sadness gone.

Suddenly she found that she'd reached out her hands to Kenobi's shoulders. To her surprise, however, he accepted it gladly, grabbing her around the waist and twirling her around the room. His smile lit his face now, so unlike how he'd looked in the broadcast only a few minutes ago. Brianna's black hair came loose from its tight updo and swirled down around her face, and with the addition of a delighted smile, and the light in her green eyes, Obi-wan thought, she was quite pretty.

"I think we should get out of here now." She stated abruptly, and she and Obi-wan left the building at a run, hands still clasped.

"I'll call you!" Obi-wan announced as he climbed into the backseat of a taxi- he didn't feel like walking sadly home in the dark anymore. Brianna had completely lifted his spirits, and from the looks of it, she was feeling better too.

"Bye!" She grinned at him as the cab pulled away. "It's time to put the past behind me." she announced to no one in particular as she twisted the watch, regaining her normal form. "Only the future holds the potential of-" **BOOM. **Oh riiiiiight... the explosives...

"Augh! Too close! Forgot about that!" Cleverlight yelped, scurrying out of the way of falling chunks of museum. "Why do I always stand too close?"


	11. Chapter 11: Chapter that comes after ten

**Cleverlight sets her new plan into motion a little quicker than she would have prefered to... and Obi-wan finds her secret lair, 'cause he's nosy like that.**

**Just a little reminder, I dont own Megamind or Star Wars, so please don't sue me.**

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><p>"Make a hero?" Minion asked quizzically.<p>

"Yes, my aquatic friend!" Cleverlight declared, madly scribbling on a sheet of bright red paper. "I was walking last night when it came to me-" she ceased writing to look dramatically into the air, as though stricken by an idea- "Heroes can be made!" _Ok, so it didn't exactly come to me just like that…but it's sort of true._

"Ok, ok, assuming that heroes can be made, which I'm… not… _entirely _sure of yet, WHY would you want to make a hero? I mean, we finally won! We finally have it all! A hero would only mess things up."

"But Minion, don't you understand?" She grabbed another sheet of paper, a yellow one, and tore it in half. "I'm one half without the other. Evil without good to fight me. It's like a yin, with no yang." She held up the split sheet to demonstrate, then through it over her shoulder. Both halves fluttered to the already paper-covered floor. "Ask me how I'm going to make a hero, Minion! Ask me!"

Grievous could tell from the start that this wasn't going to work out well, but he sighed. "How are you going to make a hero?" His voice lacked enthusiasm.

Ventress strode across the room and pulled out a piece of white silk with a flourish, looking actually a bit irritated at having to touch it. "Do you know what this is?"

"Erm…"

"One of ChosenOne's old capes! Do you know what that means?"

"Will you please stop asking me if I know what you're doing? Because really… I have no clue."

"There's a flake of dandruff here. Do you know what- oh, sorry. It means we have Skywalker's DNA! And we can use that DNA to extract the source of his power! Then we can give that power to another human, one we can train to become the new hero, and my new nemesis!"

"A new… Listen, sir, I _really _think this is a bad idea."

"Exactly! I'ts phen-oh-nom-in-alley _bad! _And evil! So, so very evil."

"No, no. Not bad as in evil, bad as in not good."

"Yes. Not good. We don't like good, Minion."

"No! Not bad as in evil, not bad as in not good, bad as in, as in…"

Cleverlight was warming up to the idea. "An extra-vag-antly evil idea for the greater good of bad! Oh, this is so exciting!"

"Bad as in… bad as in it's going to blow up in your face?"

"Don't be ridiculous Minion. Superheroes don't blow up."

The poor fish sighed.

"Now…" Cleverlight whispered dramatically, gazing down at the sleek, oversized gun in her hands, the gun with the power to endow ChosenOne's powers upon whoever was shot, "we only need to find a human. One who puts the good of others above their own. One who holds the welfare of the city high in their hearts! One who-"

A preppy little jingle filled the room. Ventress wrinkled her nose. "What… is that awful sound? Seriously. Where is it coming from?"

"It seems to be coming from… This little gadget?" Minion held the offending rectangle in the air.

Asajj recognized it at once. That Brianna person's telephone! "Erm… Hello?" she asked hesitantly. The phone continued to play the disgustingly happy music.

"I think you need to flip it _open, _sir."

"Hello?"

"Brianna? It's me, Obi-wan." Ventress nearly had a heart attack.

"Yes, this is… Brianna." She mimicked his pro-noun-cia-tation of the name.

"I thought I'd call to thank you about last night."

"About….?"

"You really inspired me." _Oh, he was so cute!_

"You inspired me too." She purred, elbowing Minion away so it would be harder for him to eavesdrop.

"And I just wanted to ask if you'd be interested in joining me in my search for information on Cleverlight's latest scheme. I'm sure you'd be very helpful."

"Minion it's mine!" She hissed under her breath, pushing him further from the phone. She hadn't yet told him about her late night meet-up with Kenobi, and she didn't plan to.

Kenobi's slightly muffled voice paused. "What was that?"

"I just said I'd be thrilledto help you out." She rushed. "So. So, how's the search going?"

"I'd say pretty good. I found her secret lair."

"HOW DID HE FIND MY EVIL LAIR?" She practically screamed, startling Grievous. The poor villainess turned around slowly, and sure enough, Kenobi was all over the security monitors. _Oh Force, he's _right _outside… Oh Force, he probably heard me yelling that…_

"Erm, how _did_ you find her evil lair?"

"I can't believe how obvious it is, once you think about it. It has a fake _observatory _on the roof!"

_Oh. Wow. I seriously didn't see that coming? Why the _hoth _didn't I take that thing down?_

Obi-wan gasped from the other end of the phone. "There's a doormat here that says 'secret entrance'!"

Cleverlight would admit to herself that leaving the dome atop their fortress had been her mistake. But she was most certainly not the one who had left out a _doormat _that said _secret _entrance! "Minion…"

"I kept forgetting where it was…" He smiled sheepishly.

"Oh, I don't have _time _for this!" Cleverlight pushed Minion into the closet nearby, pressing the infusing ray into his metal arms. She slammed the doors shut, hoping that would keep both Minion and her latest creation safe from Kenobi's prying eyes. The thought cloud! The cards, turning slightly from the breeze created by her over-excited movements, hung in clear view! She grabbed a purple silky curtain and drew it across the room. It'd have to do.

"What's that?" Speaking of Kenobi, his voice could be heard loud and clear from the phone in her hand.

"Er, nevermind, I was talking to… a street vendor. Yeah." Ventress flicked the watch to disguise herself, then ducked behind a shelf to wait until he passed her. As soon as she saw him, she joined in step with him from behind.

Obi-wan glanced from his phone to her. "How did you get here so fast?"

"I happened to be… speed walking nearby when you called me."

Obi-wan ran his eyes over her. She appeared to be wearing what she had been last night- same neatly-ironed black pants, same pale green top. Perhaps she simply hadn't changed since yesterday, or perhaps she owned more, identical outfits. Odd, but nothing to be concerned about, really.

"Now, let's see what we can find in here before Cleverlight figures out I found her 'secret' entrance. Honestly. I'd think with brains like hers…"

"Yes, well, you know, geniuses can get a bit… scatterbrained, I guess." _Or their minions…Oh, he is _so _dead. _

Kenobi was looking around the liar, which was a lot bigger than he'd remembered. "Where should we start?"

"How about over there? That door looks exciting."

"It says 'exit'."

"Which is short for exciting, right?" Obi-wan chuckled.

_Why can't it be short for exciting? _Cleverlight thought. _That's why that sign is there. It's exciting. _

Kenobi abruptly grabbed the purple silk and flung it aside. There wasn't much to see behind the curtain- bookshelves, a large closet, quite a few of the gadgets he recognized… But there, hanging in the middle of the room, was the most confusing jumble he'd ever seen. Red, yellow, and white cards hung sporadically from the ceiling, all at different heights and depths. A few blue ones were mixed in around the edges, and, to make it all even more confusing, all of them were written on. Force! How was he supposed to decode all this?

Ventress struggled with herself. Kenobi could not be staring at all this! She felt as though the contents of her brain were on display- writing, cards… and she _may_ have doodled a few little hearts on a few of those cards. For no real reason.

Obi-wan had pulled a small camera out of his pocket and was clicking away. "I could really use your help deciphering all this. I mean, your work at the museum must make you very knowledgeable about our town villain." Funny, how 'town villain' sounded perfectly normal, just like 'town barber' would to most people.

"Of course. I know… lots about Cleverlight. So much, it's scary." _Oh, I know more about Cleverlight then you know, Kenobi…_

"Hang on a minute, I'm going to get a few pictures from another angle…"

Asajj leaned away from him for a second to whisper in her watch. "Minion! Code, tell the braindroids to get in here!"

"Sir, there's no point to a code if you're just going to say what you want me to do. I mean, you could just skip the whole 'code' thing and-"

"Code: just do it!" The fish most likely rolled his eyes, but a few seconds later, a few of the excited robots whizzed into the room towards Obi-wan. At that very moment, he crouched down to get the cloud from a lower angle, the braindroids flew right over his head, and Cleverlight was swept off her feet by the metal cloud. A few more missed, hitting the closet Minion hid in. As it wobbled dangerously, the doors flew open and the gun skidded out.

"No!" yelped the fish, as his metal suit hit the ground. He reached forward, but the closet slammed down on top of him, trapping him under and inside the closet.

"No, it's me! It's Mommy! Put me down you metal idiots!" she hissed under her breath, twisting the watch dial to regain her true form. Her little droids let out buzzes of 'yes, sir', 'yes, sir' as they released her. _Augh… remind me again why I wanted to create AI?_

Brianna! Obi-wan took off after the little robots that had taken her, but they were too fast for him. He whipped around a corner, and there, lying on the floor was a ray gun of some sorts. He snatched it up- why not? Unexpectedly he heard a thump, and looked up to see Cleverlight hauling herself up from the floor.

"Where's Brianna?" He wouldn't cave to Cleverlight, now or ever again. Obi-wan aimed the gun right at her, moving forward. "What have you done with her?"

_Ok, Ventress, just go with it… _"I'm doing… horrible things to her. Torturing her. With, you know, lasers, spikes, the works." Asajj grinned evilly, counting on her famous look of pure evil to cover the way her mind was working overtime, trying to figure out how the hoth she'd get out of this one.

"Let her go."

"Or what?"

"Or I'm going to find out what this gun does." _Ok, I doubt she's really torturing Brianna, just holding her captive I suppose. But then again, I always seem to underestimate just how _evil _this little… troublemaker is._

"No, no no no no no. Don't… do that. I'll just go get her!" The pale villainess slipped into a nearby closet, slamming the door behind her.

Obi-wan stared for a moment, and then there was a loud rustling and, following that, the sound of a body hitting the door. A second later, Brianna stepped out.

"I trapped her, let's go!" The museum worker slammed the door behind her. "Do you mind if I see that gun for a minute?"

"Erm... maybe later. Right now we have to find the way out of here. There!" He darted over to the door Brianna had pointed out earlier, whipped it open, and steeped through. Only to find himself precariously balanced on the edge of a high ledge over a tank of piranhas. "Not good," He murmured, flailing his arms in a desperate attempt to regain balance... At that moment, a hand grabbed his wrist and yanked him back. He turned towards his rescuer, expecting Brianna, but instead found himself only inches from Cleverlight.

Ventress had changed back to herself, planning to sneak around the corner and jump him in an attempt to pry the infuser from him, but at that moment he'd gone through the exciting door at too fast of a pace. She didn't have time to become Brianna again, she just needed to pull him back. She did so, without thinking first of what would happen. And now they were face-to-face, and she'd rescued him again, and she'd been trying so desperately to prove she didn't care about him. For years she'd claimed that the only reason she'd kept him alive was so that she'd have bait for Chosen One.

_Why did she…? She could have just let me fall… Oh, that's right. She wants her precious gun back, _Obi-wan thought scathingly. _I don't matter. I just happen to be holding something she wants. _That thought was upsetting, in a way. Ventress broke their awkward silence by lunging for the infuser.

Obi-wan held tighter to it. If the little she-devil wanted her latest plaything back, she'd have to fight for it, because he wasn't letting go. She refused to let go as well, and back and forth they tugged, and then-

Somehow the gun went off, the bright silver shot ricocheting through the room, bouncing off various metal objects, clinging and clanging, barely missing Cleverlight herself, and finally managing to escape the lair through an old ventilation hatch.

"Obi-wan? Obi? Master?" Hannah gave up calling him and paused to think. She'd seen him go down this alleyway, which ended in a dead end. So where was he? She heard something clanging to her right… Master? She took a few steps closer, only to be hit right in the face by something small but speedy that flew from a vent in the side of the old warehouse.

"Now look what you did!" Ventress snapped.

"What I did? If you hadn't tried to steal this from me-"

"If you hadn't broken into _my _lair and started threatening me with _my _own stuff…"

At that moment, the braindroids swept down again, having re-located the reporter. Obi-wan took off, dropping the now empty gun and running towards the only wall in the whole place with nothing blocking it. That must be the exit, and if not, he was about to run headlong into a brick wall.

Halfway to the door, Brianna darted from a nearby aisle to join him. "There you are! We need to get rid of these droids. Got anything?" Obi-wan suddenly snatched up a piece of dynamite from a nearby shelf, still running. "Here! See if you can light it from the flame thing over there!"

Sure enough, coming up on Brianna's side of the aisle was a flame-endowed device. She couldn't blow up her precious creations! Her braindroids were like little pets... Her hand still hurt from where one had bit her the other day. Ok, for the greater good of getting Kenobi out of the lair. She lit the fuse and threw it over her shoulder. She and Kenobi had just reached the wall when the dynamite, and the braindroids, who had begun to play with it, thinking it was a new fetch toy, exploded. The force of the blast sent the two flying straight through the holographic wall and out into the alley.

"Wow." 'Brianna' looked over at Kenobi, who was gasping for air as he spoke. "I've never seen anyone actually fight Cleverlight like that."

"Oh."

"You were amazing."

"I just did what I had to, I guess." Ventress stuttered. Kenobi was close to her again.

"Well… wow." Obi-wan hadn't realized how close his face was to Brianna's, but now that he really looked, she was very pretty. Soft black hair, green eyes, deliciously pink lips…

For half a second, Ventress thought Kenobi might kiss her again, and as eager as she was to feel his lips again, the last thing she wanted to do was build a relationship with him as Brianna. The moment was soon ruined however, as a short, overly-skinny girl leaned over them. Her hand was pressed tightly to her nose.

"Obi!" Her voice sounded very nasal. "Whad ah you do-ig? Who's dis?"

"I just got blown up, but are you alright?" The redhead pushed himself off the ground, and 'Brianna' followed.

"I think a bee flew ub my dose."

"Well, let's drive back to the Temple then." He'd turned back to Ventress. "And this is Brianna. She's my… partner."

"Um, do, **I'm** your partner. You pobly hit your head an don't know wha your saying."

Obi-wan ignored the girl's babbling. "I'll call you again, if that's alright?"

Ventress suddenly felt a bit light-headed. "Yeah. Yeah."

Without any warning, Obi-wan hugged her.

A completely new feeling washed over her, one of warmth, and acceptance, and… love. Wow. No one had ever hugged her before. Ok, Minion had tried once, but his metal body was hard and cold, and he didn't try again. Kenobi was soft and warm and… _Can I just stay like this… forever?_

All too soon, Obi-wan had pulled away and was headed back towards the van, calling back to her something about the library and texting the details. Asajj was too dazed to catch most of it, just muttering, "Uh huh."

"Ok, dat was awkward for everyone, because you hugged her instead of me. Like, accidenilly." The news van drove off.

"Sir? Sir?" It took her a second to realize that Minion was talking to her through her communicator. "Did you find out who got hit?"

"Oh right. Code: Get the car."

"Sir… the point of a code is so that no one else understands. 'Get the car' is a pretty obvious code."

Asajj huffed defensively. "But it's _my _code. I like it."

**Sorry for updating this again and ignoring everything else, but this is just so fun to write! Next, Ventress and Greivous begin to discover who they've just endowed with great powers... and Asajj begins spending more time with the new hero's master than the hero herself.  
>Oh, I love teasers. X3<strong>


	12. Chapter 12: My favorite number!

**The next chapter or so will be sprt of 'choppy', jumping from scene to scene. Little ~~~~~ symbols mean a new scene, because I can't exactly do a montage like in the movie, or one of those little swirly in and out visual effects. :3 As usual, flashbacks (there is one today!) and thoughts are in _italics._**

**Ok, trivia: Forcebook is a play on Facebook. A _palindrome _is a word or phrase that's the same backwards and forwards (like, say, Hannah). The line about test scores being so high she failed is from an episode of _Phineas and Ferb- _Baljeet mentions that he was kicked out of summer school because his test scores were too high. **

**...**

**I don't own that show either! Quit asking!**

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><p>"According to her Forcebook page, this is where she lives- third story, east wall, second window over." Minion read off the details from the laptop, but Cleverlight wasn't looking at the screen- her face was pressed to the window, watching the Padawan disappear into the front door of the temple.<p>

"Who exactly is she?"

"Name: Hannah Palindrome, Padawan of Obi-wan Kenobi-"

"Wait. This is Obi-wan's Padawan?"

"Yup. I guess he got a new one after Skywalker graduated."

"It's almost like… destiny." Ventress cracked a smile. This was perfect! She could continue to capture Obi-wan, using the same excuse as before- "Come now or it'll be the last you'll see of your precious master!"

"No criminal record… no record of anything, really. It seems that she hasn't done much with her life. At all."

"Not yet, Minion. Not yet." Ventress opened the door of the invisible car and stepped out. "Soon enough, the city shall know her name."

~~~Inside~~~

Hannah was minding her own business, playing a ChosenOne video game, rescuing Obi-wan and beating up Cleverlight, when the door flew open, and there was the baddie herself, in all her caped glory. "Hannah Pah-leen-dro-meh! Prepare to meet your destiny!"

The Padawan passed out.

"Am I pronouncing it right? Because she seems fairly unresponsive."

Minion glanced down at Hannah, sprawled out on the couch. "It's Palindrome, but I think she's not answering because she fainted."

"Why?"

"Hmmm…. Maybe a bit of knock-out spray still clings to us?"

"Either way, we can just be glad she's out." Cleverlight stepped on the TV remote as she entered the room, and the screen flipped off, eliminating the picture before either villain saw it. "Do you have a disguise?"

"I'm all set!"

Ventress twisted her watch gadget to that of a short, stubby woman with poufy white hair wearing a spangled suit. It was only then that she glanced at Minion. He'd tied on an oversized bathrobe to hide the metal components of his body, and a large wig of blond curls covered the top of his dome.

The overall effect was that of a fish perched on a bathrobed pedestal while wearing an ugly wig.

"What?" Grievous had noticed her stares.

"You look splentastic. Quick! She's waking!" Hannah had indeed gotten over her initial shock and was starting to stir. "Ah, Hannah, my dear…" Ventress felt ridiculous in this disguise, but it had to be done.

"Who are you?" Hannah didn't seem to remember anything that had happened, luckily.

"I have created you and sent you here, to Croiss- Corausant, that you might learn about justice. I am your mother."

"So… kinda like an outer space mommy."

She was already 'Mommy' to the blasted brainbots, and she didn't really want to be known as 'mommy' to this clueless new hero. "Yes. Space mom would be shorter."

"And who are you?" The heroine-to-be had noticed Grievous.

"I'm your space sister."

"Is this… some kind of dream?" Hannah was looking dazed.

"This isn't a dream. The people of this city need a hero, and you are here to be the hero they need."

"Wow…" Hannah's mind was whizzing. _If I have powers… everyone will like me, the same way they liked ChosenOne! I could have anything I want- any guy I want too!_

"I want you to remain calm. It may take days for your powers to develop fully…" At that moment, Hannah Palindrome began to change. Her straggly brown hair lengthened and began to look as though it had seen a shower recently. She grew taller, and her figure grew more feminine. Her skin-and-bones look disappeared, replaced by taught, lean muscles that Asajj would admit she envied. Her own frame was too slight to be considered imposing, and her height made the idea of 'imposing' laughable.

Slowly, Hannah lifted her feet, and found that she was floating. "This… is… epic! Woooo! Without any further comment, she swooped out the open window and zipped around the parking lot, slamming cars headlong into eachother with her new found strength. "I'm gonna be a hero! A hero!"

Minion looked apprehensively down at the girl, but Cleverlight was grinning. "See that enthusiasm, Minion? She'll do great!"

~~~Later that day~~~

"It's a fairly simple exercise. All you have to do is get past Cleverlight-"

Hannah interrupted with a snort. "That's easy, she does absolutely nothing! She's so stupid and useless. I mean-"

"Ahem." Ventress asserted. It was lovely that the girl fostered a nice dislike for her future nemesis, but now was time for listening and following, not ranting. "Get past her and rescue Obi-wan."

Minion smiled from where he was strapped to a table, tipped so his feet rested on the floor. "I'm Obi-wan!" A mannequin stolen from a local store and outfitted in black and blue leather stood before him.

"Go!" Hannah dove forward at once, but rather than rescuing 'Obi-wan', she went straight for 'Cleverlight', beating her with super-powered punches that sent the mannequin's head flying across the room. It hit the table with Minion on it, which tilted backwards. Minion let out a yelp as his feet moved skyward. Ventress was torn between disappointment and… fear. There was something fairly creepy about the satisfaction in the hero's eyes as the fake Cleverlight was pounded to pieces.

"Stop. Stop. And stop. The goal isn't to kill Cleverlight. The goal is to rescue Obi-wan, remember?"

"I knew that! I'm just getting the freak out of the way first."

~~~Later~~~

"Go!" The new hero took off like a shot, gripping Space Mom by the wrist. "Remember, Obi-wan won't want to be swung around. Stay steady and fly- Ah! Building!" she screamed, realizing that the girl had almost flown straight into the side of a skyscraper. Hannah swerved, but managed to drop Cleverlight in the process. There was a moment of terror- her life flashed before her eyes- she was going to die…

"Gotcha!" Hannah had caught her again, and then the two of them flew straight into a billboard.

"This kid is hopeless!" Ventress declared, holding an icepack to her aching head. That wasn't even quite true, as the 'kid', it turned out, was in her mid-twenties.

"I'm sure we just need to work a little more on staying on course. Course! That's it!" Minion exclaimed. "If we build a video-game type course…" Asajj stopped listening, because at that moment, Brianna's phone vibrated. She turned away from Minion for a minute and flipped it open. Four words were printed on the screen- 'Lunch at library? ~Obi'

Ventress was about to type a reply, but paused. Was it really a good idea to keep fooling Kenobi like this? He wasn't stupid; he'd figure it out eventually. Well… she could consider it part of her 'job', to keep an eye on how her adversary was doing. Keeping friends close and enemies closer. The villain responded with 'Love to, cant wait :)'

"Can't wait for what?" said Minion suddenly, and she realized that she'd said her message out loud as she typed. Oops.

"Oh, I just… I can't wait to see if Hannah responds to the new training."

"Neither can I, sir."

~~~At the library~~~

"Thank you so much for helping me with this. I mean, I don't think anyone else has even bothered to look into what Cleverlight is up to. Maybe I'm crazy." Obi-wan smiled slightly at the dark-haired woman across from him. Her shirt was lavender today.

"Oh, no, you're not crazy. You're the sensible one, trying to gain knowledge like this. Knowledge is power."

"Exactly. That's what's made Cleverlight such a problem in the past- she knows so much, it's hard to outsmart her. Strike that- it's impossible." _Outwit her, perhaps. But outsmart her? Never._

"Then maybe we should start small. Figure out her plan before we try to stop it?"

"Yes. I have these photos of the cards we found in her lair. They're actually pretty good resolution, so I've zoomed in enough to get most of the writing on most of the cards from all angles."

_Oh force, he really does have good resolution! I hope he's not as good at puzzles as he seems… _So far, Obi-wan had no idea she was Brianna. She'd managed to get the projector to change the shirt color so it looked like a new outfit. The hair had proved impossible to fix, and remained down in loose curls. She'd tried getting it back to the updo Brianna had worn a few nights ago, at the museum, but had failed miserably.

"Well, I do love a good puzzle." Which was true.

"As do I. And Cleverlight is quite the puzzle." _Did I say that out loud? I didn't mean to…_

"Oh? And how is she puzzling?" This was the perfect opportunity to delve into Kenobi's thoughts, specifically those involving her.

"It's just-" _Do not mention the kiss, Obi-wan. Don't even brush on it. _"She seems to show occasional signs of loneliness, depression, even low self-esteem."

_"I'm a failure as a person." A low mutter he barely heard._

_"What?" Her head shot up- obviously she hadn't meant him to hear her._

_"Hose-tages should only speak when spoken to." Her back was still towards him._

_"You're not a failure. I think you're a pretty good villainess, actually."_

_Ventress finally whirled to face him. "Because it takes _such_ a successful person to allow ChosenOne to fly them off to prison twice a week." Her voice was scathing._

_"Look at all these contraptions and machines. Amazing. You have technology no one has even dreamed of."_

_"Useless. All of it useless against your Padawan." She moved in closer, because she had to up the drama factor, even in a conversation like this one. "And look at you! Tied up here almost every day, and not a scratch on you. ChosenOne gets you out of everything."_

_"Why do you bring me here?" He'd asked abruptly._

_One eyebrow arched suspiciously. "As bait. You know that."_

_"Anakin would come without any. I think you're lonely."_

_"Ridiculous!" She drew back now. "You are bait and nothing more."_

_Obi-wan seized the idea. "You're lonely. You have no one to talk to. And so I'm here."_

_"No. You serve your purpose and that is all."_

_"You're lonely, aren't you? And I'm the person who's willing to speak with you."_

_"Shut up." She turned away again, and Obi-wan knew he'd dug too deep._

"No she doesn't!" Ventress snapped. Obi-wan looked at her weird. "I mean, her ego's the size of the Temple. She definitely doesn't have low self-esteem." _What the hoth does he mean, 'I have low self esteem'? _

"Which is what makes it so puzzling. It's just a feeling I get. Anyway, back to the papers. They're categorized in too many ways. Position, color, shape, size… Some are squares, some rectangles, a few triangles, and all different sizes. Mostly they're yellow, white, and red, but there are a few blue as well. Not to mention that some of them have shapes, like these few," he paused to point out places in the picture, "Have stars, and this one has a heart." He pointed out a blue piece at the edge of the cloud.

_Crap! I did NOT mean to draw that! _"Ok, so what's the first step?"

"Reproduce all the writing that's on the cards. Then we can start making and hanging them."

The rest of the meeting passed without incident. Ventress considered purposely messing up Obi-wan's work, but somehow, that didn't seem quite fair. The villain/hero rules still applied, even though the old hero was gone and the new one not trained yet, and disguised sabotage was certainly unfair. Then again, Obi-wan had kissed her. That was unfair.

"I really can't understand all this scientific stuff here, but this is a drawing of a DNA strand… Or she's using a double helix as one of her shape classifications."

Brianna laughed quietly. "Well, this is Cleverlight we're talking about."

"You're right. As I said before, she's a real puzzle. Not to mention that I constantly have to sort out fact from fiction- so many people buy into tabloid type stories about her." Ugh, the garbage stories he was sometimes asked about. Is Cleverlight a human in disquise? Do her gadgets really work? Is her skin slimy? How much lipstick does she wear? Is Cleverlight really a female? Is it true that she failed school because her scores were too high? Honestly. Of course she's a female, no she's not human, and yes, her 'gadgets' work just fine!

'Brianna' knew the stories. "I've seen them all. But I don't think anyone will ever understand her, really." _Not even you, Kenobi, even though you try. I'm keeping an eye on you. A very close one. If I'm a puzzle, then I don't want to be solved._

**Up next, Minion grows suspicious of Ventress's disappearances... Mwahaha!**


	13. Chapter 13: No! Thirteen is bad luck!

**I am having waaaaay too much fun writing this.**

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><p>"Fly through the course, destroy the obstacles, and rescue Space sister. Ready… GO!"<p>

Hannah performed spectacularly. She flew like she was born to fly, her fists plowed through brick walls, lasers easily bounced off of her… _I should really shoot _myself _with another of those bullets. ChosenOne would be so surprised when… Oh. He's gone. It wouldn't work out anyway. I have to lose, or else the cycle doesn't continue. _

"What do you think, Sir? Do you think she's ready for the next part of her training?" The phone vibrated against her hip.

"Oh absolutely. You set it up 'Space sister'. I have… a few places to go."

"Go? Sir, where could you possibly have to go?"

Cleverlight bit her lip. "Oh, just… places. The park, actually."

"This isn't about Obi-wan Kenobi, is it?" The fish's eyebrows lowered.

"Absolutely not. Sort of. Ok, yes. I'm just trying to lead him off our trail, you know, keep an eye on what he's found out."

Minion frowned at her for a moment, then bought it. "Alright. Just don't let him on to you. If he finds out who you really are…"

"What's the worst that could happen?"

Grievous was silent, debating whether or not he should tell her the truth- _He could break your heart. _"I don't know. Just… go meet with the kidnappee. I'll handle the hero."

~~~At the park~~~

"Not a very professional way to meet, is it? But it was such a nice day, I couldn't resist. You don't mind, do you?" Obi-wan had red, white, and yellow paper spread out on a folding table- a few blue among the edges.

"Of course not."

"I may live in the city, but really, I'm an outdoor person." He glanced towards the woman next to him. "You?"

Ventress had sort of dropped the idea of answering as Brianna, and she was trying to find her own answer to the question. "I don't really know. I grew up in the city. Never left it." _Between prison and evil lair, I've never had the chance to see much of the outdoors._

"Oh, but there's lots of 'outdoors' here in JedihTem- _Jedi Temple." _He was starting to talk like Cleverlight-Force! "The lakeside beach is usually quite nice, and so are most of the parks. Of course, right now, they're full of garbage, as the Jedi refuse to leave the Temple…"

"Hmm…" _So, the cleanliness level of the park and beach upsets Obi-wan? I should fix it. _

His voice suddenly dropped. "I don't know whether to blame Cleverlight or not. I mean, she killed Anakin, and they're understandably scared. But she hasn't done anything threatening since! You'd think they'd have a little more courage."

"I've never been to a park before." She blurted suddenly.

Obi-wan gave her the faintest look of surprise, but he hid it well. "How are you liking it now, right now?"

Her green eyes lit up. "I like it. The grass is so… so… deliciously soft, but spiky. And the trees! The air!" Ventress had decided, then and there, that she was an outdoor person too.

Obi-wan smiled to himself at her reaction. He'd known Brianna, in the past, to be uptight and condescending, but he must have judged her too soon. She was fun.

~~~Late that night~~~

"Ok, maybe I'm just not following. First you want to make a new hero. Now you want to clean the park?" Minion's look of confusion bored into her green eyes, but she wasn't paying attention. "What's gotten into you lately?"

"Minion. Minion, Minion, Minion. Don't you see? We can't have our first fight with our new hero when the place is a mess! We need to lure people out of their homes to watch us fight! And the best way to do that is to dehydrate all the garbage piles, then throw away the cubes. Simple, right?"

"I suppose…"

~~~The next day~~~

"Now, we're going to work on banter! So, I be Cleverlight, I say something, and you give me a witty response. Ok?"

"Yeah, uh-huh." Hannah stared lazily into the distance. With her powers of sight, it was likely that she was watching something far away- she could be watching TV for all Minion knew.

"Uh, Hannah? Are you paying attention?" Space-sister put in. Lately, Hannah spaced out as much as Ventress did, and he had the nasty suspicion that it was for the same reason- romance. _Oh Cleverlight. Don't get too involved. It'll never work. _It would be quite impossible telling this to the supervillain, however, and he still had no solid proof that something was going on.

"Ok, ok."

Ventress cleared her throat. "You've fallen right into my trap!"

"Whatever."

"No, no, no. You have to think of something to say back, like…"

_I can't be trapped. I'm a physical representation of the belief of justice. _

Cleverlight swallowed. How was it possible that she actually _missed _ChosenOne? Because no matter how obnoxious as he was, he was a player in the game of her life. Obi-wan was as well, and Minion, Windu the Warden, to some extent. They were the people in her world, and she… cared for them. And now one was gone.

"Uh, Corausant to Space-Mom?" Hannah interrupted her thoughts.

"Like, 'But even the strongest of traps cannot restrain integrity!' Like that."

"Uh, yeah. Sure." The girl was now applying red lipstick, eyes focused on the compact mirror in front of her. Ventress sighed. How could she? Sure, presentation was important, and looks, but being able to respond well was _more _important! Was this girl really about to become a participant in the game of good and evil?

~~~That evening~~~

"It's gone? All of it?" Obi-wan's face was filled with delight as he looked across the sands and into the water. The air was chilly, so the beach was empty of people- but what was more, it was miraculously empty of garbage as well!

"Uh-huh. Noticed it just today and thought I'd show you." Brianna responded. It was a lie, of course- she'd had the braindroids cleaning here all last night to surprise him. She'd remembered his disappointment at seeing the trash in the park, so she'd cleaned both places.

"But how? I mean, you didn't do this, did you? You couldn't have!" It was true, no one person could have cleaned the whole beach.

"No. I only saw that it was clean, so I called you."

"But the Jedi are still in hiding." Obi-wan brought a hand up to stroke his beard in thought, though his eyes were still filled with happiness. "Surely not-?"

"Cleverlight?"

"She must have. Her little droids could have cleaned this place. But why would she order them to pick up litter? It certainly doesn't fit with her evil image."

"Yes, but what evil overlord wants to rule a city with garbage instead of people? She must have gotten tired of looking at the mess. After all, she seems to be quite organized. Maybe the clutter was bothering her."

"Maybe so." Obi-wan agreed. "Either way, I say we just enjoy it. Have you seen the sun set over the lake before?" Asajj almost wished she hadn't brought him here at sunset- it upped the 'romance' factor. But she was enjoying it a lot herself…

"No. I've never even come to the beach before." She admitted, which was almost true- she'd only been here last night, to supervise cleanup.

Obi-wan frowned slightly. If she'd never been here before, how had she known the garbage was gone? There was something Brianna wasn't telling him. He wasn't sure he quite understood why Cleverlight had cleaned the beach either. Did Brianna have some connection with Ventress? It made sense, in a way- Brianna told Ventress he was upset about the garbage, Ventress cleaned it and told Brianna to tell him.

He discarded the idea almost immediately. First off, why should Cleverlight _care _he was upset? And why would Brianna be helping him figure out Cleverlight's plans? Cleverlight might be spying on them. That would explain it. And Brianna just happened to go past the beach on her way somewhere else. Just a coincidence.

For now, he only wanted to enjoy his time with Brianna.

~~~Later that night~~~

Cleverlight flopped backwards against the black leather chair and put her feet up on her desk with a contented sigh. Sir was so much happier lately… and she'd been gone again this evening…_Kenobi._ Grievous had to get to the bottom of this. It was for her own good.

"You seem happy."

"Ah yes. Surely just because our plan is going so well. We'll have someone to fight again!"

"So… where were you earlier?"

"Just at the beach."

"Doing what?"

"Watching the sun go down. I've never done that before."

"Alone?"

Ventress sat up, scowling. "What is this, an in-terr-oh-ga-tion?"

"You were with Kenobi again, weren't you?"

"Minion!" She spluttered.

"I'm just trying to watch out for you!" The fish returned, moving forward in his dome.

"And what oh-so-terrible thing is going to happen?"

Grievous was silent for a moment, trying to figure how best to explain his thoughts. "Your relationship with Kenobi has to be professional- kidnapper and victim."

"It _is _pro-fess-eeon-al. I'm in disquise, remember?"

_But that doesn't stop _you _from being effected… _"I know, but even as Brianna, you'll… I mean, he'll…"

"I know what I'm doing! I'm just trying to figure out what he knows about our plan!"

"And what happens when he finds out who Brianna is? What then?"

"He'll be disappointed at the loss of his as-is-tahnt." Ventress's voice had a finality that ended the conversation. She settled back into the chair.

Minion sighed as he turned away. _I really hope I'm wrong about this… for her sake._

~~~A few days later~~~

"Hey. Corausant to Brianna?" The woman jumped slightly, trance broken. "You've been staring at the same page for the past five minutes." He smiled slightly, showing it to be a joke rather than a reprimand.

"Sorry. I didn't sleep well last night." Minion's warnings had been manifesting themselves in her dreams over the past couple of days- she had constant nightmares in which Obi-wan murdered her. Stupid really, but they kept her up all the same.

"Mm, me neither." He confessed, lowering the book in front of him. "I was up too late thinking."

"What about?"

He chuckled. "What am I always thinking about these days?"

"Those cards." Brianna said with a smile. "We've almost finished them. That's good."

"Do you want to help hang them?"

"Hmm?"

"I mean, you've done plenty already to help, if you want to leave the hanging to me that's perfectly fine-"

"Oh, no I'd love to. When?"

"Now!" Obi-wan decided spontanieously. He had the afternoon off work, as it was a dead news day, and a secondary reporter was handling everything.

"Now?" She had a training session with Minion and Hannah this afternoon. Well, Minion _could _do it himself… "I'm open. My museum blew up, remember?"

"Right. Are you… out of work?"

"For now. Living on savings, you know. And… a few book royalties." Oops, didn't mean to say that…

"You write?"

"Nothing currently, but I have a few out there." This was the truth -Cleverlight had written a few novels, publishing them under a fake name, of course.

"I'd love to read them sometime, if you don't mind. So, ready to start delving into the mind of Cleverlight?"

She laughed. "As I'll ever be."

~~~Jedi Temple~~~

"Hey Obi!" A woman with short blond hair called from across the lobby lounge. "Who's your girlfriend?"

"Siri…" he hissed. "Do you have to… embarrass me in front of everyone _always?" _The woman-Siri- laughed.

"Dude. You're so uptight. So who is she?"

"I'm, uh, Brianna." Cleverlight stepped forward. "I work at ChosenOne Museum."

"Nice." Siri said. "Until it blew up, anyway."

"We're woring on a project." Obi-wan said, sort of importantly.

"About Cleverlight?"

Kenobi looked deflated. "Yes."

"Well, I'll let you go then. I got a date tonight."

"Have fun then." Obi-wan called as he opened the elevator doors.

"So, that was…?"

"Siri. Jedi. Good friend of mine. A little weird, but fun." Obi-wan choked slightly just as the elevator doors closed. "I dated her back in high school."

"Oh." You could literally feel the awkward. _Well, what did you expect? He'd date no one in shool just because he was friendly towards you? That was Cleverlight me. Ventress me. I'm Brianna now._

_Girlfriend. She asked who my _girlfriend _was. Oh, Siri, I swear I'm going to murder you… _His eyes darted to Brianna.

As soon as the doors opened, it was as if all the awkward had escaped and dissipated into the air. Brianna suddenly asked, "How did she know our project was about Cleverlight, anyway?"

"Oh, I'm _always _trying to figure her out, really. To be honest, I was trying to predict the date of my next kidnapping. There was no pattern, in case you're wondering."

Ventress's curiousity got the better of her, and she pounced on this opportunity. "You know her best, right? So, is she really predictable? Dull?"

Obi-wan thought. "I wouldn't say… dull. Her plans are quite predictable, but she herself isn't. Mostly I just tell her she is to annoy her."

"I knew it! I mean, knew someone like her couldn't really be dull." _Oh, I got you now Kenobi. You don't really think I'm predictable at all!_

This conversation, Obi-wan noted as he opened his apartment door, was quickly venturing towards taboo topics. Like his stupid dreams… For the past week, he'd been having dreams in which he, tied in his 'kidnapping chair', had accused Cleverlight of being predictable, and, as a response, she kissed him._ Really_ kissed him, too. Sometimes she ended with 'How's that for predictable?', sometimes it hadn't even ended, he'd simply awoken.

"Obi-wan? You're, uh, star-ing into space."

"Star-ing… that's it!" Obi-wan shouted suddenly. "The stars on the cards… they represent the cards that hang further forward! The more stars, the further forward it hangs! Brianna, you're a genius!" His hands caught her shoulders briefly before he swept away and grabbed up cards and tape.

"Am I?" Brianna asked, frowning slightly. She hadn't meant to clue him in to the organizing system at all- if he blasted figured it out, it was all her fault. "I thought Cleverlight was the genius."

"Yes, but you're far more willing to help me, obviously." Obi-wan had begun to tape the strings to the ceiling. "Cleverlight would prefer I fall off the face of the earth." He muttered. She barely heard it. Why would he…? Oh wait, that's right… she'd yelled at him to get out of her office. She should make it up to him. In fact, she would. As soon as she went back to the lair to leave off her watch, she'd come back and make it right.

~~~That evening~~~

"Where _were _you? I had to train _your _hero all by _my_self!"

"Uhhhhh…. my meeting ran late."

"You don't go to meetings."

"Well, I'm the overlord of the whole city now. Sometimes you have to do things you don't want to do…"

"You were with Kenobi. I thought maybe our talk the other day had some effect on you sir."

"I was _not _with Kenobi, I was… I was…" She fumbled, searching for an excuse.

"I smell his shampoo."

"So maybe I was!" Ventress snapped. "It's my business."

Minion looked more hurt than angry now. "We used to tell eachother everything."

"I would tell you, but… you get all mad at meee…" He was giving her the sad-puppy face, and she couldn't stay mad at him.

"Sir, I'm just looking out for you. And it seems that this little side project of watching Kenobi is getting more important to you than our _actual_ mission- training the city's new hero."

"I'll re-focus. Thanks Minion."

"No problem little buddy." As the fish left, Asajj felt a spasm of guilt. She _had _to make things right. Then she'd never meet with him without telling Minion ever again. Just this one time, as herself. Then, once the new hero was revealed, Brianna could stop meeting Obi-wan, and he'd be her kidnapping victim, and everything would be normal again.

**Cleverlight always has money- like enough to build her contraptions and order parts- so it makes sense that she has a sourse of income: she writes. I imagine she's come up with some _really _good mysteries!**

**I wanted to include Siri in this story, so Obi-wan has at least one friend that we meet, and it seems to me that they'd remain good friends, even after they broke up back in high school/college.**

**In the next chapter, Cleverlight has a meeting with Obi-wan _as herself, _not Brianna, so don't get confused! As far as Obi-wan knows, they are seperate people. :3**


	14. Chapter 14: The following chapter

**Again, having too much fun writing this. It's in the rules of fanfic writing: Do many people like and read your story? You will have zero motivation! Is it a very stupid story read by slim to none? You will write like crazy!**

**Ok, in this, other planets are like countries, so a Christosian place, to them, is kinda like an Italian place, or Mexican or something. Falcon Street is named for the _Falcon_ of course! **

**NOTE: Hannah, though she shares Darth Maul's name, isn't darth Maul. Not planning on making her ANYTHING like her namesake. Just thought I'd clear that up.**

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><p>"Kenobi?" His apartment was dark, but from the balcony door, she could see the outlines of cards hanging in the middle of his living room, cards she'd helped hang that day.<p>

"Kenobi? Are you… home?" Cleverlight let herself in and slipped down the hall. His bedroom door was open. "Are you asleep?" Part of her hoped he was, so that she could leave without this whole 'apology' thing. She hated being wrong. But to get Obi-wan back to their level of toleration/almost friends/banter, she had to do it.

The covers moved. He was asleep already. She must have forgotten how late it was after waiting for Minion to go to sleep. Ventress turned to go back out to the balcony and to her waiting hover-cycle when she heard his mumble of "Cleverlight?"

"Kenobi?" She whispered.

He sat up in bed, the white of his shirt the most visible thing in the room. "What are you doing here?"

Defensive mechanisms up. "Hey, you come into my office without asking."

"You weren't _sleeping." _He had a point.

"I'm sorry, I didn't know you'd be asleep. I just…

"What is it you want, Cleverlight?"

Defensive mechanisms down. She shuffled her slippered feet. "I wanted to… to say sorry."

"You wanted to _apologize?" _Well this was new. Ventress never apologized, she blamed others or denied her own fault in the incident.

"Yeah. Because I didn't _mean _to be rude to you. And I was hoping we could go back to being sort-of-almost-friends. I don't like you mad at me." She stepped into the room, right to the edge of the bed as she spoke, and Obi-wan could see her clearly. And right now, she looked neither evil nor intimidating- just _adorable. _She was clearly dressed for bed, in black flannel pajamas with little blue lightning bolts. A flannel cape of solid blue hung down to her knees, and there was no high collar. Not even gloves. He hated the gut reaction of _cute _that came to mind... but it came to mind anyway.

"So, you do regret killing Anakin?" He whispered.

Defensive mechanisms _very _down. "I never meant to kill him. I…I…expected him to live." Asajj stammered. "And I'm sorry, for kidnapping you, and for kicking you out of city hall."

Obi-wan smiled slightly in the darkness. "You don't regret… what happened between us?" Ventress had leaned down, to hear him better, but now she suddenly felt… embarrassed. And when she was embarrassed, she got flustered, and when she was flustered, she talked a mile-a-minute.

"No. I don't really regret that, I mean, that is, you're the one who's always cared about me and believed I wasn't evil and you have gorgeous eyes and why are you… looking at me like that?"

"You're cute." Obi-wan said abruptly, looking surprised at himself.

"Cute? _Cute?" _she huffed. "I am many things, but I am _not _cute." If anything, he seemed amused at her statement. _Cute? Why on croissant would he call me that? I'm not cute… _She was still turning the question over in her mind when he leaned up and kissed her.

He jerked back almost immediately, as if he had touched something hot. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have." Cleverlight's expression was one of shock… Force, he'd messed up _again. _"Maybe you should just leave while we both have some shred of dignity."

"But I'm not finished yet…" Cleverlight said simply, and with that, she kissed him once more. She held it for longer now, sitting down on his bed so their heads were level and pulling her legs up next to her. Obi-wan took the step that clearly presented itself, putting his arms around her gently and pulling her almost to his lap. The flannel of her pajamas was warm and soft against his fingertips. Her mouth tasted minty fresh, like toothpaste, which almost amused him- an evil overlord, brushing her teeth.

But no time to think of that now.

Ventress's hands had stopped being clueless and had come to rest on his chest. Her lips were very soft, reminding him of just how… inexperienced she was. She surely hadn't kissed anyone before this; being a villainess certainly wasn't a career that led to romantic opportunities. Villainess… He was kissing a villainess, _the _villainess. The one who had killed his apprentice. She'd apologized. But still…

She wasn't sure quite how long she'd wanted this. Since their bantering began? Since she'd started kidnapping him? Since their one day in shool? Her fingers stretched up to touch the edges of his hair- soft and silky, as expected. This was glorious! Who knew visiting mid-night would lead to such wonderful oc-or-ances?

Ventress pulled away first, her lungs thirsting for breath. It took her a few good gasps before she was really caught up on airflow, and even then, all she could say was, "Whoa."

"Yeah. Whoa." Obi-wan responded. There was silence. "We can't do this."

"Why not?" Ventress spluttered.

"You're evil." _I don't even know if you like me, or you're just trying to get to me… You ruined everyone's lives… _

Ventress couldn't deny it. Not even for him. She was evil, she knew she was. A blackened soul who didn't even deserve Obi-wan's affection. The alien pulled away from him, standing up. "I guess I am. And evil does _not _visit Jedi in the middle of the night. Or apologize." She paused, arms crossed, waiting to see what effect this had on him. A piece of her wanted him to call her back, tell her it was ok, that he didn't mind that she was evil- or that she_ wasn't _evil.

She had taken back the apology, in a way. He couldn't believe it. Every time he got convinced she wasn't really evil, that she was redeemable, she did something to prove him otherwise. Like killing his Padawan. Or this. "Get out of my room." He ordered, disgusted, but unsure if it was at her or at himself. Disgusted with himself for _liking _her, and _enjoying _those kisses.

Ventress left, cape swishing dramatically. He waited until he heard the balcony door slam before he lay back down. It was only then that he remembered Brianna. Brianna, the woman who'd helped him with his crazy ideas, had walked with him on the beach, and had unexplainably made him happy again. Waves of guilt washed over him. He'd betrayed her, sitting here and kissing Cleverlight.

Tomorrow, he decided, he'd ask her out, on a real date. And he was never going to kiss Cleverlight again, as long as he lived.

~~~Cit Hall aka Evil Lair part 2~~~

_Minion was right. _Asajj rested her forehead against the door of the refridgerator. The metal was cool, in great contrast to the utter heat she'd experienced just minutes ago. _It's a bad idea to get too close to him. Will I even be able to give my evil monologue to him anymore? I'm supposed to be professional here! _

"Sir?" Grievous poked his fishbowl around the corner.

"I'm just thirsty, Minion. You can go back to sleep mode." She opened the refridgerator door casually, reaching in as though looking for something. Minion smiled, then curled back up in the bottom of the bowl. The lights on his suit blinked off, and the creation hummed down to sleep.

Ventress closed the fridge door. Kenobi's rejection hurt, but at least she still had Brianna. Maybe she'd never have to reveal her identity. She'd just restrain her relationship to friends, and… always want more. Her harmless little attraction, which had developed into a almost-harmless little crush, had spiraled into a not-so-harmless… something. It was too late at night for emotions. She was going to bed.

~~~The next day~~~

"Do you think she's ready?" Minion glanced at 'Space-mom'.

"As she'll ever be." Ventress muttered. "I say we give her a final test tomorrow, then arrange the battle for Saturday."

"Test Friday, battle Saturday. Got it." Minion agreed.

"What battle?" Hannah asked, butting in on the conversation.

"Your battle to free the city from the grips of Cleverlight." Ventress announced.

"Sweet! Do I get, like, some sort of cool super hero name? Or like, a costume?"

"Absolutely." Asajj assured her. "Space-sister has been working on it for quite some time. You get to wear it, starting Saturday."

"How about Friday? Can I wear it Friday?"

"After you pass the test, it's yours." Minion assured her.

"Great! I have my name all picked out already. _Darth Maul. _Isn't that awesome?"

"Um… sure. Great." _Maul sounds a bit vicious, actually. I hope she doesn't try to maul anyone… like me!_

"I'm gonna start studying for that test!" Hannah declared, soaring up into the sky and perching on the ledge of a building. She stared off into the distance, and Ventress wondered, yet again, if she was watching TV. Or watching _someone…_ After a while, the girl began simply looping around the building, testing her flight skills.

"Minion, I'm going to meet with Kenobi _one _more time before our battle. Is that alright with you?" She set her holo-watch to Brianna as the villains strolled into City Hall _Evil Lair part2. _

"Absolutely. I'm just glad you're telling me. And that you have your priorities straight. Training comes first. We'll make the final touches to your machine tonight and tomorrow evening."

"Great. I'll see you later." And with that, she set off towards the same place she'd been last night- Obi-wan's apartment in the Temple.

She didn't come in through the balcony this time, but used the lobby and elevator like a normal person. (Siri greeted her cheerfully with, "Hi, Obi-wan's girlfriend!") Obi-wan answered right away when she rang his doorbell, and he looked happy again, as though last night had never happened. _It didn't happen. Not for Brianna it didn't._

"Brianna! I wasn't expecting you."

"I just decided to drop by and tell you that the art museum is open again." _Because I returned the art the night before our little episode of kissing. _

"It is? That's fantastic! To be honest, I was worried that the art wouldn't come back." Ventress swallowed slightly. Minion hadn't noticed that all the art was gone from City Hall aka Evil Lair part 2 yet. She left his favorite statue, as well as all the manequins he's stolen.

"I haven't seen it, mind you. Just heard it from someone else."

"Have you ever been to the art museum?"

"No… ok, yes. But I was really little, and I don't remember any of it." this was a lie too. She'd seen the art when she'd rehung it, but she'd never really _looked _at it. A few of the paintings had hung in City Hall aka Evil Lair part 2 for a while, but most had just been tucked away in a closet.

"Let's go there."

"Now?" Obi-wan certainly was spontaneous lately.

"Sure, why not? Unless you're busy."

"No, not at all." As long as she came back by evening… Minion wouldn't mind, right?

"Great. I'll just grab shoes, and we can walk."

~~~Art Museum~~~

"I love this place!" Brianna declared. "The lighting is perfect, the paintings, statues!" She looked almost like a kid in a candy store, running from art piece to art piece.

"I don't get it. Why would Cleverlight return all these?"

Brianna shrugged. "She got tired of looking at them? Or… maybe Cleverlight really isn't so bad."

Obi-wan was thoughtful, she could see it in his face. Finally, he shrugged as well. "Let's just enjoy the art while it's here."

They wandered through the museum, commenting on various works, although Obi-wan noticed that there was a certain statue that was still missing- according to the placard, _Girl with water jug. _Finally they ended up standing in front of an abstract that looked a lot like Cleverlight's 'thought cloud'.

"I'd feel stupid if the cards weren't her plan, just a recreation of this painting."

Brianna laughed. "Somehow, I doubt it. What else does this remind you of?"

"Space." Obi-wan replied. "The blue places have little splatters, like stars, and the yellowy orange and red in the center is like nebula."

"I see what you mean," She responded, head tilting, "but look at it from this angle. It's more like an explosion, isn't it? With debris flying into the sky?"

"It is, indeed." Obi-wan decided. "And yet if you look at it upside down, it looks like a sunset, over the water. Blue sky, blue water. Red and yellow for the sun going down."

"Oo, I like that interpretation." Brianna stretched out her hands, picked the picture off the wall, and turned it over, holding it up upside down. "How do we know the artist didn't mean for it to be hung this way, anyway? Who's to say that the other way is up?"

Obi-wan smiled slightly, glad that there weren't any employees around yet- the museum was freshly open. "You're right." Suddenly he snapped his fingers. "That's it! Who's to say that Cleverlight meant for the cloud to be viewed from the direction of the curtain? Maybe we've been looking at it from the completely wrong angle!"

"Hey, you're right." Brianna agreed, rehanging the painting the correct way.

"I'll look at it as soon as I get home." Obi-wan vowed. "but for now, how about we just look at the art. Forget about Cleverlight, and her plans. We deserve an evening off."

_Evening? _Asajj glanced casually down at her watch. Sure enough, they'd been in the museum for a good two hours, as it was now seven-thirty. _Seven-thirty? Minion's going to kill me! I told him I'd be back by _six-_thirty!_ Suddenly, she forgot Minion as Obi-wan's hand brushed against hers.

Her hand responded, brushing back. A quick glance at Obi-wan's face revealed a look of relief, and then he took her hand and held it. They were quiet for a few moments, holding hands and looking at the painting of space, or an explosion, or an upside-down sunset.

"Brianna? Do you want to go out to dinner Saturday? I mean, as a date." Saturday was the day of the battle. If all went as planned, she'd be in jail Saturday evening.

"I'm busy Saturday." She blurted. "I'm…. going to dinner!" _Why had she said _that?

"Oh." His hand loosened slightly.

"Wiiiith my brother and his wife." She finished, and was relieved to feel his hand tightening again.

"Friday then?"

Ventress contemplated this for a moment. This would be an easy way to escape being Brianna- tell Obi-wan she was only interested in him as a friend, then contact would lessen, and then she'd be free to just be Ventress again. But… temptation was great. She broke.

"I'd love to." The smile was worth it. _His _smile was amazing.

"Great. Do you like that Christosian place on Falcon Street?"

"I've never been."

"It's great- I love Christosian food, and the atmosphere is nice."

_Isn't the atmosphere the same everywhere? Maybe they have special air, with different molecules or something. _"Falcon Street isn't far from my a-part-ment. I'll meet you there."

"Sure. I'll make reservations for seven?"

"Great. Seven. Yes." Her eyes had seen something out in the street- Minion! "Oh, look at the time. I really have to go now. I have an important meeting for… work." She rushed off without another word.

"Well, goodbye?"

~~~In the invisible car~~~

"And what on Corausant were you doing _in the art museum? _You decided to steal more art while _I_ was finishing the control suit? It's not fair that I'm putting in one-hundred percent and we're lucky if you're giving twenty!"

"I guess you're right, Minion."

"Well, at least that's the last meeting with Kenobi. Everything will go back to normal day after tomorrow."

Ventress swallowed guiltily. She'd have to sneak out again for her dinner date- not to mention that her meetings were supposed to be just that- meetings. Not dates.

~~~Friday~~~

"Did I pass? Did I?"

"Absolutely." Asajj declared. She sank down onto a park bench and picking up the box sitting next to her. She mentioned for the new hero to sit next to her, then opened the box. "These are your hero robes. Wear them for your first battle, so the people recognize you as a hero."

"Will you give me new ones, so I can always wear them?"

"Space-sister and I won't always be here. We have people in other countries, and other towns to train."

"You're leaving me?" Hannah looked a bit upset, but then she saw her new robes. Bright gold, and with red and white accents, the Jedi robes definitely stood out in a sea of white, black, gray, and brown. "This is epic! Thanks so much Space Sister!"

Minion smiled modestly. "It was no trouble. I'm going to go get lemonade!" She disappeared back into the 'spacecraft' Cleverlight had built just for this purpose.

Asajj sighed dreamily. She was about to go on her first real date- and with _Obi-wan. _"Do you have romance in your life, Hannah?"

"Well, not right now. But there's this one guy that I've been watching, and… I think he likes me too."

"That's wonderful." Cleverlight said absentmindedly, eyes on the clouds.

"Lemonade!" Greious declared, hlding out glasses to them- Hannah didn't even notice that he had four arms.

"Here's to Darth!" Cleverlight raised her glass in a toast. "Tomorrow, you take on Cleverlight, and the city shall be yours!"

~~~That evening~~~

"The museums and stores re-opened, the park and beach cleaned, the streets perfectly safe? Has something happened to Cleverlight? Has our town villain changed her mind about how to rule this place? This is Obi-wan Kenobi, reporting live from West Park, surprised and pleasantly confused." The look on his face during this report made it all worth it, Asajj thought. He was cheerful again. She'd made him happy. And that made _her _happy.

"You're in quite a good mood tonight." Minion commented. _She hasn't been with Kenobi today, I know she hasn't… She must be focused on her job for once!_

"Yes… It must be the ex-cite-ment of the battle tomorrow."

Minion had his tape measure out, getting measurements on every part of Cleverlight possible- Hannah wasn't the only one getting a new costume! "A little narrower in the shoulders. I'll have to take out an inch or so. And the new boots arrived?"

"Just showed up yesterday! This is going to be the most amaing cape you've ever created!"

"Absolutely. I'm calling it _Star destroyer." _

"Fabulous. Listen, Minion, I have to go pick something up quick, I'll be back soon, hopefully."

Minion slid the tape measure back into its holder. "Pick something up? You don't… pick things up. You order them, or have me get them."

"Well, we're doing things a little different this time. Just give me the keys to the invisible car."

"this is about Kenobi again, isn't it?"

"Absolutely not." It was a bold-faced lie, and it hurt telling it to her friend. _Lying to Kenobi, now to Minion… what's next? Lying to _myself? _Maybe I already am…_

"You're wearing perfume. You _never _wear perfume."

"No. I'm not. Just give me the keys!" she snapped.

"I'll give you the keys when you give me the holo-watch."

"Minion! I am _not _going to meet with Kenobi. Don't be rid-i-cue-los."

"This is bad. Really bad- I think you've fallen in _love _with him!"

"Never! I hate the Jedi, you know that! Now give me the keys!"

"No." Minion responded. Minion had never outright refused her before, not since she was very little. "I can't let you do this. _Not _falling in love with the hostage is rule number one of villainy! Actually, strike that, it's rule number two. Rule number one is-"

"Don't mix vinegar and bleach," They finished together.

"That was a bad, bad day." Clverlight agreed. "Not my finest hour."

Minion, to his credit, didn't forget his point. "But rule two is that you don't fall in love with the hostage!"

"What about falling for the hero? Isn't that worse?"

Grievous brushed off her question. "That's an _unspoken_ rule. And I am not allowing you to go out with Kenobi! We have a battle tomorrow!"

"You're forgetting your place Minion. Give. Me. The. Keys!"

The keyring remained clenched tightly in Grievous's metal grip. "My place is to look after you."

"I don't _need _you to look after me!"

Minion suddenly froze, looking hurt. "You don't… need me?"

"You know what? No. Code: I don't need you looking after me."

"Code: fine." Minion dropped the keys at her feet and stormed across the room. "I'll just leave then!" He grabbed his fish flakes, his favorite CD, and his favorite statue, then glanced at Cleverlight, to see just what she'd make of this.

"Code: fine back!"

"Well good luck on your date then." Minion declared angrily as he left, statue tucked under his arm.

"I will." Cleverlight yelled back, her eyes welling with tears.

"That doesn't even make sense," Minion fired back. His final words as he walked out the door of Evil Lair.

"I know that…" _Minion… I didn't mean it! _Now she'd austricized him too.

She glanced at the clock halfheartedly. She was going to be late. The villainess stooped to pick up the caar keys, then twisted her watch dial. Brianna fizzled into view, staring back at her from the mirror on the car. _Forget everything. You are Brianna now._ She parked a few blocks from the restaurant in a no-parking zone, turning on the invisible shield. Then it was into the restaurant, hoping she'd made the right choice in coming.

~~~Obi-wan's apartment~~~

He was so, so close. Brianna's comment had been turning in his brain, and he cicled the cloud again. Nothing, nothing but those infernal hanging cards, forever turning. Nothing clicked.

"Ok, maybe I just need to take a step back." He muttered to no one in particular, with a glance at his clock. Almost time to leave. Wait a minute… a step back? Obi-wan stepped away from the cloud, viewing it from across the room. He could almost see a piture there! He opened his balcony door and stepped out. Fromm this distance… yes! There was a figure, a person in the cards. He couldn't tell what gender he/she was supposed to be, but he/she was wearing Jedi robes in the same gold, red, and white as the cards. The few blue around the edges were only a background. There was a word spelled out across the top… g-o-o-d. Good. Across the bottom was e-v-i-l, evil. Good vs. Evil? That was the message?

"Well hello." The voice startled him- after all, he was completely alone here. The voice was too high-pitched to be Clverlight's, although she was the first person he'd suspect of coming to his balcony.

He whipped around, hand reaching towards his lightsaber, just in case. "Who…?" Standing on the edge of his balcony was a woman- the woman shown in the cards. Gold robes, with red and blue.

"It's Obi-wan, right? No, who am I kidding, I know everything about you!" A mask covered some of the woman's face, but he got the feeling he knew her.

"Who exactly are you?"

"You'll know, in good time. For now, what do you say _we _go out for some fun?"

Obi-wan took a step back, about to explain to this peculiar person that he already had somewhere to be, but she abruptly hooked an arm around his waist and pulled him off the balcony. Suddenly he was plummeting down to the street below…

The woman caught him just before he hit the ground, tossing him from hand to hand like a rag doll. He had run out of breath for screams and now just breathed, in and out, in and out.

"Oh, I'm sorry, I didn't realize you didn't like flying!" The woman shouted over the sound of traffic.

Obi-wan suddenly remembered flying with Anakin- Anakin held him by the wrist and floated gently with him, as though they were a hot air balloon. Anakin was the balloon, and he was the basket, hanging below. "I like flying, but this is suicide!" He shouted. "Put me down. Right now."

"Ok, ok. Hold on." Obi-wan wasn't sure to be angry or terrified at those words, then lost all thought again as she flew _up. _They landed on top of Temple tower, and the woman released him.

"What are you doing?" Obi-wan asked, moving closer to the spike at the center of the tower. Being near the edge was damaging his already frayed nerves.

"Oh, just bringing you to the most _romantic _spot in the whole city. The name's Darth Maul, by the way."

"Who are you? Really?" Obi-wan demanded. He was late for his date, too.

"What does that matter? Surely it's enough to have a super-hot, super-awesome heroine to save you from Cleverlight? No? Ok, prepare for a shock." She removed the red mask from across her eyes, and Obi-wan couldn't believe _his _eyes.

"Hannah?"

"That's right. Isn't this awesome? Now you have someone to save you again! Me!"

"I… I…" To be honest, he had no idea what to say. Hannah, a hero? He couldn't imagine her putting up with Cleverlight, or saving a city, or saving _him _for crying out loud, because the girl apparently couldn't fly for anything.

"And if you want to get a lovey-dovey now, that's just fine with me, 'cause, you know…"

"No. Hannah,when I said put me down, I meant _down, _as in ground level."

"Aw, this is so cute! Our first fight." She cooed, eyes adoring.

"No! This is not cute, this is _not _about us, and I want to be put down."

Suddenly she looked shocked. "You mean, you don't want to be with me. Is that what you're saying? I'm good! I'm the hero!"

Obi-wan tried again to calm her down. "Yes, you're good. You're the hero. That doesn't automatically mean that we're together!"

"But I'm the _hero! _I'm supposed to get whoever I want! And I want _you!_" Her voice was growing colder. Angrier.

"You can't just tell other people what to do because you have superpowers!" It was the same argument he'd used a few times to keep Anakin in check, although admittedly, Anakin had never tried to _make_ a girl like him. To be honest, he hadn't had to. They fell over themselves for him.

"You're supposed to be with _me!_" She screamed. And with that, she took off. The force of her push-off shattered the windows in the observatory levels, and sent Obi-wan flying right over the edge of the tower.

One hand caught the edge of the top of the tower, and he clung there, afraid to look down. Ok, the observatory window were shattered. Maybe he could get in through them? His feet hung right into the window. But how to get in? He drew his lightsaber, then inched a little to the right, so that the window was to the left of him instead of directly below him.

Ok, so here goes nothing… He plunged the saber into the metal of the tower and let go with his other hand. The lightsaber slid down, cutting through the metal at a reasonable pace, and as he reached the windowsill, he grabbed it with his other hand and pulled himself up and safely into the observatory. Just in time too- a rumble of thunder sounded above him, and as the tallest building in JedihTem- _Jedi Temple, _the tower attracted a lot of lightning. He reached back out the window for his saber before heading for the elevator.

He couldn't wait to explain _these _developments to Brianna.

~~~Falcon Street Eats~~~

'Brianna' waitied at the table, nervous. What if he'd decided not to come? Because he discovered who she really was? It wasn't like Obi-wan Kenobi to be late…

"Sorry I'm so late." He announced, showing up out of nowhere to sit next to her.

"Oh, it's no trouble… your hair is very interesting today." She remakrked. He looked as though he'd stuck his head out of a car on the way here. "I like it."

Kenobi let out an amused laugh as a waiter set down two glasses of water. The man looked down his nose at Obi-wan, as though no-one should be _laughing _in a Christosian restaurant. "That's not all that's interesting. You won't believe what just happened to me…" Obi-wan proceeded to tell her the story of his experience with Hannah, and of how he'd seen her picture in the cards, and the words 'good' and 'evil'.

Cleverlight could only stare. The stupid girl had revealed herself to Obi-wan? What was _wrong _with her? Her identity was supposed to remain secret until tomorrow! "That's… startling."

"I know. And what's more, I think _Cleverlight_ gave her those powers!" Brianna practically gagged on her sip of water , spitting it back into the glass. Obi-wan continued, "She wants to play the game of good vs. evil, so she's created a new hero. But won't Hannah just kick her butt? I don't get it."

"Err…"

"And Hannah is the worst possible person to… Ar you alright?"

"Sure, just… inhaled some water. I'm okay." She lied. Obi-wan was not supposed to be _this _smart! "I'm sure we'll figure out who's given powers to who, and who's defeating who, but for now, how about we just… enjoy each other's company?"

How stupid of him. On their first real date, and he was obsessing over heros and villains. "Of course, Brianna." He lifted his water glass. "Here's to you, for being to the only _normal _thing in my messed up life."

Normal. That was all she really wanted to be. "Here's to… being normal." _May I succeed at it. _

Obi-wan clinked his glass against hers, a smile lighting his face. His eyes flickered briefly to the window across the room- something was moving, but… must just be the motion of the rain that now fell through the city.

"Obi-wan?" Brianna's voice was hesitant. "Would you still like me if… Assuming that you do like me of course… Would you still like me if I _wasn't _normal? Say I were caught in all this too, with the heroes and villains. Or say I was bald, or ugly… would you?"

"Of course." Obi-wan assured her. "It doesn't matter what people look like."

Brianna let out a breath she'd been holding. Maybe someday, she coulod tell him the truth. Someday…

"It matter what they do." Obi-wan finished.

Ouch. "That seems… a little trivial, don't you think?"

Obi-wan laughed gently. "Oh, Brianna." That was all he said. It was all he _had _to say.

He stood up, pushing his chair back. Brianna mimicked him, hoping that what she thought was coming, was coming. Sure enough, Obi-wan leaned forward across the table, and Brianna inclined towards him, meeting him. Human lips met 'human' lips, and Obi-wan's hand gently rested on top of hers on the tabletop. Brianna's mind jumped to the time he'd kissed her leaning over the desk, but she pushed that memory aside. She'd been Ventress then, and that would never happen again.

There was a gasp from the table next to him- hadn't they seen anyone kissing before? More gasps, screams, cries of terror- what was going on? He opened his eyes gently, then snapped them wider. His lips should have been touching Brianna's, his eyes looking at Brianna's eyelids, but instead he was pale, no, _white_ skin. His eyes darted to the lips that were still against his own. Red. The eyes in front of his opened. Brianna's eyes. But he knew where he had seen her eyes before now.

Obi-wan shoved her away. She fell back, landing in her chair. "What?" She asked, noticeing the look of shock on his face. Then she saw her own hands- gloved in black leather. "Augh! Don't look at me!" She commanded. Every other face in the restaurant obeyed, turning away from her, but Obi-wan's horrified eyes stayed glued to her as she faught with the watch. Obi-wan's hand must have bumped it! This was an absolute nightmare!

Warden. Space-mom. Past Brianna, too far, herself again. Warden. Space-mom. One more… Brianna. "Where were we?" She asked, hoping foolishly that he could forget the whole event.

"You." he stammered. "You!" He flung his water glass at her, and the watch shorted out, revealing who was really there: Cleverlight.

He ran out of the restaurant, leaving Ventress behind, surrounded by staring people. It only took a few moments to 'de-memorize' all of them, leaving them completely clueless about everything that had happened in the past five minutes.

_Obi-wan. Have to go after Obi-wan. _After sneaking out of the restaurant, she drove the invisible car towards his apartment, hoping he'd be somewhere between here and there. He was. The Jedi was walking home, in the rain, his hair now soaking wet and in his face.

She parked the car and dove out, getting herself thoroughly wet. Obi-wan, seeing her, turned around, walking the other way. Anything to escape her.

"Wait! Obi-wan, I can explain." She sounded desperate. Maybe she was desperate- she'd pushed aside everything else for this, and now it was gone.

"There's nothing to explain." Obi-wan crossed his arms, kept walking away.

"What about everything you just told me? About judging people by how they look?"

Obi-wan turned around for the first time. He was angry, but more so, he was hurt. "You judge them by their actions, remember? You've _killed _my Padawan, you've taken over my city, and now you're tricking me?" His blue eyes bored into hers, and she looked down uncomfortably. He was _right_. "_Why _are you so evil? Playing both sides, like a game, just to mess with me?" She wanted to protest, but there was nothing she could say. She hadn't _meant to. _She _never _wanted to hurt him.

Obi-wan continued with another question- "What could you possibly gain from this?" At that, she looked up, met his eyes for the first time. Were those _tears _on her face? Surely not, surely they were raindorps? Some tiny part of him, deep down, wanted to reach out and kiss her. In the rain. Passionately. Reassure her it was ok.

But it was _not _ok. She'd manipulated him, making him believe in fun, spirited Brianna. Now that he learned she didn't really exist, it was as if Cleverlight had killed her off too.

"Wait." She didn't do all this because she… liked him… did she? "I don't believe this." He whispered. "Did you really think I'd ever be with _you?_"

It was the most heartbreaking question he could have asked. "No." She turned away, walking slowly down the street, straight towards Evil Lair. She'd known, deep down, that she couldn't have Kenobi. He was too good for a villainess like her. It was a failure, just like everything else she'd ever attempted.

Obi-wan stood for a moment, rain trickling down off his hair and in front of his face. There was an empty feeling in his heart as he watched her leave, her platform boots splashing in the puddles. _I don't care, I don't care, I don't care… _He'd turned around now, going back to his apartment… He stopped to look back, just once, watching her walk away. No. That was over now. No Brianna, and most certainly no Cleverlight. He walked home in the rain.

~~~Evil Lair~~~

"Minion!" Cleverlight's voice echoed off the walls of the lair, but it hard to hear over the pounding rain on the metal roof. "Minion, are you here?" She thought he'd come back, because honestly, where else would he go? "Minion, I'm going to apologize now! I am _sorry. _You were right, I was… less right. We should stick to the one thing I'm good at. Being evil." There was no sound, no replying voice, just the pounding of the rain, and the steady _drip, drip _of water leaking out of her cape.

Nevermind then. She'd go it alone. She still had her Braindroids, after all, and a battle to prepare for.

**So, so melan-ka-lee! But I hope you'll forgive me for all the angst, I _did _throw in a few good kisses to lighten it up :3**

**Next... well, Cleverlight battles Maul!**


	15. Chapter 15: Chapter of five and ten

**Super awesome revelations sprinkle the WHOLE chapter. I hope you enjoy :3**

**The line about being unsure what to wallow in is 'borrowed' from MLP: FiM!**

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><p>~~~Saturday~~~<p>

The bold notes of her electric opening theme proceeded the robotic creation down the street, sending citizens scrambling for cover. A maniacal laugh projected from the speakers, but was practically drowned out by the screams of Jedi, and the smash of the metal feet against the pavement.

"I hear there's a new hero in town!" Cleverlight's voice sounded through the streets. "Who dares to challenge my reign?" It wasn't even remote controlled this time- it was puppetry. When Cleverlight's hands- in large metal gloves- moved, the robot's hands moved. From the cockpit of the creation, her voice came again: "Come out and fight me, if you can!"

Obi-wan flipped the TV off. He didn't _care_ if the reporter in him was curious. He wanted nothing to do with Cleverlight right now. Last night, he'd arrived home soaking wet, something that would have happened even if… if, well, Cleverlight hadn't ruined his life. Slight exaggeration, but then, it had felt like it. The first thing to meet his eyes was the thought cloud, the spinning cards. He tore them down from the ceiling. All of the cards that he and Brianna had hung so carefully, sharing conversation and laughter… it had felt years away.

Now, in the light, he could see that he'd missed one. A single blue card, hanging at eye level, remained. Scrawled on the front was only one thing- a single heart, in Ventress's handwriting.

He wanted to tear it down. Rip it off its string, rip the string down, but… he didn't have the heart- no pun intended. Last night replayed in his head: _"Did you really think I'd ever be with you?" _He hadn't meant it, hadn't meant to be so harsh towards the villainess. He'd seen the hurt in her eyes… had she really _liked _him?

~~~Meanwhile, at City Hall _aka Evil Lair part 2_~~~

Her theme song ended. The silence was deafening. No Hannah. Where was the 'hero'? Ventress sat down, the robot she controlled mimicking her. From here in the cockpit, she should be able to see the bright gold robes of the hero. She wasn't sure just how long the robot and herself sat on the steps of City Hall. She pushed her thoughts away whenever they drifted to Kenobi. _I won't ever be able to kidnap him again…_

_So how am I supposed to get this stupid hero to show up? Surely she's heard me. That's it. I'm going over there. _

Hannah was playing her ChosenOne video game again. This time, though, she didn't bother to rescue Obi-wan. In fact, she let him die. Several times. She beat up Cleverlight, but not with as much enthusiasm as before. Mostly, she just chased the citizens; broke as many things as the game would let her.

She wanted to go do this to the real town, but that would require effort. She didn't want to expend any more effort than what it took to keep her thumbs moving the controls.

_Slam! _A large metal fist broke through what remained of her window after she'd slammed through it herself. Cleverlight was there.

"Do you have any idea how long I've been _waiting?_" Hannah ignored the alien, eyes glazed. "Hello? Evil genius here?"

"Yeah, whatever."

"Aren't you going to challenge me?"

"For what?" Hannah dropped her controller.

"duh. For the city." Ventress sneered.

"Eh."

"Eh?"

"Eh."

That was when Asajj noticed a pile of money lying behind Hannah's sofa- _the money that she'd returned to the banks just a few days ago. _"where did you get all that?" she asked, suspicion in her voice rising.

The Padawan shrugged. "Stole it."

"No!" Ventress gasped. "Heroes don't steal!"

"So?" Stealing the cash had made her feel better after Obi-wan rejected her. _Just look what I have. I don't need you Obi-wan. And you know what happens to people I don't need? _She'd thrown a bag of the money, hard. She didn't know where it came down. Maybe it didn't.

"So?" Ventress questioned, angrily. "You can't just do that!"

"Look." Hannah stood up as she spoke, "I don't want to be a hero. It's too much work, and effort, and what do I get out of it? The villain route is the easy one." Ventress frowned. _No. Anakin always had it so easy. _I've _had to work hard to do anything and everything._

"I only gave it a shot to get Obi-wan-"

"Wait… Obi-wan? As in, your master? You want to… _get _him?" _Oh, crap. She likes Obi-wan? _

"Yeah. Stupid jerk couldn't care less. I saw him having dinner last night with some delicate little nerd." _Brianna… Oh, I messed it up more than I thought…_

Hannah continued. "Now, I can have whatever I want, and no one will get in my way. I don't have to rescue stupid citizens." _Like Obi-wan. I want to kill that guy…_

"No! You're the hero! I made you to fight _evil!"_

"Made me?" Hannah stared blankly. "What are you talking about?"

Ventress flicked her watch irritably. "I'm your precious Space-mom."

"No!" _That dirty little… I'll kill her for tricking me!_

"Yes!" Ventress declared gleefully, glad that the girl was finally going to chase her. "And you know what else? I'm the delicate nerd!" She turned the dial again, revealing Brianna.

"No!" _She dares go after _my _boyfriend? I may not want him anymore, but Obi-wan is MINE!_

"Yes!" Ventress asserted, resuming her normal form. "Oh, and at dinner last night? We were _kissing." _She gloated, hoping that this would make the hero give chase.

Maul let out a growl of anger, "When I get my hands on you…"

Ventress was back in the cockpit of her suit in a heartbeat, ready for one of the best battles of her life. She got it. Back and forth they paried, Hannah slamming the suit against the ground, and the nearby buildings, Asajj sending the 'hero' flying through the air as though swatting a fly. Asajj led the fight away from the Temple, where the Jedi still hid, back towards City hall. Both of them had acquired lamp poles to use as swords- Ventress held one in each hand, but Hannah was winning anyway, driving her backwards. And that was as it should be- the hero won. Maybe a bit of winning would turn her back to the light.

"How about a bit of banter? You can go first!" Ventress offered, half shouting over the sounds of the fight.

"Aaaaauuuuuuggggghhhhh!" screamed Maul, delivering a hard slap that sent her device flying backwards. _Ok, no real way to respond to _that…

As the device powered down from the sheer strength of the blow, Maul shattered the glass to the cockpit, hurricane strength and all, and grabbed Ventress by the throat.

"Excellent, excellent." Ventress choked out. "Very good for a first battle. The banter could use work, but that's alright. You can take me to jail now," she gasped.

"Jail? You think I'm taking you to jail, you little dweeb? You're _dead_! I'm going to _kill _you!" Maul's fist drew back, Asajj scrambled, horrified, and managed to lay her hand on a certain button on the control panel- eject. 'Hero' and villainess flew through the air- but at least Hannah had let go of her throat now. Two braindroids caught her before she hit the pavement, but the weight was too much for them. They dropped her from only a few feet high, and she tumbled to the ground, unhurt.

Hannah floated towards her, eyes burning. They had become _yellow, _like the eyes of a sith. "The dome!" Ventress yelped, and sure enough, the braindroids obeyed, a group of four slamming a huge metal dome over Maul. Ventress, pulling herself to her feet, managed a short laugh.

"You know what? That dome is made of brass. Your weakness. It's the same metal that was lining the dome that trapped ChosenOne!" She chuckled, resting her arm against the dome. Stupid hero couldn't get to her now. She could just defuse… Oh crap. The defuser ray! She'd left it in the back seat of the invisible car! And the invisible car was… where again? Great. Now she'd have to go search the streets for the invisible car. At least the dome would hold Hannah in the meantime…

Hannah's fist slammed straight through the brass dome. "I… don't… have… a weakness!"

Vntress stared, spluttering. How was ChosenOne's weakness _not _Maul's? She'd researched the debris of the abandoned observatory, discovered the brass lining, and known that it must be Skywalker's weakness. After all, he'd lifted steel, iron, stone, and wood before. But if Hannah had Anakin's powers, she must have his weakness, right?

Wrong. Hannah lifted the dome up and threw it- straight at Cleverlight. She only barely avoided getting hit like a bowling pin- she had to dive down a stairway. The citizens, watching, began to cheer. The 'hero' had defeated Cleverlight!

Padme stepped forward. "Thank you, new hero! You have freed us! What's your name?"

"It's Darth Maul. And I would say you're free just yet."

"Of course. Cleverlight is still at large." The warden agreed.

"No. _I'm_ the new overlord in town." With one swipe of her hand, she sent both Padme and the warden flying backwards- they were caught by members of the crowd, luckily.

~~~Obi-wan's rooms in the Temple~~~

He didn't want company. He wanted to wallow in… Oh _great, _he didn't even know what he was supposed to wallow in. So _of course_, the doorbell rang. He was tempted to ignore it, but whoever it was wouldn't be ignored. Ding-dong. Ding-dong. _Ding-dong, ding-dong, ding-dong. _Finally he gave up and opened the door.

"Why didn't brass stop her? It should have stopped her, I don't understa-" Ventress had begun to enter, talking quickly, half to herself, then stopped, realizing about… well, about everything. "I'm sorry, I'll just…" She almost cowered, backing towards the door.

"Why are you here?"

"Because you're smart. Sometimes smarter than me."

It must have taken a lot for her to say something like that. "Come in." he sighed. Ventress straightened up, then darted in.

"I don't get it! She wasn't even affected!"

"What are you talking about?"

"First battle with Hannah today. I… I got my butt kicked, okay?" Her confession was greeted by the slightest upwards twitch of his lips. "But then she didn't take me to jail, she tried to murder me! I barely escaped and-"

She trailed off, noting the look on his face. He looked… upset by this. Maybe he wasn't ready to see her killed. Maybe that wouldn't make him happy. Or was it just that he didn't want his Padawan to be a murderer?

"And?" he prompted.

"I stopped her with brass. Brass," she explained, "Was the metal that contained ChosenOne. So, since I gave Hannah ChosenOne's powers, I thought she'd have his weakness. That way nothing could get out of hand."

"Why did you want to-"

"I'll explain later. Now we just need to get out of here."

"Why?"

"I'm worried Hannah will come here. And kill you."

"Kill me? She wouldn't do that."

Ventress shuffled her feet. "She's mad that you rejected her, but she's _more _mad that you chose me over her."

"Brianna." He said slowly. "But how does she know that you're Brianna?"

"That… was me. Just leave, ok? I don't want anything to happen to you." Obi-wan nodded.

She… cared what happened to him. He'd rejected Hannah, now she wanted to kill him; he'd rejected Ventress, and she was worried about him getting hurt, despite the bruise that was obviously blossoming on her shoulder- her sleeve was torn almost off.

"Oh, and can we take your car? I kind of lost mine."

~~~the news van~~~

"So why exactly are we going to Anakin's house?"

"I need some answers. And that's the only place I can find them." Ventress answered from the passenger seat.

"So, why _did _you give her the powers? Can't you just remove them?"

"There was no challenge to my life anymore, no purpose. I needed someone to fight, or else… I'm just… a lonely dic-tate-or. I have everything, so there's nothing to reach for." She sighed. "I don't expect you to understand, Minion didn't either."

Obi-wan's eyes were still focused on the roads, but he was nodding. "I get it." Pause. "Where is Minion, anyway?"

"We fought. And he ran away." She pushed back the tears that came with that memory- Minion _would _come back. She knew it.

"Were you, by any chance, fighting about… me?"

"Yes."

Obi-wan coul sense the conversation getting painful, so he attempted to steer it to a safer topic. "And you can't just remove these powers?"

"No, I lost the defuser ray when I lost the invisible car."

"How do you lose something like a car?"

Ventress gave him a quick scathing look, but he missed it. "It's invisible."

There was silence for a minute while Obi-wan indulged in a mental facepalm.

"And I left it in the street somewhere last night when you dumped me. Alone. In the rain. And the dark." Wisps of guilt began building up in his mind. "Did you… look back?"

He shoved them away. "No!" He hit the brakes a _lot _harder than he'd meant to. Ventress, who had never bothered with seatbelts before- safety system in the invisible care was _phen-oh-nom-in-al_- flew forward and slammed her head against the windshield.

"Owwwww, my head! My poor brain!" She flung the door of the van open and tumbled out, her hands clutching her forehead.

"We're here." Obi-wan said unnecisarily. Ventress straightened up, head still throbbing. "Anakin left his quarters to stay in this place."

"This place?" To be honest, the place looked like a run-down mess. She couldn't imagine Skywalker wanting to live here.

"He's done quite a bit of work here, I believe. Come on." There was a haunted, abandoned feel to the building, Obi-wan noted as he used his lightsaber to cut away the locked doorknob from the door. The room was filled with dust and cobwebs, old broken furniture, a half-broken staircase going up, and a cement staircase going down.

"He keeps it like this so that people won't suspect that someone lives here." Obi-wan explained as they descended the concrete staircase. "The living quarters are quite nice… or at least, they used to be. No one's been here in a while, and very few even know it exists. I wouldn't be surprised if it's become…" He trailed off as they swung open the door to reveal an impeccable living room, lit up, filled with furniture and artwork and not a speck of dust.

"Ok, look for anything made of brass."

Obi-wan obeyed, wandering around the impeccable room, until he spotted something a little odd. There was a soda sitting on the table, in a glass. There were bubbles up the sides, and ice floating on top. "Ventress? Look at this."

She was at his side in a second, looking excited, then crestfallen. "Obi-wan, that's glass. I said _brass." _

"Look at the ice."

She gave him a strange look. "Yes, the solid form of water."

"No, I mean, no one's been here for a good two weeks at least. The ice hasn't melted, and the soda isn't flat."

"You're… right. Someone must have been here recently or-"

"What are you doing in my living room?"

Obi-wan and Ventress whipped around. Behind them stood Anakin Skywalker.

**Hahaha! didn't see that coming, did you?  
>Ok, so maybe it wasn't that hard to predict, but still...<strong>


	16. Chapter 16: Chapter of almost the end!

I'm am TERRIBLY sorry about the wait. You know that weird, other dimension known as 'real life'? It's kinda been busy lately. ((Not to mention that I got WAY too sucked into this online Halloween candy hunt game...))

Anyway, please read and enjoy... according to my plans, there should be TWO more chapters after this one, and if you STILL want more, there may be a sequel. Let me know in your reviews please!

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><p>"How…?"<p>

"What…?

"Anakin…?"

"I know, I know. You have a lot of questions, Master. But… why are you here, exactly? And why the hoth are you with _her?" _

"You're dead. I _killed _you. I… don't understand." And the thing that Ventress hated, more than anything else, was not understanding.

"I should explain, shouldn't I?"

*Flashback!*

"It was the day I got my own museum. Everyone was so happy for me, and it hit me that I _wasn't _happy. I should be so thrilled about this, but instead, it just seemed… pointless. Another way for people to practically worship me. I knew I had to go rescue you, Obi-wan, but I wanted time to think. So I used my superspeed to leave the dome mid-speech."

Ventress cut into the middle of his flashback. "Whoa, wait, you _left _for some of that time?"

"Yeah. I flew all over the town, just thinking. It was then that I realized that all the citizens here were happy, and I wasn't for a reason: They chose their own lives and futures. I was stuck in this position, as hero. We would do the same thing over and over, and the people would love me for it."

"If you have superspeeed such that we can't even _see _you, why didn't you just come untie Obi-wan?"

Anakin shrugged. "Where's the fun in that?"

"You wanted to see my schemes go down in flames, didn't you?"

"Well, it _is _pretty funny. But anyway, it was then that I decided that I didn't want to be the hero anymore. Everyone assumed I would be- you know, because of the powers. But you can't just _quit _the hero gig. So it was then I decided to fake my death."

"You could have mentioned that to me." said Obi-wan.

"I didn't want _anyone _to know, so my secret would be safe- well, anyone except my wife, of course. She's the reason I left."

"Wife?" Obi-wan choked out. "You've been gone for only a few weeks and you're already married?"

"Well, we were dating for a long time beforehand, and I didn't want to tell anyone, because you-" he gestured to Cleverlight- "would have kidnapped her, and I wanted to avoid that."

Obi-wan was still a bit confused. "But who is-"

"Anakin!" A voice called from somewhere else in the house. "Anakin, did you write a grocery list?"

"Honey, Obi-wan's here!"

"Obi-wan?" At that moment, Mayor Amidala walked into the living room. "Oh. Nice to see you. Why exactly are you _here?"_

"I'd ask the same question, only it seems that you're _married _to Anakin."

Ventress cut in. "Look, I'm sure this is all _very _interesting, but can you continue to the part where you pretend to die?"

"Oh. Well, I pretended that something in the dome was causing a loss of powers, then using my super speed, I escaped just before your death ray hit. Added my cape to a fake skeleton I borrowed from a doctor's school, then _boom! _Chosen One was dead. And I, Anakin Skywalker, was free to live a normal life with my beloved Padme."

"Ok. That's nice. But in case you haven't noticed, there's a super powered mad woman on the loose, so we'd app-ir-eas-ee-ate if you'd help us deal with her."

"No can do, little freak. See, I don't leave my house. At all. Ever."

Padme nodded. "It's true. I do all the shopping, continue my normal work schedule, and Anakin keeps this place in good order."

"I know." Obi-wan took up the argument for Ventress, who looked irritated at having been called 'little freak'. "But can you maybe make an exception?"

"I can't. It'd ruin my whole life if they knew I was alive. You two can handle it. The rest of the city can handle it, for that matter."

"But-"

"No buts." There was a finality in his voice that sealed their fate.

Obi-wan and Ventress left. They had their answers, but they were all the wrong answers. Anakin was alive, but he didn't have any weaknesses. _Great._

"Ok, we can still do this." Obi-wan decided. "We'll get some stuff from the lair first, weopons and armor-"

"We can't. I can't." Ventress sighed.

Kenobi paused to stare at her for a moment. "What do you mean you can't? You're a genius. You're-"

"I'm a failure. Everything I do backfires, or just doesn't work. I can't do it."

"But… Hannah is out there destroying the city! You can't just _not _try to stop her!"

"She's _invincible. _Nothing I do can stop her. Look, I want you to stay here, with Anakin. That way if she comes for you, Anakin can stop her."

Obi-wan bit his lip. "And what about you? Where are you going to go?"

"Home. If she finds me, well… so be it."

"No. Ventress, I know you can do this! You're the smartest person _I _know. You're a genius, and…"

"Kenobi. Nothing I do ever ends up right. I was a terrible villainess, a terrible overlord, and I can't be a hero. I'm _evil. _And the evil one doesn't win. I don't 'save the day'. That's for heroes, for good people, like him." She jerked her head in the direction of Anakin's house. Asajj swallowed. "And good people like you." Her eyes moved to the ground. "I'm not even supposed to _have _feelings, and I messed that up too."

She did have feelings for him then. But she thought of it as a mistake, another failure in her life. "Ventress…"

"I mean it. Stay here. I don't want her murdering you."

"But she'll kill you, too, and I'm not standing by aimlessly while my crazy Padawan slaughters my-" He broke off awkwardly. He'd almost blurted out 'girlfriend'.

"At least I'd deserve it." She walked slowly away from Anakin's house, down the hill. Away from him. He couldn't believe that she was just giving up like this. Ventress was not a quitter. _Very well then. If she's not doing anything, then I am. And maybe, just maybe, I can get her to do something in the process… if she feels how I think she does. _

~~~News van, downtown Jedi Temple~~~

"Listeners are advised to avoid the downtown area altogether. Flames have overcome most of the city here, and the destruction is unbelievable." _Oh, I believe it…_ Obi-wan thought, looking out the window. The radio broadcast was continuing, again warning residents to leave the city if possible, but he slapped it off. He was too far in to leave now.

Piles of rubble blocked the car. He'd have to walk the rest of the way. Obi-wan parked and got out, eyes scanning the area. Hannah had done all this? Almost every building was broken in some way, and chunks of metal and cement littered the ground. Puddles of oil burned, the flame bright against the darkness of the destruction around it. Long scorch marks in the ground indicated where she'd flown above and dragged her saber, destroying as much stuff as possible.

_And I am about to try to _talk _to this maniac… _"Hannah!" He barely had time to get out more than that before she slammed down to the ground in front of him, her boots denting the concrete.

"Master." The voice was very different, holding none of the worshipful tone she'd once placed upon the word. "What are you doing here?"

"I'm here to end this madness."

Her face twisted into a frightening smile. "So you think that if you agree to date me, I'll leave your precious city alone? Is that what you think?"

To be honest, it was what Obi-wan had been hoping. To end this destruction, he'd feign affection, at least for long enough to find the defuser ray.

"Well you're wrong. I don't want you anymore. I deserve better then someone like you, someone who'll rip out my heart because of Cleverlight!"

"Hannah, look, this has nothing to do with Cleverlight. This is me, as your master, asking you to stop this. You're better than this! I…" She stormed towards him, eyes burning.

"You think you can talk me out of it, huh? Wrong again. This, Kenobi, is what happens to people who don't give me what I want." Her hand suddenly grabbed his robe front and hoisted him off his feet. This was the end, he was going to be thrown sky-high…

"Wait… Two birds with one stone…" Hannah suddenly flew straight up, bringing him with her. They stopped in the place he last remembered being with her- the top of Temple Tower.

"You're used to being bait, right?" She let the question hang for a moment while she dove to the ground and returned in a split-second holding a stop sign. "So this'll be completely natural for you." Without another word, his Padawan had bent the sign pole around his arms and chest, binding him to the metal spike on top of the tower. _At least it's not storming anymore… I'd make a perfect lightning rod._

"Hannah… Why exactly-" She cut him off again.

"I went through all this 'hero' crap for you. and then you turn me down for… for the freak? It's not right!"

"There isn't anything between me and Cleverlight!" That there was a boldfaced, caps-lock lie. There was _everything _between him and Cleverlight.

"You know, it doesn't even matter. I still want her dead. I still want you dead."

"Why? Hannah, I'm your master. You should list-"

"Don't even try. Now, for live feed…" She suddenly had a camera. He blamed it on super-speed.

"But why destroy the city? I mean, kill me, sure, but why all this pointless mess?"

She paused her fiddling to look at him and grin wickedly. "Because I _can." _

~~~Jedi Temple prison~~~

Because the crime rates in JedihTemple were so low, most people were surprised to see that the place had a prison- and that it was pretty darn full. The reason, for the most part, was that Skywlaker caught the evildoers, something far easier for him to do than the police. Very few people were repeat offenders- Anakin could be quite scary. One of the few was Cleverlight.

Today she didn't need Anakin to turn her in. She was turning herself in.

The warden wasn't there. The gaurds, for lack of any better idea what to do with her, had locked her away in her old cell, the one painted with bright pink flowers. She wanted to shut it all out, forget about what was going on. Obi-wan was with Anakin, that made him safe, Minion… _Oh Grievous, I miss you._

When would Hannah give up the search? She couldn't take not knowing- much like a child playing hide and seek who peeks around the corner to see if they've been spotted and then is caught because their head is peeking around the corner. Asajj flicked on the TV. She'd hoped that the last place Hannah would look would be jail.

"-portant message for you." Ventress stopped channel-surfing at Hannah's voice, dread filling her heart. "See this guy here? Behind me?" The camera zoomed jerkily out, showing that tied to the metal spike atop Temple Tower was Obi-wan. "This is the guy who broke my heart. So now, he's going to be tied to the top of Temple Tower- while I tear it down."

_No! _This was all her fault! If it wasn't for her, and her stupid feelings, and the fact that she'd given this nut powers (inadvertantly, but still), Obi-wan would be safely inside the Temple, rather than tied to its tower.

"And I'm going to start the destruction in _one _hour. I mean it." There was no mistaking the meaning. It was a direct call to her- one hour to get over there… or else. "Any last words?" The camera zoomed jerkily in towards Kenobi- was that a _sign pole _holding him to the tower?

"Cleverlight… I know you can do this. Even if it's too late for me, this city needs you." The Jedi looked choked with emotion as he continued: "I know this seems impossible, but that's what I always liked about you- you never gave up." He paused. "And I…"

"That's enough." Hannah snapped roughly. It was likely that the sentiment was getting too much for her. The camera went dead, and the usual programming of the local station continued.

Asajj leapt from her chair and bolted to the door of the cell. _Locked. _Of course. "Warden? Anyone?" she shouted, hoping someone would respond.

To her surprise, Warden Windu was suddenly at the door. "What do you want, Cleverlight?"

"Warden! You need to let me out! Obi-wan's tied to the top of a-"

"No. You have 88 sentences to live out."

"You don't get this! I have an hour before he hits the ground!" _Qui-gon'll kill you… _

"I can't let a dangerous prisoner out of here. Breaks all the rules in the book." She wouldn't be able to take being in this cage anymore- not while something like this happened!

"Warden, listen, please! I… am… sorry. I know, you can't just let me out. But don't make Obi-wan pay for what I've done. Don't make this city pay. I might have a shadow of a chance at stopping this destruction… I'll come back when I'm finished?"

"No."

Her heart sank. It was her own fault that she'd now have to sit here for an hour while Obi-wan was killed. It was her fault he was being killed. "I know." She sighed. "I'm an awful person. I'm responsible for Obi-wan's death. And for Minion's too, if he's dead."

"I'm right here." Grievous? She whipped around just in time to see Warden tap his watch. His form faded away and was replaced by…

"Minion!" Cleverlight's face lit up.

"Come on, little buddy." Minion opened the cell door. "We've got an hour. Let's go."

"I take it you forgive me? I do need you Minion. You're…"

"Apology accepted. Now, let's go break Rule two."

"The second thermodynamic law?" Her brow furrowed. "I think that's impossible."

Minion grinned. "The rules of evil? Rule two? Right after-"

"Don't mix vinegar and bleach, I remember." She smiled back. "Pretty convincing Windu imitation. You got me this time."

~~~JedihTemple Tower, approximately one hour later~~~

"Looks like your precious little alien doesn't care about you all that much. See, if you'd picked _me, _you'd be safe from anything like this. But it's too late for that now."

"If it weren't for you, I wouldn't _be _in this mess." This was another line he'd frequently said to Anakin. Anakin… He wondered briefly if maybe, just maybe, Anakin would swoop in at the last second and save him. As much as he wanted Cleverlight to rescue him, he was starting to get a bit edgy, and beggars couldn't be choosers.

"Her times up. I guess she's a little busy saving her own skin." _Please come back Ventress! Even if it's too late, I'd rather not have to eat my own words… and then die._

"Now for a little fun." Hannah took off, diving down to the base of the tower and slamming her fists into it. The tower, weakened, began to lean slowly. Hannah slammed into it again, and the Tower tilted faster.

The sounds of destruction were interrupted, however, by a familiar tune, coming from a cloud of dark smoke high above him. Glowing lights filled the cloud- braindroids. More of the little creatures swarmed down towards the falling tower and caught it, slowing the tilt. And there, standing upon the cloud, supported by her creations, cape in tatters, was Ventress. And she was _beautiful_.

"You dare to challenge my reign of this city? You _dare _to take _my _reporter? Well, little miss hero, you're in for it now!" Cleverlight did indeed look threatening, perched there upon her cloud of robots, voice magnified over the music to fill the whole area.

"You see?" he responded to Hannah, "I told you she'd come."

Hannah looked pleased- dangerously pleased. "Don't you get it? This isn't about you, or your insignificant life. This was to lure the rat-" She nodded towards Cleverlight- "Out of her hole. And now you both die."

**Luckily for you, the next chapter is already about halfway finished. Should be up soon :)**


	17. Chapter 17: Almost finished

**I told you it'd be fast. When I uploaded the last chapter, about half of this was already typed, because it was supposed to be part of the last chapter. However, it wasn't flowing nicely, so I just chopped it here, and started a fresh chapter.**

**Once again, not my characters, nor my plot, just my writing. The sequel, if it ever occurs, is my own plot, so expect it to take a little longer.**

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><p>"There can only be one supervillain around here, and that's me!" Hannah shouted.<p>

"Oh, that's quite amusing." Cleverlight's voice echoed off the buildings all around. "But you know, I'll give you a chance to surrender. Hand over Kenobi, and I'll let you off."

"You want Kenobi? Then go get him!" Hannah kicked the tower, and despite the best efforts of the braindroids, it began to fall again.

In a split second, Ventress leapt from her cloud of braindroids onto a waiting… hoverbike? She reved the engine and shot towards him just as Hannah lunged for where she'd once been. The 'cloud' of braindroids formed themselves into a sphere around Maul, giving Cleverlight a little more time.

"Lightsaber!" The hoverbike was at his side, and Ventress passed him a red blade which he used to cut his way out of the sign post. There was a horrifying second of being in mid-air, then he was on the bike, clutching the handles at his sides.

"What's the _rest _of the plan?" He managed to shout over the sound of loud music and louder rushing wind.

"Basically," The bike shot forward as she talked, "We avoid dying."

"That's a good plan. I like that plan." Obi-wan yelped, wrapping his arms around her waist to avoid flying off. Hannah had escaped her prison of braindroids and had gone back to the tower. Instead of pushing it, however, she had ripped it _out of the ground_ and hoisted it high, turning it around towards the hoverbike…

"Drive faster!" Obi-wan urged.

"It doesn't _go _any faster!" Hannah threw the massive tower, and the top of the metal spike hit the very back of the bike. The vehicle jolted and jerked then started to _slow down. _The tower was sliding through the street now, metal spire getting closer and closer…

"Jump!" Ventress yelled.

"Jump?"

"The canopy!" Up ahead and rapidly getting closer was a large fabric canopy over a doorway, the kind that shaded the entrance from rain and sun. The bike veared in closer, and he leapt.

He hit the canopy, then rolled off and hit the ground. It hurt, but he was safely back on solid ground. Ventress was losing distance- the tower was slowing, but the bike slowed faster. It was no longer hovering, but scraping along the ground- a chunk of concrete sent it flying, the tower gained…

He couldn't see. The tower had come to a stop, but he had no idea if it had hit her; the main body of the tower was blocking his view. Through the shattered window panes, he could see the remains of rooms- rooms that had once been part of the Temple.

"That was almost _too _easy." He whipped around to see Hannah land. "One down, one to go."

"She won. She got me safely down." He stammered.

Hannah put a hand over her heart. "And gave her life in the process. How tragic." She mocked.

"No!" She could not be dead, she wasn't dead… it was his fault if she was…

"Bye-bye." Hannah sneered, then kicked a huge metal beam, sending it straight towards him. There was no escape, a building on one side, Temple Tower, laying on its side, blocked off any other escape. This was his end, too…

A hand caught the back of his robes and yanked him into the air, the beam sailing below his feet, missing by inches. He was back on the ground again, just as fast, and looked behind him to see a true sight for sore eyes.

"Anakin!"

His Padawan grinned down at him. "Glad to see you're alright, Obi-wan. And… thanks. For the inspiration." His eyes snapped to Hannah. "Now, I hear you're the one destroying the Temple."

There was fear on Maul's face for the first time. "I… I thought you were dead…"

"I'm quite alive. And, thankfully, so is Obi-wan. Care to tell me why he was tied to Temple Tower?" His brow furrowed.

"It's, uh, a really long story, kinda funny actually, heh heh…" Hannah was rapidly backing away, tripping over rubble.

"Get. Back. Here." Anakin ordered. Hannah took off like a shot, and Anakin flew right after her, fists clenched, leaving Obi-wan grounded- thank goodness. He'd prefer to stay on the ground again for quite some time after the Tower scare.

The Tower… Ventress…

"Cleverlight!" He broke into a run, backtracking around the tower then moving towards where it had stopped- the fountain in the center of town. He leapt the broken remains of the bike before he saw the scene he'd been dreading. The Tower had stopped at the edge of the fountain, pinning Ventress between the stone fountain edge and the metal spike. She was pierced straight through the heart.

She was dead.

No questioning about it, no one could survive. He ran to her side anyway. "Ventress?" Her eyes opened.

"Kenobi."

"I'm so sorry…" Startlingly, she raised a hand to stop him, then tapped her watch.

"Minion?"

"Surprise." The fish cheered weakly. The spike had indeed stabbed him through the heart… but his body was _metal. _Wires sparked, pieces were crunched, and the dome perched atop his body was broken, but the fish inside was perfectly safe. _Brilliant… absolutely brilliant… _

"She's right where you'd least expect her to be." The fish finished with a grin.

~~~Ventress's POV~~~

The jetpack worked like a dream: cornering nicely, stopping on a dime- a perfect imitation of flight- Anakin's flight, to be exact. Hannah fled, believing it to be ChosenOne hot on her tail instead of the other alien. Finally she managed to catch the coward by shooting forward, then looping around and backtracking. The girl slammed right into her, and she managed to grab her by the front of her robes- payback.

"No, I didn't mean it, I swear!" Maul whimpered. "Please don't kill me?"

"I'll let you off- this time." Her voice was deep, like Anakin's. "Just get out of JedihTemple. And never return!"

"O-ok." She stammered.

"And if I hear of you destroying any more buildings _anywhere else, _I will find you. Got it?

"You got it Mister ChosenOne sir." Ventress released her collar, and the ex-Jedi flew off, leaving the city behind.

Ventress circled back to the center of town, desperately hoping that the _rest _of the plan had gone just as well. _If Obi-wan or Minion didn't survive… it's my fault. All my fault…_

Minion's disguise was off- It was highly probable that the watch had been broken. Obi-wan, where was Obi-wan… There. She slowly lowered herself down, feeling almost… hesitant. She wouldn't blame him if was angry. She'd fallen back on deception. _Old habits die hard?_

She landed in front of him, looking down from Anakin's height. He held out his hand, face… impossible to read. She paused, unsure, and then he reached out and grabbed her wrist, tapping the watch surface.

"You scared me." Pause. "I thought you were dead."

"Surprise?" Asajj whispered hopefully.

"That was amazing." He said, his head tilting slightly to the right. She hurridly mirrored him, not wanting to break eye contact, but then he'd suddenly jerked his head to the left and kissed her.

The few citizens who had watched Anakin Skywalker fizzle away with disappointment now gasped audibly, and Ventress took note of this with a portion of her complex mind. They must be quite a sight, after all- one human, the other not quite, kissing amidst the destruction...

"Sneaky of you." _No… _She and Obi-wan tore apart as she spun to see Hannah there once again. "But there's only one person stupid enough to call this place 'JedihTemple', and it isn't Anakin Skywalker."

_Oh, I'm so stupid, so… verbally chah-lahn-ged. _"Oops…"

Obi-wan stepped in front of her defensively, drawing his blade. "Don't touch her." Maul's hand flew out, and within an instant, her Jedi was flung halfway across the city center.

Kenobi jerked his head up, reaching for his- no, Ventress's- saber as an automatic reflex. It was there, under his hand, but it was broken. Maul had lifted Ventress into the air by her throat- there had to be some way he could help her! His eyes caught on a broken sign post. It'd have to do.

Wait… why was he about to use a street sign as a weapon against someone who could send him flying with a simple brush of her hand, and who had earlier bent a similar sign around him? Because she had Ventress, that was why. And if he and Cleverlight could keep distracting her, back and forth, maybe they'd both get out alive.

_Oh Cleverlight, you villainous, troubnlemaking, overlydramatic, wonderful, wonderful woman. You may be my kidnapper, but I'm not going to let Hannah kill you. _He stepped towards the two villains, but as he did, he noticed something a block or so away, something that shimmered slightly, reflecting the light in certain places. It was almost like one of those visible heat waves, only shaped like… a car…

"You made a fool of me, pretending to be ChosenOne!" Maul's hand gripped her shirt front a little tighter. "You made me look like a coward!"

"I didn't make you _look _like a coward." She managed to choke out. "I exposed who you really were." _With all this power, I can see who you really are, Hannah. You're nothing but a bully._

"Liar!" Maul threw her across the intersection, forgetting the convenient jetpack still on the alien's back. Cleverlight looped upwards, just in time to avoid a car thrown right at her. After that, it was into a round of 'dodge-the-flying-objects-thrown-at-you-by-a-crazy-villain'.

"Ventress!" Her focus jerked to behind Hannah and an incoming fire hydrant, to Obi-wan. "Ventress, remember last night?"

"Yes, I remem-" She broke off to doge a motorcycle, "remember last night. Why are you bring-" piece of fencing, "bringing this up now?"

"I looked back at you."

"You did?"

"Yes. Now I need you to look back."

"At the past?"

"No, in the present. Look back!"

She leaped a metal beam, then spared a quick glance over her shoulder. The car! "I get it!" She yelped, but her words were cut off as she was hit by a thrown bicycle. The force was enough to break the jetback, a piece disconnecting and hitting the ground.

No! Without the jetpack, she'd have to make it to the car, all by herself, on foot… Suddenly Maul had her again. "Now you'll pay." She snarled, fist drawing back. Ventress swallowed. She'd seen that fist slice through solid metal like it was butter. So what would it do to someone like her?

"Pay for what?" she responded cheekily. "For gifting you powers? For the fact that Obi-wan didn't want you?"

"For ruining my life. If you hadn't taken over this city, Obi-wan would have been with _me. _Of his own choice, not to save you."

"So you're going to… kill me?"

"Eventually, yes." With that, Hannah punched her, aiming for her face. Ventress managed to bring an arm up, but the sheer force of the blow sent her tumbling backwards… closer to the car! Her arm throbbed with pain, but she'd make it. For the sake of everyone in the city, maybe the world, _she would get to that car. _She staggared towards it, trying very hard to maintain a standing position…

"You're pathetic." Maul taunted- from a distance. She had a little time, but was it enough? "Good or bad, you always lose." That one hurt. Because it was true.

Hannah was coming up behind her, fists clenched. Kenobi stopped hesitating, ran forward, and brought his street sign down over her head. It _clanged _as though he'd hit something metal, and the sign post bent around her head. She whirled, angry.

"Are you trying to get yourself killed? Because you're doing a-" one fist swung towards him, he ducked, "good," other fist swung, "job!"

"No, I'm just trying to keep you from murdering-"

"Face it _Master, _you fell into her little web of tricks. Lies. You actually think she has a soft side? That she cares anything for you?"

"Well…" _Stall her a little longer… _Ventress had almost made it to the car door… "She's..."

"She's just using you. _I _would have been perfect to you. But you're too late. And now I'm going to break your little heart, just like you did. To me." There was no tone of hurt in her voice, only anger. "And once you've watched her die, I'll kill you." There was nothing more to say to that- she'd already turned, and seen that Cleverlight was slinking away.

"Hey!" As the shout reached her ears, Asajj made a wild leap for the car door, whipped it open, and closed it behind her. Maul stood still for a moment, confused as to the fact that her advisory had disappeared into thin air.

Ok, infuser, infuser… She found it in the back seat, and flicked it to 'defuse'. The light-up screen flashed to life, but rather than 'defuse', it instead showed…

"Warming up? Seriously? _Warming UP? _Minion, if I sur-vive, I am going to ground you for the rest of your life…" At that moment, Hannah ripped away the driver side door… only to reveal that Cleverlight... wasn't inside? She was, in fact, balanced on top of the door Maul held in her fist.

"You, uh, found me?" Ventress attempted a shaky smile, more confident now that still-warming defuser gun was in her hands.

Obi-wan could only watch as Maul hurled her, door and all, into the sky: high, higher, so far up he lost sight of her. No one could survive a fall from a height like that. She was as good as dead, in Hannah's eyes. And now she was coming for him.

**Well... here's a fine predicament. Good way to end a chapter, right?**

**I hope you enjoyed all the fighting, the trickery of Minion as Cleverlight and Cleverlight as Anakin, and those few times the plot tricks you: Cleverlight's 'death', Anakin back, Hannah leaving town for good... **

**The next chapter will be a couple days to a week, and will be... the last chapter. The grand finale. So, what I want you to do is let me know if you'd enjoy a sequel, plot created by yours truly, or have had enough of Cleverlight and just want the story to end like it does in the next chapter.**


	18. Chapter 18: The last chapter

If you think back WAY to the beginning of this story, where is Cleverlight?

Falling through thin air, correct?

If you remember, her life flashed before her eyes.

Everything you've read so far has been her life. Now it's back to the present. Enjoy ;)

((The line "Rather melodramatic if you ask me" is 'borrowed' from an episode of ponies.))

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><p><em>So, here we are. The be-gin-ning. The end. My life flashing before my eyes. Did you forget that I was falling? That all that is -was- my life? <em>

_It's just me up here, the wind rushing past as I fall. Me and a car door and a defuser ray I'll never use. I'm going to die. I've failed them- Obi-wan, Minion… even Anakin Skywalker. Maybe Anakin Skywalker will be so shaken by Obi-wan's death that he'll leave his house and defeat Maul. Obi-wan's death… and it's my fault. All my fault._

_I look down. I can make out the blue circle in the center of town that must be the fountain. Wait! The fountain… water… Maybe this isn't the end. Maybe I'll keep trying anyway. What can I say? Old habits die very hard… _

She reached down to her belt, for her old standby, the dehydration gun, releasing the defuser gun as she did so. The ground was getting closer now, buildings were surrounding her…

~~~Obi-wan~~~

She was closing in, herding him towards the center of the town, towards the fountain. In on last, desperate attempt, he tried the Force, but it had absolutely no effect of her. _Ok, survey area… Tower blocks off escape to the right and far sides of the fountain. Building to the left. Minion's suit is irreparable for now. Fountain right behind me. In short, I'm doomed. _He continued backing up, stepping into the fountain, with some last strangled hope that Hannah was afraid of water or something. She wasn't.

The car door hit the ground first. Then, into the fountain, right at his feet came... her dehydration gun? Hannah had paused too, curious about this succession of objects from the sky.

Then finally a small, blue cube landed, right between himself and Hannah, in the fountain. Almost the instant it hit the water, the cube rehydrated.

"Where were we?" Ventress asked, eyes blazing, completely unharmed by her fall. "Oh yes…" The defuser ray landed in her arms with a 'thunk'. "Here." The gun bleeped, and its screen flashed from 'Warming up' to 'Defuse'.

She pulled the trigger just as Hannah lunged for her. The sheer force of the blow was enough to knock the Padawan back, and as they watched, she shrank down to her normal height before their eyes. She was up in a flash however, lightsaber drawn.

_Force, I forgot she still had a saber… wait. I have another one too! _Ventress drew her other red saber, but as she did so, Maul smirked.

"You think you can beat me? I'm still a trained Jedi, and your skills are as shaky as you are." It was true. She was litteraly shaking, struggling to stay up, and… he'd seen her sabers in action. It wasn't impressive.

Without another word, Obi-wan reached around her and took the saber into his own hands. "And how about _mine?_"

Maul gulped as Obi-wan stepped forward, leaving Cleverlight to watch. He easily beat her: within only a few strikes he'd disarmed her, sending her saber skittering across the town square. "Ok, I surrender, I surrender!" She yelped as Obi-wan held his saber tip near her throat. The Jedi, who had by now come out of the Temple to watch, began cheering loudly, and Windu and a few others stepped forward to handcuff Hannah.

"Ventress, you did it. You _won."_

"Well, I had help, I… Minion!" She staggered to the other side of the fountain, where the robotic body still lay broken down. "Grievous, we won. Grievous?"

The fish was beginning to look weak. "We… did it?"

"We did it." Ventress smiled down at him, her eyes soft.

"And… we're on the good side now?"

"We certainly are."

"You are. I'm… going." _No... he can't mean it that way, can he? He's been beside Cleverlight all her life..._

"Mmmhmmm."

"This is the end, Sir. This is the tragic end… Goodbye." With that, he closed his eyes and tipped right over.

Obi-wan stared, horror-stricken. Ventress couldn't lose Minion! He was her only friend! As he watched, she lifted his body, face somber… than tossed him into the fountain.

"He does this every once in a while." She told him casually.

Minion sprang back to life the instant he hit the water. "Actually I was wrong, it's not the end! I just needed to be back in the water. Gotcha…"

"Rather melodramatic if you ask me." Ventress whispered, low enough that Grievous wouldn't hear her.

"Yes, he certainly is!" Obi-wan grinned, relieved. They'd done it. They'd made it through completely unharmed, all of them. The Temple would need rebuilding, of course, but they were all here, all perfectly alright…

At that moment, Cleverlight collapsed.

The Jedi gathered around gasped, as did Grievous. Obi-wan managed to react before her face hit the water, holding her up. She was surprisingly heavy- she looked so frail.

"It's ok, it's ok!" Minion shouted from where he sat perched on the water. "This happens someti-" He broke off and dove back under the water for a moment to catch his breath. "Sometimes." He finished. "She just needs to rest a while."

"Are you sure?" A Jedi from the crowd offered. "I'm a healer. Maybe I can help?"

"She just needs rest." Minion asserted. "If someone could get me my extra body from the lair, I could carry her back…"

"That's too far, and we'd have to wait for your suit to arrive." Another Jedi pointed out. "We can just let her rest in the Temple…"

"No!" Minion objected. "She'd hate waking up somewhere she doesn't know."

"She's been to the Temple before." Obi-wan pointed out.

Minion frowned slightly. "No she hasn't…"

_Ah, so you haven't told him about your night time venture to my apartment then, hmm? _"Well… she trusts me, right?"

"I suppose… it's the best option." The fish conceded, still not looking pleased. "Hey. Hey! Hey, don't leave me behind!" He yelled as Obi-wan clambored out of the fountain, carrying Ventress. It was a far harder task than he'd imagined, and eventually Siri came to his rescue and helped carry her booted feet so they wouldn't drag on the ground.

It was in the elevator that the interrogation began. "Why the heck did you just do that?"

"Defeat Hannah?"

"No! Kiss… this." She gestured to Cleverlight, who was still out and lying on the floor. "What happened to your girlfriend?" Siri pouted. "I really liked her. I was going to ask her over for coffee and everything."

"It's a long, long story, but Cleverlight is Brianna. Brianna is Cleverlight."

Siri's jaw dropped. "No. Frikken'. Way! She was in disguise the whole time?"

"Yeah. Could you maybe not talk about it? It's kind of our secret right now, and…" Obi-wan wasn't quite sure how to describe it, but overall, he wasn't the kind of person who liked everyone to know his every move, especially when it came to his love life.

"Sure." Siri still looked a bit freaked out. The elevator dinged open. "And if you found out about her disguise, why did you _still _kiss her?"

Obi-wan paused, considering. Why _did _he suddenly care so much for the woman who'd tricked him? Since when had Cleverlight been important in his world? "I dunno." He finished lamely.

The two Jedi laid Ventress down on Obi-wan's couch, and then Siri ran back with a large stew pot for Minion, and then she went home, leaving her friend and Minion to wait it out.

The clock struck nine. (Obi-wan was fond of clocks that actually made noise when the hour came, because otherwise he would lose all track of time and forget to look at the clock at all ever.) He hadn't realized how late it was, and he hadn't eaten anything since… a very light breakfast towards the beginning of the day. Somehow, he wasn't hungry. The day and its events were catching up to him. Within the past twenty-four hours, he'd discovered his Padawan's super powers, found out the identity of his new girlfriend, had his heart broken, discovered his other Padawan's deepest secret, been tied to Temple Tower, almost died a few times, watched his sweetheart almost die a few times, and defeated his Padawan in a lightsaber duel. Gosh, life moved fast.

~~~Ventress' POV~~~

She awoke suddenly, unaware of where she was, which was always a bad thing. Her arm throbbed. There was something on top of her, and she kicked it hard. It tangled around her ankles, and she kicked a few more times, sitting up. Just blankets. That's all, no need for panicking… Where was she? Where. Was. She? It was dark, and she thought she almost recognized the place, but not quite, and she was certainly not in prison or the lair, or even City Hall.

"Ventress?" Now there was a voice. A voice next to her and she couldn't see what it was coming from.

"Whossiar?" She asked, trying to sound brave through her drowsiness.

"Me. Obi-wan."

With the second word, the location clicked into place. She was in Obi-wan's living room. She'd been here before, and it had been dark then too. "Why am I here? Where's Minion? And Maul, where's Maul?"

"Kitchen and prison, respectively." She could make out a faint outline of his face in the dark, and then he flicked on a flashlight. "Power's out here. They're working on patching up the gaping hole where the Tower used to be until they can build a new one."

"Ok, and… what happened, again? I remember falling… and… a lightsaber fight?"

"In short, you did it. You stopped a mad lady from taking the city."

"Did I? Well, that's… a good thing."

"Everyone is saying you're a hero."

"mm. Fickle bunch aren't they?"

"Are you going to be?"

"Be what?"

"The new hero."

"I don't know."

He was quiet for a moment, the flashlight hanging idly in his hand. "I think you're a hero." Pause. "What you did was much braver, much smarter, much more… heroic than anything Anakin's ever done."

"_What?" _Her pathetic attempts at rescuing, heroism?

"Nothing Anakin does ever requires bravery, or smarts, or guts. Just powers. And when it comes down to it, well, he abandoned us. You came through for me, and for the city."

"I had to. I couldn't let her just… kidnap you. That's _my _job." She gave him a little grin.

"I like your kidnappings much better. And I liked Brianna better than Hannah." He played with the flashlight a little more. "I liked Cleverlight better than Hannah."

"But did you like Cleverlight better than Brianna?" For some reason they were speaking in past tense. She played along.

He swallowed. "Yes. Yes, Ventress, I wanted the villainess."

"Asajj."

"What?"

"That's my name. Asajj." _It takes a lot for her to tell me that. She trusts me._

He abruptly swung the flashlight upwards, shining it on a single card hanging from the ceiling. It was blue, and a single heart was scribbled on it. "I… left it hanging."

"Oh… that. I didn't _mean _to draw that. And it's ridiculous, anyway, because it doesn't look much like a real heart, and love doesn't even come from the heart, biologically, and…" Obi-wan shut her up with a kiss.

"Kenobi? Kenobi is Cleverlight awake?" Minion called from the kitchen. No response. "Kenobi… you guys better not be…" More silence. Oh… they were. They must be kissing. As soon as he got his body back… "Sir! Are you listening to me?" he shouted. Still nothing. Curse the confines of this bowl anyway! "I know you can hear me… guys? I'm a fish, I'm waterbound, please have mercy!"

**Believe it or not... that's the end.**

**A few vital facts:  
>This story clocks in at just over 40,100 words. (and that doesn't count author's notes!)<br>Three pages short of 100 in Microsoft Word.  
>Eighteen chapters.<br>And you read all of it.  
>THANK YOU SO, SO MUCH!<strong>

__**As to the sequel... it's going to be called "Cleverlight: the story of a heroine" because I wanted to contrast with the name of this one. I've got a nice plot currently cooking up, but it's my own, rather than that of Dreamworks, so I do hope it's good. I also ****want to develop Cleverlight a little more as a character. I'm also trying to AVOID the established relationship thing because I hate it when fics open that way, as a general rule. **

**TEASER TIME:  
>Cleverlight, the new hero of Jedi Temple, just wants to do something rightfor a change. Like, not blowing up a third of the city while putting out a fire. Or not going to court for a murder she didn't commit. And keeping her very-much-stuck-in-the-ways-of-evil minion Greivous happy. And not driving her new almost-boyfriend Obi-wan <em>completely <em>insane. But doing things right isn't easy for someone who's always done everything wrong, and sometimes intentionally at that. Of course, there's always that little issue of the mysterious cloud of mist, the missing Jedi, and the escaped sith lord. Oh, and did I mention that everyone expects Cleverlight to solve all these problems?**


End file.
